A Simple Matter
by dsfeo78
Summary: Jane can't seem to catch a break. Not in a case when she can't seem to find her suspect. Not even with dealing with her feelings for Maura. It doesn't help matters when the two issues become interconnected. An AU Rizzles tale but that path to each other has a few bumps in the road.
1. Chapter 1

A Simple Matter

**A/N- New story :D This isn't connected to any of my other works. I label it AU simply because I seen to stray from canon and figure it's better to label it AU than not.**

**It's a Rizzles tale but the road to said Rizzles for my favorite dynamic duo is a little bumpy this time. Nothing super major/heavy in the drama department but definitely not smooth and easy discovery and exploration of their relationship this time. (Also, I do promise not to have any 'dream' endings. Once was my limit I swear.)**

**Because I just can't help it, it's Rizzles with a bit of case/crime story. But by now you should all know me well enough to expect that. Oh, and a few cliffies too. I know, I know- big shocker. There is a lot of bouncing around for this story so please always be mindful of the dates as they will help you keep tabs of when/where we are as the story progresses. Sorry for the flashing but it is meant to add to the suspense.**

**Review/PM me as you feel the impulse. All comments are always welcomed.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Rizzoli & Isles nor should I. I just like to play.**

Chapter One

**May 20th**

There were times when Maura craved silence. For years the silence of her life was her comfort zone. Her escape from the day to day grind that life always seemed to hand everyone. In silence Maura was always able to focus her mind. To organize her thoughts. To center herself and find a peace that allowed her to release the images of all of the horrors she encountered on a daily basis.

But today Maura was struggling with silence. It was threatening to consume her as she now found it anything but peaceful. Silence was betraying her. Where she once sought refuge and escape she now found self doubt and recrimination. Judgement and despair. And she couldn't even dismiss any of it as unjustified.

She looked around the room and tried to remember if she had ever been in such an uncomfortable space before. Cold. Uninviting. Bleak. A part of her wanted to just walk out the door. Get out of the room. But, she knew she wouldn't. Knew she couldn't. Not yet anyway. Not until there was some indication of change.

Her eyes turned their attention back towards the body lying on the bed. She wasn't sure what she was expecting. There hadn't been a change in hours. She glanced up at all of the machines surrounding the bed. All the readouts were the same. Heart rate. Temperature. Oxygen levels. Blood pressure. Blood gases. All the same. Almost cruelly the same.

Leaning back into the chair that she had now logged too many hours Maura allowed her eyes to close. Her mind was still racing too much for her to even think about sleep but she needed the break from the sight in front of her. With her eyes closed she found herself cursing the silence once again.

The opening of the door temporarily disrupted the silence that hung in the room and forced Maura to open her eyes. She was expecting a nurse making rounds. It had been about that time. But it wasn't a nurse walking into the room.

"Hey," Angela acknowledged at Maura as she fully entered the room.

"Angela," Maura replied a bit surprised to be seeing the elder Rizzoli.

Angela approached Maura extending her hand which was holding a cup of coffee for the medical examiner. "Any change?"

Maura gratefully accepted the coffee but shook her head. "None." She didn't even attempt to hide her frustration.

Angela looked towards the hospital bed. "Isn't no change somewhat good news? I mean, at least his condition isn't getting worse." She was trying to find some kind of positive spin.

Maura nodded slightly. There was some truth what Angela was saying. His condition had in fact not deteriorated in the last twelve hours. But Maura couldn't find the comfort in that sentiment.

_He's lying here and it's all my fault. Everything was all my fault._

"This is all my fault," she said releasing a sigh.

"Maura, stop. This was not your fault," Angela responded.

Maura wasn't up for this particular disagreement so she attempted to change topics. "Have you heard from Jane?"

It was now Angela's turn to shake her head. "I keep getting her voicemail. I haven't been able to talk with her since early this morning." She gave Maura an apologetic look.

Maura couldn't help but sigh again. She turned to look at Angela for a minute but then looked back at the man lying on the hospital bed. "How did things go so wrong so fast?" She asked the question out loud but she wasn't necessarily asking Angela for that answer.

Angela, not fully understanding everything that had occurred over the previous two days, didn't even attempt to offer up an answer she did not have.

Both ladies were interrupted by the night nurse. "I'm sorry Dr. Isles but I need the room for a few minutes."

Maura stood up and nodded at the nurse. She approached the bed and leaned down. "I'm just stepping out for a few minutes. I'll come back though. I promise." She straightened up and headed for the door with Angela in tow. She really did need to get out of the room and stretch her legs anyway.

The nurse turned to them as they were almost completely out the door. "I'll only need about thirty minutes with Mr. Washington," she said. "Thank you."

The door closed behind Maura and Angela. Angela stood close to Maura trying to quietly convey that she wasn't going to simply leave because they were asked to leave the room. She hesitated for a minute before speaking what she had been thinking all day.

"Maura, maybe you should try to call Jane. I'm sure she would like to hear an update on Rondo's condition." She paused trying to gauge Maura's reaction. "And I think she might actually answer if she saw that it was you calling."

Maura merely shook her head. "I'm sorry Angela but I think I'm the last person Jane wants to speak with right now." And with that, Maura slowly walked down the hallway without really caring if Angela chose to follow her or not.

Angela stood in the hallway watching Maura walk away. "Oh Maura, what happened between you two?" half mumbling the question to herself. After a few moments, she took off determined to catch up to Maura.

R&I

"We have the ballistics report back from the bullet they recovered from Rondo," Frost said talking to both Jane and Korsak. He had the file in his hand as he reentered the bullpen. "Jane, you were right. It's a match to all the others."

Both Jane and Korsak looked at Frost and simply nodded. Neither was too surprised at this point. Jane pushed herself away from her desk and groaned in frustration. The ballistic results would help in building their case but it wasn't delivering their suspect.

"We need to find this guy," she said letting a look pass between herself and her partners.

"There's a BOLO out for the car. The composite sketch is in the hands of every uniform on the street and it's running on all the local news stations with our tipline number. Jane, we will find the car or someone will recognize the sketch. It's just a matter of time." Korsak tried to reassure Jane.

"Time is something I'm afraid we are running out of," Jane stated in frustration.

The three detectives were all frustrated. They had been chasing after their suspect for two weeks now and really didn't have anything to show for it. A composite sketch. A vehicle description. Another ballistic match. But no identification. No name. No real idea of where to head or look next.

"Jane," Frost started but really didn't know what to say next.

"This guy is a ghost. A shadow. How can we keep coming so close to catching him but yet still have no idea who he actually is?"

"We are getting closer Jane. He's starting to make mistakes," Korsak pointed out.

It was true. Two days ago they had absolutely nothing. But then the guy tried to attack Dr. Isles. That gave them the sketch now circulating in the press and with all the officers. And after what happened last night they added a vehicle description to their information as well. No plate but at least a decent vehicle description.

"Guys, this man has killed three people, he tried to attack Maura and he's the reason Rondo is in that hospital fighting for his life. We need to find him before he hurts anyone else."

Jane opened the ballistic report Frost had carried into the bullpen. She knew it would match the slug that they had recovered from the car in the parking garage. Just as she was certain those bullets and the one removed from Rondo would match the 9 millimeter their suspect had used to kill the three victims over the last two weeks.

"Rondo is going to be alright Jane," Frost tried to offer.

All three of them were worried about Jane's smooth talking confidential informant. A man all of them had come to see as a friend. A man they also now all considered a hero after what had happened the day before.

Jane gave a slight nod but wasn't in a place where she could let herself focus on that. Flashes of Rondo laying on the ground bleeding from the gunshot wound flashed through her mind. She forcibly squeezed her eyes closed shaking her head slightly trying to get the images out of her head.

Both Frost and Korsak were looking at each other not trying to hide their concern. Concern for Rondo but also concern for their partner. Jane was hurting and had been over the last two days and neither man really knew what to do for her. Rondo's injuries just seemed to pile onto the problems Jane was already having. Neither detective understood the extent to which or the real reason behind the fact that Jane was hurting but they knew her well enough to know she was on the ledge and it frightened each of them a bit.

"Have you had any updates?" Korsak asked quietly. He was treading lightly on this as he fully understood where any update on Rondo would be coming from and he was pretty sure Jane wasn't ready to talk about any of that, or her, yet.

"Not since late last night when Frankie was ending his protection detail shift," Jane mumbled.

Both Frost and Korsak took that to mean Jane still hadn't spoken to Maura since the incident.

"Jane, maybe you should..." Frost started to offer up but the look that immediately swept across Jane's face stopped him mid sentence.

"No," was all she said. She knew what he had been about to suggest. He was about to suggest that she should talk to Maura. But that was the one thing that Jane wasn't ready or able to do.

_This is all my fault. I'm the last person Maura wants to be dealing with right now._

The ringing of Korsak's phone interrupted any of them from being able to say anything more.

"Korsak," Vince said into his phone and then listened. Frost and Jane stared at him expectantly. "We're heading out." He hung up the phone and turned to his partners. "We may have him. He may be holed up at a no-tell motel off 95. Two officers called in a possible hit on the vehicle and the desk clerk gave a tentative ID from the composite sketch. SWAT is mobilizing."

All three grabbed their jackets and headed out without further comment. All three thinking the same thing.

_Please let this be the guy. This needs to end._

R&I

Angela finally caught up with Maura but not before the ME had walked out into the hospital's outdoor atrium. Maura had taken a seat on a bench and Angela sat down next to her. She wasn't sure if Maura wanted to talk or just sit in silence so she didn't say anything. Instead, she just reached over and took Maura's hand in her own.

After a few minutes in silence Maura turned her head and looked at Angela. "I messed up Angela. I think I may have lost Jane forever." She couldn't stop the single tear that escaped down her cheek.

"Maura," Angela started while reaching up to wipe away the tear running down Maura's cheek, "what happened between you and Jane?" She just didn't understand anything that had gone on between the two over the last two days. "I don't understand why you think you've lost Jane or why you even think she wouldn't want to speak with you."

Maura looked at Angela and wasn't even sure she could begin to explain what had happened. In truth, she was completely confused by the entire situation. Especially her own actions.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

**May 5th**

"What do we got?" Jane asked as she walked up to Frost. She was just finishing putting the latex gloves on her hands and she was surveying the immediate area.

"Female victim. GSW to the chest. No ID. Dr. Isles is giving an initial estimation on age as early twenties," Frost began to fill in his partner on what she was walking up towards.

The body had been found along the banks of the Charles River. The victim was hidden off the path of the bike trail but not buried. A jogger found the body about an hour prior.

"Do we have an estimate on time of death?" Jane asked now standing in front of the victim. The question had been directed at Maura.

"I won't be able to give you an accurate estimation on that until I get her back to the lab. Exposure to the elements and decomposition rate make it impossible for me to do that here," Maura said without even looking up at Jane. She was finishing the last of her initial examination.

"I know you won't make a guess but are we talking sometime in the last 24 hours or something longer than that?" Jane asked. She loved how precise her best friend was most of the time but there were times Jane would give anything for Maura to just offer up a guess. An educated guess from Maura Isles was virtually fact for anyone else.

"All I can say with any level of certainty is that she has been dead for more than 24 hours. Anything else will need to come from a complete autopsy," Maura stated as she stood up. She signaled for a CSRU tech to take a few more photographs and then turned her attention to the detectives. "She can be removed from here as soon as Jeff gets the rest of the photos. I'm sorry Jane but I really can't give you much else for the moment."

Jane nodded. It wasn't Maura's fault and she had come to understand that working with the best ME anyone had ever dealt with meant accepting that Maura never offered up a guess. "Any other injuries besides the GSW?"

Maura nodded her head. "Multiple cuts and abrasions. Bruising all over the body. Her left tibia appears to be fractured but I'll wait for X-rays to confirm that. Jane, she's been through an ordeal." Maura paused and looked back down at the body laying close to her feet. She would never understand why or how a human being could brutalize another person.

"Evidence of sexual assault?" Jane asked also looking down at the body. She didn't understand human nature either. The girl was probably not even 24 years old yet. No one should have to suffer through all it appeared she went through.

"I won't know that until I get her to the lab," she offered. "There does appear to be particulates underneath her fingernails. I'll have her hands bagged to preserve any of the evidence."

Jane nodded. "Are you going back with the body?"

"Yes," Maura answered. She wanted to get started on this autopsy right away.

"Can you have the lab rush her blood sample through CODIS? We don't have an ID yet." She knew Frost was working on the girl's prints but sometimes they got lucky with running DNA.

"Sure," Maura said. "Do you need anything else?"

Jane looked down at the body for a moment. She then took a step back and let herself survey the entire crime scene. This took her a few minutes.

Frost and Maura had repeatedly witnessed Jane do this. It was part of her routine and both knew not to say anything to interrupt her concentration. Jane's attention to detail was one of the reasons why she was one of the best homicide detectives in the department.

Still not saying anything Jane knelt down over the victim and let her eyes run up and down what was in front of her. She didn't need to be a doctor to see some of the cuts and bruises Maura had mentioned. The girl had indeed been through an ordeal. And from the looks of it had put up one hell of a fight.

Pausing briefly at the hands Jane noticed something faint on the back of the victim's left hand. Looking up she finally spoke. "Maura, do you have a blacklight?"

Before Maura could answer either way Frost interjected. "CSRU does." He turned to a tech, "Greg, a blacklight?"

The tech nodded and walked off to the van to grab one for Frost and returned quickly handing the blacklight to the detective. Frost approached and handed it to Jane. "What are you thinking?"

Jane points to the top of the left hand. "See it?"

Frost leans in and squints. "Damn, I missed that before."

Jane turned on the light and held it above the victim's left hand. The marking wasn't in pristine condition anymore but with the help of the blacklight Jane had found a handstamp. It was blurry but she had seen it before. She knew where it came from. She looked up at Frost.

"Jake's." They both stated together.

Jane stood up and turned off the blacklight. She looked at Maura. "Ok, you can take her. Rape kit and a tox screen as quickly as possible if you would be so kind Doc."

Maura nodded and smiled. She did everything quickly for Jane. "I'll see what I can do."

Jane watched Maura walk off towards the waiting CSRU techs. Jane knew she would supervise the victim's removal from the scene and then follow the coroner's vehicle back to the station. She turned her attention to Frost. "Did you get a usable face shot?"

Frost nodded. "I have something we can use on my iPad."

Jane nodded and looked at the scene one more time. It was time to get out. "Let's go see what Slim can tell us," she said looking at Frost. They both walked towards Jane's car.

R&I

Jake's was a seedy but popular 'entertainment' establishment down near the docks. While technically not an official strip club, Jake's had female dancers whose costumes barely met the legal definition of clothing. The place catered to the blue collar union dock workers and Jane was always pretty sure the club was funded by mob connections. When Jane worked Vice and Narc she routinely raided Jake's finding everything from prostitution and sex trafficking to drugs of any and all varieties.

Jake's was the type of establishment that made Jane always feel like burning her clothes if she stayed inside the place for too long. She never had that much faith in laundry detergent to get the wretchedness of Jake's out of anything she would accidently touch. She was pretty sure there were diseases in Jake's that even the CDC had never seen before.

Frost and Jane parked out in front of Jake's. Getting out of the car Jane looked at Frost. "I'm telling you right now it's your turn. I'm not touching anything in there. I like these clothes and I refuse to get rid of them. I'm still dealing with that fish smell in my car."

Frost snickered. Jake's wasn't his kind of place but he didn't have the germ or disease fear that Jane had. He seemed to trust his laundry detergent more than she apparently did. "I suppose it is my turn," he said with a smile. "And I didn't smell any fish." The week prior Jane had to tackle a suspect into a bin of fish guts on these very docks. She claimed the smell lingered on her and in her car for two days. It was Frost's turn for the dirty work if it became necessary.

"It most certainly is your turn," she answered back with a challenging smile.

They made their way into the club nodding a polite hello to the bouncer working the door. Both Frost and Jane headed straight to the bar and waited for the bartender to greet them.

"What'll it be?" the young bartender asked. Jane's first thought was that the kid didn't even look old enough to drink.

"We need to speak with Slim," Jane said loud enough to get over the rhythmic dance music filling the club. Neither Jane nor Frost bothered to turn to look at the dancers on the stage.

Frost flashed his badge and the bartender nodded. He walked over to a phone and picked it up. Within a few seconds he had said something and then hung up. He turned to the detectives nodding to indicate that he conveyed their request but then stayed towards the other end of the bar clearly not wanting to chat with two police officers.

About three minutes later a booming voice seemed to carry all the way across the club. "Rizzoli, last I checked I ain't dead. So you can't possibly be looking for me."

Jane smiled at the man now approaching her and Frost. "What can I say? I've missed you."

The man approaching Jane and Frost was definitely the opposite of his given nickname. Freddy 'Slim' Sullivan had been the listed proprietor of Jake's for over 25 years. He was in his mid 60s and outside of his girth, 335 lbs, he was in relatively decent shape. The man didn't look it but he was just a teddy bear if he liked you. And he liked Jane. Jane, and everyone else for that matter, had never bought into the notion that Slim actually owned the club. Most everyone assumed he was a front man for the mob.

"Anytime you want to leave that day job of yours I've got a spot for you here," Slim said with a smile.

Had Frost been trying to swallow anything in that moment he would have choked. As it was he was desperately trying not to break out laughing at the mental image now inappropriately entering his head.

"There's a better likelihood of you getting up on that stage than me," Jane responding back. "Cut the small talk. I need some information."

Slim had finally made his way to Jane and Frost and nodded. Frost pulled out his iPad and opened up the photo of their victim to show Slim. "Do you recognize her?" Frost asked.

Slim studied the photo for a few minutes but then finally shook his head. "No. She ain't one of my girls."

Jane had known Slim for years. He was a lot of things but the man wasn't a liar. So she was confident their victim wasn't one of Jake's dancers. "Alright, but have you seen her in here recently?"

Slim looked at the photo again and studied it. He looked up but turned to the bartender. "Kip, come look at this."

The bartender reluctantly made his way back down the bar and looked at the photo on Frost's iPad. "I've seen her in here before," he answered after studying the photo.

"You remember when the last time was?" Jane asked.

"Saturday night," Kip answered. "Sat at that table," he said pointing to a corner table, "with three others. Another girl and two guys. I remember because I couldn't help but think that this was a very unusual place for a double date."

Jane couldn't think of a less appropriate place for a date than Jake's. "Can you describe the others?"

Kip thought for a minute. "The other female was brunette. Shoulder length with bangs. Pretty face but not much body to her." He closed his eyes trying to recall anything. "Sorry, but I can't help you with the guys."

Jane nodded and turned to Slim. "I need Saturday's video Slim," she said with an expecting smile.

"Rizzoli, you know our policy," Slim stated.

"Don't go citing privacy bullshit to me Slim. And don't make me get a court order. I need that video." She was harsher this time.

Slim nodded. He was going to help the detective out anyway. He just liked giving her a hard time. He turned to Kip, "What time?"

"I saw them as early as 10 pm," Kip told his boss.

Slim looked at the two detectives. "Have a seat and have a drink. I'll burn the footage for you," he said and turned to go back to his office.

Jane leaned into Frost and whispered, "Neither of us is sitting." They had come there in her car.

Frost snickered.

"Or drinking."

Another snicker from Frost. Both detectives stood with arms crossed and patiently waited for Slim to get them their requested video.

"Or generally touching anything." She was already thinking about throwing out her shoes.

R&I

Two hours later Jane and Frost had managed to get a positive ID on their victim. Her prints were on file and she had a record. Kelly Franklin was 23 years old and had arrests for prostitution and drug possession. The video from Jake's did show the foursome at the club but they hadn't been able to identify the other three people that Franklin had been with. The video was not extremely clear in its quality. Slim had checked his records for Jane and the group paid cash for their beverages that night.

But a name was a start for Jane. Frost was running her through the court system to see if there was a current address on file. They needed to do a notification if they could find an address or any family.

"Got an address," Frost said. Jane nodded and grabbed her phone.

_Going to do a notification and then I'm done for the night. Can you still make movie night? J_

Jane stood up after sending the text and put on her blazer. Her phone vibrated a message.

_I'll be finished here in about two hours. My place at 8? M_

_I'll bring dinner. Pizza or Chinese? J_

_Chinese please. M_

_See you at 8. J_

Jane couldn't help the smile that crossed her face. No matter how crazy her and Maura's schedules got they always tried to keep their standing Friday night movie night. She was glad tonight would be no different. Usually it turned into the highlight of her week.

She clipped her phone back in the case and headed out with Frost to the address he had found for Kelly Franklin.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

**May 5th**

Promptly at 8 pm Jane entered the house through the side door with dinner in hand. "Maura?" she shouted out when her first glance through the lower level did not locate the ME. She got all the way into the kitchen before she heard her best friend shout down from upstairs.

"I'll be down in a minute," Maura's voice filled the kitchen.

Jane placed the food down on the kitchen counter and began to set up for dinner. She pulled out two plates from a cupboard and took out silverware from the drawer. She then opened the bag of take out and dished up both dinners onto the plates. Once done she placed both plates side by side at the kitchen island. She then turned to the refrigerator to get drinks.

"Do you want wine, beer or water?" Jane yelled out with her back to the kitchen ensuring that she didn't see Maura had entered.

"You don't need to shout," Maura said with a grin. "Water for me please."

Jane turned and smiled. She had to force herself not to react to the vision in front of her. "Sorry, I thought you were still upstairs." Glad for the distraction and ability to turn herself away from Maura she reached into the refrigerator and pulled out two bottles of water. This took just a few beats longer than it should have. Jane was trying to compose herself before facing Maura again. Stalling for a few more seconds she added, "I got you the shrimp with lobster sauce and two extra spring rolls."

Jane had always been taken by Maura's beauty. In a word, she was breathtaking. To Jane, Maura's beauty was innate and natural. It had nothing to do with her style. Nothing to do with her wardrobe. Although both were impeccable. Maura's beauty came from who she was. Her inner beauty just seemed to radiate from her stronger than anything Jane had ever witnessed from another person before.

Maura had many looks. The formal, elegant socialite. The hard working, dedicated doctor. The Maura defined attempt at casual. But Jane's favorite look for Maura was exactly how she was right now. The completely relaxed and comfortable Maura. Makeup removed. Hair down. Simple t-shirt and yoga pants. It was a look few others were allowed to see. Jane understood this and it seemed to add to her enjoyment knowing she was one of the few allowed to enjoy it.

Pulling herself together and back into the moment Jane made her way to the kitchen island with the bottles of water in hand. She placed one in front of Maura's spot and took her seat. She was confident that she had gotten herself back in check and would be able to enjoy dinner with her friend without any issues.

Maura smiled as she fully entered the kitchen. Sometimes her comfort level with Jane would hit her out of the blue. This was one of those times. She walked over to the kitchen island and looked down at hers and Jane's dinner. Jane not only knew what to order for her without asking but she also remembered to get extra spring rolls. But that wasn't even what made Maura's smile grow. That was a direct response to what else was on her plate.

Jane always ordered Kung Pao chicken. Maura liked it but not enough to make it her entire dinner. Looking at the dinner in front of Maura she couldn't help but smile when she saw a small helping of Kung Pao chicken was added to her plate. Jane always shared and it just struck Maura that she didn't even seem to have to ask.

Jane noticed the smile. "What?" she asked not sure what was making the ME smile the way she was.

"Nothing," Maura said quickly dismissing Jane. When Maura had her moments involving Jane she rarely shared them. She never even really understood why she wouldn't but they felt private and special so she just let it go. "Thanks for getting dinner. I'm starving."

Both ladies sat down and started to eat. Casual conversation ensued. They never seemed to run out of things to talk about which sometimes surprised the medical examiner. As far as personalities were concerned, they couldn't be more opposite of each other if they tried. And yet, they worked. They fit. And for the only time in Maura's life, it was effortless. Easy.

Generally, both women did a good job of not talking about work when they were off. Their jobs were demanding and stressful and each had learned early on that it was best to try not to bring any cases home with them. There had to be a break. Some sense that they could get away from the horrors they dealt with on an almost daily basis.

That was how Friday night movie night had started. When the two first became friends they would watch an occasional movie with each other. When they did that they found that they stopped talking about work and just started to really get to know each other and enjoy a few hours of good conversation and sometimes decent movies. Sometimes their choices were bad but even a bad movie turned into a good night for them both.

Somewhere along the way movie night turned into a Friday night ritual. Neither one specifically targeted Friday or made the request for it to be permanent. It just seemed to work out that way. Both usually had Saturdays off so if the night ran late they didn't suffer from lack of sleep the next day. The occasional movie started becoming a weekly thing. Both ladies seemed to decline invitations that would take the Friday night away from the two of them. After awhile all those who knew them even stopped asking either of them about events if it fell on a Friday night. Friday night had officially just became 'their' time together.

They finished dinner and Maura handled the clean up which merely amounted to rinsing off the dinner plates and putting them into the dishwasher. Once that was finished the two made their way into Maura's family room to watch a movie. It was Maura's turn to pick as they alternated both turns as well as categories.

Movie night had rules. Rules established over time that seemed to keep each from annoying or boring the other unnecessarily. The rules were simple.

1- Specific choice of movie would rotate on an every-other pick basis

2- Movies were categorized into the following: New release, Action, Drama, Comedy, Romantic Comedy, Classic, Sci-fi and Guilty Pleasure

3- Neither lady was allowed to repeat a category until they had gone through all the others first

4- Foreign language/subtitled movies needed mutual approval and at least one week's notice prior to viewing

5- Documentaries had to count as a guilty pleasure or new release

6- Any attempt to veto the movie selection must have a specific justification and the chooser of said movie would make the final call on veto rights only after hearing said justification

7- All Horror movies were considered a guilty pleasure and also required mutual agreement and at least one week's notice prior to viewing with the exception of the Halloween movie marathon which was exempt from all movie night rules

8- Neither lady was allowed to whine about any movie choice. Each could explain, only after watching the movie, why they did or did not like the movie but once the movie was selected there was to be no whining or complaining allowed

Simple rules but Jane and Maura followed them to the letter. They found it spiced up the variety of what they watched together and helped them avoid the trap of watching the same types of movies over and over. To date, neither had exercised any attempt to veto a choice of movie but both secretly believe that they would allow any veto request from the other without much need for justification.

"So, what category?" Jane asked as she settled onto her usual spot on Maura's couch.

"Guilty pleasure," Maura said with a smile.

Jane nodded and started to mentally prepare herself for some science related documentary. "Ok, what do I get to look forward to tonight?"

Maura didn't answer. Instead she turned on the movie and turned to claim her usual spot on the couch next to Jane.

Jane figured it was not going to be good for her since Maura had not yet listed the movie. She was bracing herself for a documentary. Maura hit a few buttons on the remote to skip past the previews and started the movie.

The minute the opening credits started Jane knew exactly what they were going to be watching for the night. She turned to Maura, "Seriously?" she asked excitedly unable to contain the grin on her face.

Maura snickered. "Seriously. What can I say. I just like this one." She had a feeling Jane was expecting a documentary but Maura was in the mood for an actual movie that night.

Both women got comfortable with Maura snuggling up into Jane's side as the movie started. This, too, had become just part of movie night tradition. Their positions on the couch were a given. A standard. But that standard had evolved over the years. In the beginning, each had sat in separate chairs. Their friendship was new and that felt right. But as time went on and they got more and more comfortable with each other separate chairs turned into sitting together on Jane or Maura's couch.

When that started they at first would stay at opposite ends of the couch with the middle cushion in between them. But again, as time went on, the middle cushion stopped being a space barrier between the two friends. Now, the normal couch positioning for movie night was Jane at one end of the couch with Maura nestled into her side. Again, they were in a place in their friendship that it just felt right.

About halfway through the movie, Maura fell asleep. It surprised Jane but didn't shock her. Maura made it through most movies but would on occasion fall asleep either because she was too tired or sometimes simply because she was too relaxed to make it through the entire movie. Jane grabbed the remote and turned down the volume on the TV to just loud enough that Jane could follow along but low enough not to disturb the now sleeping beauty curled into her. She took a blanket from the back of the couch and gently placed it across Maura and returned her attention to the rest of the movie.

Jane tried to watch the movie but found that tonight was one of the nights she allowed herself to be distracted by the woman now using her as a pillow. Letting her eyes drift over to Maura, Jane released a heavy sigh. The beauty of her friend was something that seemed beyond comprehension. Jane sometimes wondered if she would ever get used to being in Maura's presence and not be totally thrown by her beauty. But as she thought about that she knew she wouldn't ever be used to it and more importantly she knew she didn't want to be used to it.

R&I

The movie was nearing the end but Jane was still paying more attention to Maura than the images on the screen. There was just something about a completely relaxed and sleeping Maura that Jane found mesmerizing. So wrapped up in the moment Jane didn't hear Angela enter from the guest house.

Angela knew the girls' Friday night routine. Dinner and then a movie. Every Friday night. The only thing she had to pay attention to was if the movie night was at Maura's or Jane's. The Rizzoli matriarch would never join the two although she had been invited on several occasions. She learned early on that the two just really needed time together so she never wanted to interrupt that. She understood that both used their Friday night movie night as a way of unwinding from the stress of their jobs.

However, on occasion, she would stop over a drink or dessert when she was sure the movie was at an end. It wasn't frequent but from time to time she did wander over to see them both. Thoughts of something sweet was what had brought Angela over to the main house that night. She had come looking for dessert but had found an entirely different kind of 'sweet' as she entered Maura's family room.

The TV was on and a movie was nearing its end but neither woman seemed to be aware of that fact. Maura was sound asleep and using Jane as a pillow. It appeared as if Jane was watching Maura sleep more than she was watching the end of the movie. The scene was quiet and tender. And sweet. Angela let herself enjoy it for a few more moments before quietly clearing her throat to get Jane's attention without awaking up Maura.

Jane, hearing Angela for the first time, snapped up her head but greeted her mother with a smile. "Hey," she whispered quietly.

Angela returned the smile and looked back up at the TV. The movie was ending. "Really Jane, she might actually stay awake if you'd pick out a better movie than that," she said with heavy sarcasm.

Jane snickered. "Hey, it was her choice this week. This," she nodded towards the TV, "was all her doing."

Angela raised an eyebrow a little surprised at Maura's movie choice. Who would have thought that the medical examiner would pick _Vacation_ as a movie to watch?

Jane grabbed the remote and turned off the TV. She looked up at Angela. "Let me get her up to bed."

Angela nodded but continued to watch her daughter. She watched as Jane skillfully shifted herself and Maura on the couch so she was able to stand up and pick up the sleeping doctor with minimal jostling. So smooth was Jane's movements Angela knew two things: (1) Maura wouldn't wake up and (2) Jane had done this numerous times before that night.

Angela continued to watch as Jane adjusted Maura's weight on her arms so she could carry her up the stairs. The scene warmed Angela's heart. Once Jane was completely out of view Angela wandered into the kitchen to wait for her daughter to rejoin her. A few minutes later Jane made her way into the kitchen.

"Hey Ma," Jane said now able to have a much better conversation with Angela with Maura all tucked into bed.

"Are you ever going to tell her?" Angela asked locking her eyes with Jane's.

Jane sighed. For a moment the instinct to simply ignore the question washed over her but she fought it off and maintained eye contact with her mother. "No," was the answer she gave. She really didn't want to have this conversation again with her mother.

"Jane..." Angela started but was cut off.

"Ma, no. I'm never going to tell her." Jane continued to stare at her mother. "And neither will you."

A moment of silent stubbornness passed between the two women.

Angela finally broke the silence. "I know it's not my place to say anything to her. But I will again go on the record as saying she has the right to know how you feel."

"Since it's my feelings we are talking about here, I have the right to keep them to myself," Jane answered back without even a hint of apology in her tone.

"You both deserve the chance to be happy," Angela tried to push the conversation just a little further.

"Maura in my life is what makes me happy. I won't jeopardize that." Jane stared at her mother intently. "Ever."

Angela knew that look. And she knew it meant that it was time to talk about something else. Reluctantly, Angela shifted topics noticing immediately Jane's demeanor relax when she was sure Angela was done with discussing her feelings for Maura. For the last year Angela had been trying to understand why her daughter was so convinced that she couldn't tell Maura she was in love with her. A year. And Angela was nowhere even close to an answer to that question. She silently wondered if she would ever understand it.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

**May 20th**

**Mass General**

"Maura, I know that I'm not technically your mother. But I do consider you my daughter. You are family. If you need to talk, you can talk to me." Angela wasn't sure if she was going to get the ME to open up to her about whatever had happened between her and Jane over the last two days.

Maura released a heavy sigh. She was conflicted. Part of her wanted to open up and tell Angela everything. Maura also saw Angela as family. In many ways Angela had been more of a parent to Maura than her own. Over the years Maura found she took comfort in Angela's unabashed love of her family. Sure she was a little over the top but it all came from love and Maura just couldn't hold that against the woman sitting next to her.

But another part of her was afraid to talk to Angela because she was Jane's mother. That didn't bother Maura in the sense that she thought Angela would take Jane's side. It bothered her in the sense that she was sure Jane didn't want Angela to know certain details about Jane's life. Including what had happened between the two.

Maura was already in enough trouble with Jane as it was. She wasn't sure adding having a very private, very personal conversation with her mother to the list of reasons Jane was mad at her. The current list was just too long as it was.

"Angela," Maura started, "believe me when I tell you that as much as I want to answer your question about Jane and I, I don't think I can answer your question about Jane and I. Not right now anyway. I'm sorry."

Angela understood. She didn't like it but she understood. There wasn't a single part of her that didn't understand Jane's desire to keep her private life private. Getting Jane to talk about herself or her life was like pulling teeth. Most of Angela expected Maura to turn her down. She wasn't hurt or surprised by Maura's refusal to confide in her.

"I just need you to know that no matter what I am here for you," Angela said reaching out and taking Maura's hand. She did nothing to hide the love she felt for Maura. "Maura, it could have been you..." she suddenly stopped. She was too choked up to continue.

For the first time since the events of the night before had played out Maura let it sink in just how close she came to being the one lying in the hospital bed. Just how close she came to actually being killed. It was one thing to escape a dangerous situation once but the realization that she had cheated death for a second time in two days finally seemed to crack the outer shell Maura had so valiantly tried to maintain. The impact of that realization became instantly noticeable within Maura. Her eyes teared up and her body began to tremble.

Angela picked up on this and immediately pulled Maura into a tight embrace trying to comfort her. The last thing she had intended on doing was upsetting her. She pulled Maura firmly against her and ran her hands gently across Maura's back.

"Shhhh! It's alright Maura. You're safe. You're ok." Angela repeated over and over trying to calm down Maura.

Slowly, Angela's soft reassurances helped and Maura calmed herself down. After a few moments she pulled herself away from Angela and looked up. "I'm sorry," she tried to apologize.

"Stop," was all Angela said. "You have nothing to be sorry about."

It was a simple statement. But it hurt Maura. Hurt her deeply for the simple fact that Angela couldn't have been more wrong. The list of things Maura had to be sorry for over the last two days was longer than she knew how to even try to go about explaining or dealing with. Everything was a mess and it was all her fault.

R&I

**May 20th**

**Rodeway Inn Motel**

"It's our guy," Frost stated emphatically to Jane and Korsak as he came out of the motel manager's office. He had watched the video playback of their suspect checking into the motel. "He used the name 'Jason Bourne' and tried to keep his face off the video camera but the manager has four cameras in the lobby and there's really good face shot footage. It's him."

Jane was happy for the confirmation. She was even happy that their suspect had checked into this no-tell motel. The owner had added video cameras to every legal inch of the property. Between the prostitution, drug deals, assaults and robberies that seemed to occur onsite as often as it did, the owner had found it very handy to have as much video footage of 'incidents' as he could. It helped him fight off countless civil lawsuits. It helped the police with criminal investigations too.

"Is he inside?" Jane asked a bit on edge.

"I watched him enter into the room. That was about," and he looked down at his watch, "three hours ago. I watched video up until five minutes ago. He has not yet exited that room."

Jane nodded. She looked at Korsak. "Ok, he's in there. How do we play this?"

Jane, Frost, Korsak and the SWAT commander all looked at each other. "Does anyone want to wait for him to come out on his own?" Korsak asked.

No one answered 'yes'.

"So we go in after him," the SWAT commander answered. "My guys are ready," he said looking at the three detectives.

All three nodded. "The other rooms?" Jane asked Frost.

"Empty. There's only one other occupant on this level and she is out right now." One of the street girls stayed at the motel but the owner assured the team that she was out 'working'.

"Alright, that addresses civilian concerns. Get your men in place. Let's do this," Jane said to the SWAT leader who walked off to brief his men.

Jane, Korsak and Frost walked to Jane's car as she popped the trunk. All three pulled out Kevlar vests and put them on. It was standard procedure if they were going to participate in any raid. But this guy was dangerous. He had killed three people. Plus he had already tried to hurt their medical examiner and Rondo was still trying to recover from what happened to him. None of the three were going to take any chances.

Kevlar on, Jane and the boys joined the SWAT briefing to listen to the remaining details of the operation. All the members of the team had been inside the rooms of this motel at one time or another. Layout and obstacles were not going to be an issue. This kind of warrant execution was second nature to them all.

As far as the team knew the element of surprise was still on their side. It was not believed that the suspect was aware of the growing police presence outside of the motel. That would help the SWAT team's pursuit of the suspect.

"You all know the insides of these rooms. Our suspect has two basic choices right now. He's either sitting or standing near the bed or he is in the bathroom. There is a window that opens in the bathroom but Jackson, Tillman and Jones will cover that exit route. Fletcher and Stahl you have the ram. Myself, Pratt and Fisher will enter in the first wave followed by Rizzoli, Frost and Korsak. The rest of you hold position out here.

"Guys, this is anything but a routine warrant execution. So no one, and I mean no one, relax and take any of this for granted. Our suspect's number is five killed or wounded. I will not have it get to six on my watch. Understood?"

Every officer stated a firm, solid and collective "Yes," to the commander's question.

"Alright. Get in place. Let's get this SOB and everyone goes home tonight."

The SWAT team scattered to their assigned areas. With one last collective nod between them, Jane, Frost and Korsak all took position behind the initial assault force set to break down the motel door.

The SWAT team moved with precision. Once the three men signaled the rear window exit was secured and guarded the commander made one visual check for his team's readiness and then gave the signal.

The battering ram smashed into the door which gave away easily. The first wave entered a fraction of a second after the door crashed open. Shouts of "Police" filled the air. Within mere seconds after first entry everyone started to hear other calls as well.

"Clear."

The room was empty. He wasn't in the bathroom. He wasn't in a closet. He wasn't even under the bed. Their suspect was just not there.

Jane looked around the tiny room in disbelief and disgust. "Damn it!"

They had lost him again.

R&I

**Mass General**

"I need to get back," Maura said interrupting the silence that had washed over the two woman. Maura stood up and turned towards the door leading back into the hospital. She couldn't help but notice the police officer shift and start to move once she stood up. Maura had briefly forgotten that she was still under a protective detail.

Angela followed Maura's eyes over to the officer but then looked back at Maura. "What?" she asked.

Maura wanted to tell Angela that the sight of the police officer had been a reminder for her that Jane at least didn't hate her. In fact, it was her only evidence at the moment that Jane didn't hate her. But she couldn't put that into words. She knew Jane requested the detail. She even knew Jane had requested Frankie be a part of that detail. She couldn't help the comfort she took in knowing that Jane still cared about her on some level even after everything that had happened.

"Nothing," Maura finally answered Angela. "Frankie was my detail last night. I think he will be again tonight. You should stay so you can talk with him," she said as the two women headed back towards Rondo's room. "He had to have been bored just sitting here all night. Tonight won't be any different."

"Maura," Angela stated with her concerned mother tone, "you need to go home and get some rest. You have to be exhausted."

Maura shook her head. "I'm fine. And I'm not leaving here until Rondo wakes up."

"Maura," Angela started but she was cut off.

"I will not let him wake up and be in a hospital room all alone. I won't do that Angela so don't ask me. That should be me in that bed. Not him. I won't leave him alone."

Angela was a little startled with Maura's tone. She was never usually forceful about anything. "Alright. I do understand. But Maura, you need to understand something. Neither of you should be in that bed. This wasn't your fault. As much as Rondo doesn't deserve what is happening to him, neither do you."

They walked the rest of the way to Rondo's room in silence. Maura just couldn't comment on what Angela had said. She opened the door to see if the nurse had finished with Rondo was was glad that she was just finishing up.

"Perfect timing," the nurse said with a smile. "He's all finished for the night."

Maura entered the room and headed back over to the chair she'd claimed as her own some thirty hours ago. "Thank you," she said to the nurse.

"Dr. Isles?" the nurse asked.

"Yes?"

"Is there anything I can get for you? A pillow or a blanket maybe?" The nurse knew Maura hadn't left Rondo's room for more than thirty minutes since he had become a patient.

"No thank you. I'm fine," she said as she sat down in the chair.

"Well, if you change your mind or you need anything, just press the call button. I'm on until 4 am." With that the nurse left the room.

"I'm going to get you something to eat," Angela started. "And don't fuss. If you won't go home then the very least you can do is eat something. Coffee can only sustain you for so long Maura and you know it."

Maura couldn't really argue with that. "Could you get me a turkey sandwich?" she asked. If she was honest with herself she would admit that she was hungry.

Angela didn't reply. She simply grabbed her purse and headed out to get Maura food. Maura knew Angela would return with more than a turkey sandwich as much as she knew Angela wouldn't get that sandwich from the hospital. She turned her attention back to the man lying in the bed.

"You keep fighting Rondo. You need to come back to us," she said as she settled into the chair to watch over the man that had saved her life.

R&I

**Rodeway Inn Motel**

"Jane, there's nothing more we can do here," Korsak tried to say to Jane.

Jane was pacing up and down the landing while the CSRU team was going over everything inside the room. She absentmindedly rubbed the scar on her left hand as she paced.

"He's a shadow Vince. A ghost," she mumbled as she passed by him while pacing.

She was clearly frustrated. They were seemingly back to square one trying to catch this guy.

"He's not a ghost Jane. He's human and he's making mistakes. We are closing in on him. We will catch him. We will," he tried to sound as optimistic as possible.

"You've said that before and yet here we are. Great leads but no suspect. Because he's vanished again."

Korsak didn't know what else to say. He understood Jane was frustrated that they hadn't caught the man they were looking for but he understood even more that she was upset about something else entirely. He didn't have a clue what had happened between Jane and Maura but whatever it was it was eating Jane up inside.

"Why don't you go see how Rondo is doing," he offered up. That suggestion stopped the pacing detective in an instant. "I'll stay and supervise the tech team. We won't have any of the results until morning. There isn't anything else here to do. Go see Rondo. I think you need that Jane."

"There are reports to file for this," she offered up as a pathetic excuse for not wanting to go to the hospital.

"I'll handle that," offered Frost. "Go."

They both knew she wanted to see Rondo. But they both knew she was aware that Maura was camped out at the hospital. Neither man knew if Jane would agree to risk a run in with the ME. Both were surprised when Jane yielded.

"Are you both sure?" she asked in a quiet voice.

"Yes," came simultaneously from both.

"Go see Rondo. I'd like to know how he's holding up anyway," Frost added.

"See him and then go home. You haven't slept in almost two days. You need some rest Jane. When," and Korsak put extra emphasis on the word 'when', "we do get another lead on this guy we are going to need you at full strength."

Jane nodded. "Call me if there is anything. Anything at all."

"You will be my first call," Korsak confirmed. Both detectives watched a tired, upset and worried Jane head for her car.

"Do you think she will talk to Maura?" Frost asked.

"I hope so," Korsak answered. "Whatever this is, neither one of them can go on this way much longer."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

**May 5th**

"Jane," Angela decided to try again after they had finished the dessert Angela was seeking when she first came over. "I know you don't want to talk about this with me but I see the two of you together. Like tonight. How you are with her and how she is with you. I don't understand why you are so afraid to tell her that you love her."

Jane released a frustrated sigh. Some of this was her own fault. She never should have allowed herself to say anything to Angela about Maura. If she would have kept her mouth shut she might have been able to avoid conversations like this one. But she hadn't. So she couldn't. But then again, Jane pretty much wanted to blame alcohol for her inability to keep her mouth shut to her mother.

"Ma, if I thought for a second that Maura was open to being more than just friends with me I'd have done something about how I feel a long time ago. But, I happen to know for a fact that she is not open to it. And I can't lose her friendship."

"If you haven't ever told her how you feel then I don't understand why you think she isn't open to it. I've seen the way she looks at you Jane. I'm not blind."

"I'm not blind either," Jane said in an exasperated tone. _But I'm also not deaf_, she thought but didn't say. "Ma, trust me when I tell you that I know Maura isn't open to anything more than friendship. And if she thinks I want more she will back away from me and I can't have that."

The two Rizzoli women stared each other down in Maura's kitchen. If Angela was honest with herself she would admit that Jane was absolutely convinced that Maura wasn't open to the idea of a relationship. Angela may never understand the reason for Jane's belief but standing in that kitchen there was no mistaking the intensity in which Jane believed she would never be more to Maura than best friends.

For her part, Jane just couldn't bring herself to discuss the details of how she knew where Maura's heart was in terms of their relationship. It was too painful to fully recall to her mother. But she wasn't kidding when she said she was absolutely certain. Because she was. She also meant it when she thought she wasn't deaf. That was how she found out. A part of her had wished she never overheard that conversation.

_One year prior_

_Jane was just finishing up her reports from the arrest she and Frost had made the day prior. She was feeling rather proud of herself for finishing all her reports just a day after the completion of the case. To celebrate her success, she decided to wander down to the morgue to see if Maura wanted to get a drink at the Robber later that night._

_She rode the elevator down and was making her way to Maura's office when she heard Maura's voice. It had a detached almost exasperated tone to it and Jane couldn't help but believe Maura was on the phone with her mother. Jane had heard that tone from Maura before and Constance usually was the root cause of it. She slowed her walking pace not wanting to interrupt Maura's conversation._

_"Mother, my personal life is not a subject that is usually open for discussion." _

_Jane heard what Maura was saying and she didn't miss the frustration in Maura's tone. She felt bad. Jane was used to her mother butting into her life but Maura was not exactly used to having Constance ask her questions about much of anything._

_"I have nothing against that lifestyle. But it's just not for me. It's not who I am."_

_That statement both surprised and intrigued Jane. What kind of lifestyle was Maura even talking about? Jane had come to a complete stop just outside Maura's office at this point. She suddenly realized it was extremely rude to be eavesdropping on this conversation and she was about to walk away when she heard Maura's next response._

_"Friendship is all I have to offer. If that's not enough then I will find myself in the uncomfortable and unfortunate position of having to explain that it may be best if we don't see each other going forward."_

_Jane couldn't stop the catch in her breathing. Could they be talking about her? The words of Maura's end of the conversation floated through Jane's head. Lifestyle. Not who I am. Friendship is all I have to offer. Jane's heart sank. If Constance was asking about her and Jane this was not the answers she had wanted to hear from Maura._

_Jane was in love with Maura. She had been for a long time and she was even considering telling her at some point. But if Constance was asking Maura about their friendship, which many people have done before, she wasn't liking the direction the conversation was going. She stood frozen. Her last hope was that maybe Maura was referring to someone other than her._

_"Jane does not feel that way. And even if she does, she knows how I feel so I can only hope it won't be an issue in the future."_

_Jane's heart sank. She felt the rug being pulled out from under her. That sealed the deal. Jane had just listened to Maura tell her mother that all she would have to offer Jane was friendship. She took a deep breath turned around. Given what she heard she just couldn't face Maura at the moment. She quietly walked back towards the elevators trying not to let what she had just heard completely devastate her._

The memory of that conversation still made Jane shudder. And it happened over a year ago. Jane had avoided interactions with Maura for a few days after she heard that conversation. She hadn't wanted to be reminded of it. She thought maybe it was best not to see the ME anymore.

It was due to this conversation that Angela knew Jane had feelings for Maura. The night she heard Maura's conversation Jane got drunk. Real drunk. She had been smart enough to drink at home and not out in public but apparently she hadn't been smart enough not to answer her ringing phone when she was drunk.

She answered a call from Angela. Who, of course, figured out Jane was drunk. While Jane drank, drunk was never a state she allowed herself to get to unless something was wrong. So with hearing how intoxicated her daughter was Angela drove over to Jane's to see what was going on. The sight she had found scared her. Jane was barely conscious laying on her bed an empty bottle of Jack was lying next to her.

Somewhere in the midst of Angela attempting to take care of her Jane mumbled that she was in love with Maura but it could never be. Angela, more worried about Jane and alcohol poisioning than what she had said, put her to bed and watched over her all night. It was a good thing she was there. An hour after passing out she had gotten violently sick. Had Angela not been there, Jane might have had issues.

It was mid-morning before Angela tried to get real answers. Jane was horribly hung over and not up for much talking. Angela asked about what she meant by being in love with Maura. Jane couldn't think of anything to say to get out of it so she admitted to having feelings for her best friend. She then made Angela swear on the lives of any unborn grandchildren that she would never say a word to Maura about it. All she offered as a reason was that Maura didn't feel the same and it would scare her away.

Angela had reluctantly agreed. And, she had kept her word. She had never once told Maura about Jane's feelings or even asked Maura how she really felt about Jane. She had always been shaken by the desperate, fearful look Jane had on her face when she demanded that Angela never say anything. So she left it alone with Maura. But not with Jane.

Over the year, she would from time to time, just like tonight, broach the topic and try to see if Jane had backed off her intense desire not to tell Maura how she felt. Each and every time, just like tonight, Angela saw that same desperate fearful look in Jane's eyes and knew things hadn't changed. She may never understand why Jane believed what she believed but she couldn't bring herself to discuss any of this with Maura.

Maura, of course, noticed immediately that Jane seemed distant and unavailable after that conversation. She had tried to go up to Jane's desk to see if she wanted to have a drink that night only to be told Jane had left early. Something Jane never, ever did. She was worried Jane was getting sick. When her calls went unanswered and her text messages only received one word answers she knew something was wrong.

Maura left Jane alone for three days before showing up at her apartment demanding an explanation. Jane couldn't bring herself to confront Maura about what she heard. Plus, she had missed her friend. It had only been three days but Jane felt truly lost without Maura's presence in her life. So in that moment, with a hurt, worried and confused ME standing in her apartment, Jane knew it was better to have Maura in her life every day as a friend than to lose her completely. So, she decided. She would never tell Maura how she felt. They would just be friends.

She apologized to Maura for distancing herself from her. She lied and blamed having new nightmares about Hoyt as what was bothering her. Jane was never sure if Maura ever really believed her but she let the topic go and they resumed their daily interactions after that.

So that was Jane's life over the last year. Most days were good days. She got used to burying her feelings for Maura. Usually, she took a lot of comfort in the friend interactions she had with her. Movie nights, dinners, lazy Sundays and even, if she admitted, shopping outings seemed to be enough to keep Jane happy. Maura was a part of her life and while she would always want more, most days what she had was enough.

But there were times, days, when it was hard. Times where all she wanted to do was tell Maura how much she loved her. Days where she had a hard time controlling her urge to pull the ME into an embrace and kiss her. Those days were mercifully few and far between. But they existed. She tried to deal with them the best she could. Tried not to detach from Maura for fear of hurting the ME when it just wasn't her fault. But some days she was just a little quieter. Just a little distant. Sometimes looking at what she wanted but couldn't have just took too much energy to successfully manage.

But the alternative, not having Maura in her life at all, was just so much worse.

R&I

**May 6th**

Maura awoke fairly early on that morning but she awoke a little disoriented. For a moment she didn't know where she was. It took rolling over in her king size bed for her to fully grasp that she was in fact at home. The last thing she could recall from the night before was settling into the couch to watch a movie with Jane.

Jane.

She finished rolling over and expected to see the detective sleeping soundly next to her. It was pretty normal for late nights, especially movie nights, for the two to share a bed together. She had assumed that Jane had just stayed over from the previous night. But she was somewhat disappointed when she realized that Jane's side of the bed had not been slept in all night. The absence of Jane slightly confused the doctor.

Maura rolled and stretched trying to wake herself up. She remembered getting through about half of the movie and that was about it. Looking down she saw she was still wearing what she had on the night before. Again, that was unusual. Even if Jane had carried her up to bed, which by this point Maura was certain was what had occurred, Jane usually helped her change into actual pajamas instead of the t-shirt and yoga pants she was currently wearing.

Maura had found over the years of being friends with Jane that deviations from routine with Jane usually signaled something was wrong. In fact, most of the time it was Maura's best indication that something was bothering the detective.

Jane was not one to openly share or discuss her feelings or concerns. That had become apparent early on in their friendship. Maura was not extremely bothered by this once she figured out that Jane was pretty closed off to everyone with regards to her feelings. It wasn't personal.

If anything, Jane shared more with Maura than she did with anyone else in her life. Her family included. But grading that on a scale of open sharing just shouldn't be done. What Jane did share with Maura was limited and as far as Maura was concerned frequently censored.

Why and what caused that within Jane Maura had yet to figure out. But she was determined to do so at some point. She wanted her friend to feel as if she could share anything with her. Tell her anything. So Maura felt certain that if she could figure out why Jane kept herself closed off to people she might be able to get passed or around that and just get the brunette to realize she wasn't alone in the world and there were people who loved and cared about her.

Maura wasn't there yet but she kept trying. Almost on a daily basis. At some point, she was going to solve the complex puzzle that was Jane Rizzoli. It was going to happen. And she knew, at the core of who she was, getting through to Jane and getting that part of her would so be worth the effort and energy.

She knew it would be worth it because she saw how Jane was with her family and close friends. Fiercely loyal and protective. Anyone in Jane's inner circle knew without a shadow of a doubt that there wasn't anything Jane wouldn't do for them. And that included sacrificing injury or risking her life. So, if she was like that for people that she kept at arms length, Maura was beyond intrigued and fascinated with the prospect of experiencing the passion of Jane Rizzoli if she could just get passed that barrier. That wall that was always just there.

Maura sat up and got out of bed. Maybe Jane just fell asleep on the couch or in the guestroom. It would be out of character but there was the possibility. She grabbed her robe and headed out to see if Jane was anywhere in the house. A quick check of the guestroom found no evidence of having been used. And Jane was notorious for not making the bed after sleeping in the room.

Maura headed down the stairs and was greeted with sounds coming from the kitchen. A smile immediately crossed her face. Jane had stayed. She headed to the kitchen but wasn't greeted by her detective. Instead, it was Angela making coffee and reading the paper.

Maura had to hide her disappointment. "Good morning," she greeted Angela with the best smile she could offer up.

"Good morning, Maura. I didn't wake you did I?" asked the older woman.

Maura shook her head. "No, I was just waking up." Maura advanced across the kitchen and removed a coffee cup from the cupboard. "Jane didn't stay?" she asked and tried to hide her disappointment.

"No, she said she had to work this morning. After she put you to bed last night we had dessert but then she headed back to her place," Angela recalled the night before.

"I did fall asleep," Maura half smirked. "And it was my movie choice."

Both ladies smiled at each other and fell into a casual conversation about nothing of any importance.

"What are you doing today?" Angela asked.

Maura didn't have any plans and with Jane working on the new case she didn't feel like sitting around the house all day by herself. "I should probably do some work myself. Jane and Barry have that new case and there were two more this week. The lab is getting a little backed up."

Angela couldn't help but wonder if Jane hadn't caught a case just how much Maura would care if the lab was backed up. "Maura, you're off. You should keep those days off when you can. Both you and Jane work too hard and too much not to have a break from time to time."

"Normally I would agree with you but I really should go in for a few hours. I need to finish up with Jane's case from yesterday. I don't want my lab to be the cause of a delay in any active murder investigation." Maura couldn't help but notice the slight look of disappointment on Angela's face. "However, I'm fairly certain I won't need to work tomorrow so I was wondering if you'd like to go shopping with me tomorrow? We could go early enough not to interrupt Sunday dinner."

Angela beamed at the idea of getting to spend time with Maura and go shopping. It was never anything Jane would do willingly with her. "I would love to," answered Angela now content to get some of Maura's time.

Maura finished her coffee and chatted with Angela. She then went upstairs to get cleaned up and head into the station. She was sure most of the labs were back on Jane's case so she knew she would have some much needed information for her best friend.

R&I

"There's still just too much we don't know here," Jane sighed with frustration to Frost. "All we have is Franklin's ID and the fact that she was at least seen Saturday at Jake's. But we don't know where else she went. When she disappeared. Who the three people she was with at Jake's are." Jane knew there were just too many holes.

"I'm trying facial recognition for the three others from the video Slim made for us but the image quality isn't good and I'm just not sure we are going to get anything," Frost admitted.

"The extent of her injuries went beyond what I first assessed," came from Maura as she walked into the bullpen with a thick file in her hand. "Jane, I haven't seen too many cases like this one before."

Jane was surprised to even see Maura. It wasn't her weekend to work and Jane had figured she wouldn't see her again until Sunday dinner. "What do you mean?" she asked as she took the file to review it.

"Cause of death was the gunshot wound but it is unlikely she would have survived the beating she took had she not been shot. You saw the abrasions and contusions at the scene but the autopsy showed the full extent of her injuries. She was beaten. She had fractures to both tibias, her left femur, both radius and ulnas as well as fractures to seven of her ribs. Three were fractured in multiple locations. She also had damage to her spinal cord with significant displacement of her T2 and T3 vertebrae."

Jane looked at the photos and read through the report. "She was tortured," Jane couldn't help but say out loud. She handed the file over to Frost so he could review the preliminaries. "Sexual assault?"

"Yes although I was unable recover any DNA or fluids. It appears as though the attacker wore a condom." She started to say something else but stopped.

Jane caught the hesitation. "What?"

"I found traces of a bleach like substance all over her body. There's a significant chance that the attacker either submerged or washed her down with the bleach to eliminate evidence."

"Did any forensic clues survive?" Jane knew Maura had mentioned that there was particulates under the fingernails of Franklin.

"I was able to pull some skin from under her fingernails but the lab report is not ready for that yet. Labs are also still out on any of the fibers recovered from the body. I'm sorry. The lab is short staffed and there's a bit of a backup."

Jane nodded. She knew Maura would make sure she got results as quickly as possible. "Tox screen?"

"She had a blood alcohol level of 0.06 and there were opiates and barbiturates in her system. I'm running a hair sample analysis to see if the drug use was long term."

"Were you able to narrow down time of death?" Frost asked.

"The window is a little bigger than I would like but the outdoor exposure made it hard for me to narrow it down with any level of certainty. You can factor her death to be somewhere between 3-4 days prior to her being found."

"So sometime between Monday and Tuesday?" Jane asked.

Maura nodded. "I wish I could pinpoint it with more certainty but I just can't."

"That's alright," Jane responded. It gave them a time frame to help sort out what may have happened. She turned to Frost. "So we need to figure out what happened with her after she left Jake's Saturday night."

"I've run her history looking for credit cards but she doesn't have any. She does use a debit card for purchase transactions however there's no activity since Friday morning. We have a request in for her cell phone records but I don't think we will see those until Monday. I tried to ping her phone but it doesn't appear to be turned on or the battery has gone dead."

"So again we are back to square one," Jane said with a sigh. She hated it when she she out of leads on a case. Especially when the case wasn't even a full day old.

The address they had for Franklin turned out to be a dead end. She hadn't stayed at that address in over six months. None of the neighbors knew where she went and none seemed to be very familiar with who she was.

They needed a break in this case. Maybe they would get lucky and the DNA pulled from under her fingernails would generate a hit in CODIS. Jane was running the MO through ViCAP as well. Maybe she would find similar cases to this one. Or maybe there would be something with the fiber evidence from her clothes that would help lead them to Franklin's attacker.

Jane took the file from Frost and looked to Maura. "Thank you," she said with a smile. She was pretty sure Maura had come in to help with her investigation and she wanted to make sure Maura knew she appreciated it. "You should really get out of here now. You are supposed to be off today."

Maura smiled but didn't agree to leave. Instead she merely replied, "I'll bring up the rest of the lab reports when they are ready," she said and turned to head back down to the morgue. Jane needed her and she wasn't going to simply head home.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

**May 12th**

It had been a week since they found the body of Kelly Franklin and Jane and Frost were nowhere in their investigation. The trail had run cold. Saturday night at Jake's was the last place they could put Kelly Franklin. They still had been unable to identify the three other people she was at Jake's with. They could not find where Franklin had actually been staying nor had they managed to locate anyone who seemed to know Franklin.

Her cell phone records did not yield any help. She hadn't made a call out in over a week prior to her death. Those calls traced back to several businesses but none of which was useful in identifying a more current address for Franklin. The only incoming calls traced back to another dead end. A disposable cell phone Frost couldn't trace.

They were coming up short on forensic evidence too. They had the bullet from Franklin's gunshot wound but the ballistics did not match anything on file. They had DNA from under Franklin's fingernails but no match in CODIS was found. They had video of Franklin with three other people a few days before she was killed but facial recognition was not yielding any helpful information. And Jane's ViCAP search did not yield any similar cases.

The case was growing cold and there didn't seem to be anything Jane could do about it.

"Vanilla!" the familiar and overly flirtatious voice sounded throughout the bullpen.

No matter how hard she tried she couldn't stop the smile that spread across her face when she heard his voice. Granted Rondo was a little over the top sometimes but he was an excellent source of information for Jane and what mattered more was that she considered him a friend.

"Rondo, please don't holler across the bullpen," she admonished the man as he approached her desk. "What do you need?" she asked as she kicked out a chair next to her desk inviting the man to take a seat and talk with her.

"Can't I just stop bye to say hi to my favorite Five-O?" he asked but with a smile on his face. "Who's lookin all kinds of fine if I do say so myself." He had noticed the gesture with the chair and he was touched. She was always open to seeing him and spending some of her time with him.

"Thank you," she said at his compliment. She had a feeling she was grinning like an idiot. The man was beyond unabashed with his flirtations with her. They were harmless though. "And while I appreciate that you were thinking about me you usually don't come all the way into the station unless there is something you have for me or something you need from me. So which is it?" she asked.

Rondo had taken the seat Jane had offered. The look on his face turned suddenly serious and he looked around for a minute to make sure he was just talking to Jane. "I hear you are looking for information about Kelly Franklin."

Jane perked up. Rondo was always an excellent source of street information. If he had come inside the station looking for Jane she knew he had something good for her.

"I'm looking for anything at all," she admitted. They were nowhere and she would take any help she could get.

"I know you are looking to ID the people she was with at Jake's," Rondo started. "I can help you with the other girl. No one seems to know the men though."

Jane wasn't at all surprised that Rondo seemed to be fully aware of some of her investigation information. He always seemed to have a good idea of what Jane did or didn't know. "Who's the other girl?"

"Her name is Melissa Scott," Rondo said. "She's a lot like Kelly. Young and pretty. New to the streets."

"How do you know her?" Jane asked.

"I don't really know her. Not like I knew Kelly. But I know of her. I've seen her on the streets. Seen her with Kelly before." He thought about Kelly. She was young and lost. He wished he could have helped her out more.

Jane didn't realize he knew the victim. "Rondo, I'm sorry. I didn't know you knew Kelly. I'm sorry for what happened to her. You know I'll do everything I can to find the person responsible for her death." Jane reached out and placed her hand on Rondo's shoulder.

"If anyone can figure this out, it's you," he said quietly.

"Any idea where Melissa lives?" Jane asked. If she could find and talk to Melissa maybe she could shed some light on who the guys were from Jake's.

Rondo nodded and let his mood lighten a bit. "Would I ever come here with just half information for my detective sweet thing?" he asked with a cocky smile.

Jane returned his smile and even snickered. She dug into her pocket and pulled out some money for her CI. "You have never let me down."

Rondo looked down at the money but shook his head. "No, this one's personal." He didn't want money. He just wanted to help.

Jane made a show of pulling back the money from his hand. She was still going to give it to him. She would just slip it into his pocket before he stood up to leave. It was a trick she had learned with him a few years back.

They chatted for a few more minutes and Rondo gave Jane Melissa's current location. As he stood up to leave she slipped the money into his pocket and walked him out.

As she walked Rondo out of the station thanking him for coming in with his information he looked at her. "Vanilla, Kelly was a sweet kid. Troubled. Lost. But sweet. You need to find the guy that did this to her," he said.

Jane nodded. "We're trying Rondo. We're trying."

When she returned Frost was back in the bullpen and smiled his greeting to her. "What's up?" he asked.

"Rondo knows who the female with Franklin from Saturday night is. Melissa Scott," Jane answered.

Frost pulled out his iPad and hit a few buttons. Running the name he quickly found her in the system. Scott had an arrest record. Twice arrested for prostitution. Otherwise there wasn't much information. "I've got her," he told Jane.

"Rondo had an address for her. Let's go," she said as she grabbed her jacket from the back of her chair.

R&I

Frost pulled up to the address they had been given by Rondo. It appeared to be an abandoned warehouse. Frost looked over at Jane as they got out of the car. "Not exactly my idea of 'Home Sweet Home'."

Jane shrugged, "My guess is that this building houses several transients. But it's a roof over their heads. Sometimes that's all that's needed."

It was fairly common for street girls to seek shelter in the abandon warehouses in the Back Bay. In most cases, they usually settled in as a group. There was something to be said about safety in numbers.

Jane and Frost headed into the warehouse and began to look around. It was clear that multiple people had stayed here from time to time but for the moment there didn't appear to be anyone around. Jane and Frost advanced slowly from room to room looking for signs of inhabitants but not finding anyone.

They had cleared about two thirds of the building and Jane was starting to feel discouraged. Maybe Scott had moved on by this point. If she had been staying here with Franklin there was a chance she didn't feel safe continuing to stay here without her.

They entered the second to last room in the warehouse and finally had room for some hope. This room looked more recently occupied than the previous rooms. There was even a mattress on the ground in the corner. Looking at the mattress Jane could tell there was someone laying on the bed.

"Boston police," Jane announced as she slowly inched towards the bed.

At first both she and Frost thought the person was simply sleeping. But as they moved closer and saw no movement from the form on the bed they both quickly figured out that the form on the bed was no longer alive. Jane walked around the mattress and gently pulled back the blanket.

"Call the tech team," Jane said to Frost. "And call Maura."

They had found Melissa Scott. Unfortunately for them she was in exactly the same shape as Kelly Franklin had been in.

R&I

"The injuries appear consistent with those found on Kelly Franklin," Maura stated as she turned up to look at Jane. "I'll have to do a complete examination but the GSW appears to be consistent with a 9 millimeter. There are also multiple contusions and abrasions all over her body. From what I can feel she had fractures to her ulna, femur and tibia. Xrays will determine the extent of the broken bones." Maura paused looking down at the body laid out on the bed. "I won't know about sexual assault until she goes back to the lab and she also has significant bruising around the base of her skull."

Jane looked at Maura. "So she was beat just like Kelly Franklin." It was a statement more said out loud than to anyone specifically.

Maura chose to answer. "Yes. Both ladies appear to have gone through similar traumas prior to their deaths."

"Time of death?" Frost asked.

"I can't be certain without further testing but based on lividity and liver temperature I would say she has been dead for about 24 hours."

That was a better time frame than what they had for Franklin. They were finding this guy's victims faster. Jane was absolutely sure their suspect was the same guy for both murders. She was sure ballistics would match the bullet pulled from Franklin. Given the nature of the abuse, it seemed logical to assume it was the same guy.

"Rape kit, tox screen and a rush on any DNA you can recover," she requested quietly from Maura.

"Of course," Maura said confirming that she would address those as quickly as she could.

"Maura?" Jane asked.

"Yeah?"

"Is it me or do you detect a hint of bleach too?" she asked. She was hoping that maybe she was wrong. Bleach would mean it was unlikely any DNA survived on Scott's body from a sexual assault.

"You're not wrong. She also appears to have been washed or submerged in a bleach like substance at some point. Also, I can not detect any tissue under her fingernails. I won't know for certain until I can run tests but I didn't see anything. I'm sorry Jane," Maura could sense Jane's growing frustration.

Jane nodded and stepped back to survey the scene. "He's getting better at this," she muttered mostly to herself. Body hidden indoors instead of outdoors. The use of bleach again. No skin tissue under fingernails. This guy seemed to be learning from his mistakes. Jane looked at Frost. "Who knows when she would have been found and reported if we hadn't been coming here to look for her."

Frost nodded. The transient population in Boston had a habit of not reporting crimes to the police. Including death. Melissa Scott could have remained where she was found for quite some time before anyone would have informed the police.

"Jane, it can't be a coincidence that Scott and Franklin are both dead. They were seen together a few days before Franklin was killed and now they both are dead. This looks like the work of the same person. We need to figure out who those two guys from the video from Jake's are."

Jane could only nod. She, too, was convinced that the two guys they could not yet identify would be the key to solving these murders. But that appeared easier said than done. They had been looking for the two men for over a week now and still had no idea who either one was.

Jane stepped back a few feet from the body on the bed and took in the entire crime scene. She let her eyes slowly trace every detail of the immediate area. The room didn't offer too much insight. The mattress was in a corner on the floor. There were two pillows, a blanket and the sheets on the bed. All of which were being processed and tagged as evidence.

In the opposite corner of the room was a duffle bag with a few changes of clothes. If the wardrobe belonged to Scott she didn't have too many different outfits to wear. Next to the duffle bag were some toiletry items including toothpaste, toothbrush, deodorant and shampoo. Jane had Frost check and the warehouse had working water but no electricity. Scott would have been able to at least wash up in the warehouse but she didn't have access to hot water.

Next to the bed was an industrial size flashlight. Jane was sure Scott used that to navigate around the warehouse at night. As her eyes continued to survey the scene she realized something. "I wonder where..." she muttered to herself before looking up at Frost. "Frost?"

"Yeah Jane," he answered.

"Have we recovered any personal items?" she asked.

Frost looked around at the CSRU team and then over at the table they were placing items being marked and tagged as evidence. "Her toiletries and clothes," he started but Jane cut him off.

"No, not the day to day items. Personal items. ID, cell phone, books, photos. Anything?" she was letting her eyes rescan the room again.

"No," Frost answered. "We haven't found anything that personal yet."

"I wonder where she hid them," Jane said and took even a few more steps back. Both Frost and Maura looked at Jane with a questioning look on their faces. Jane attempted to explain. "When I did a stretch undercover for Vice I got to know some of the girls pretty well. All of them had personal items they kept with them. Each girl had something different. Photos of family. Letters or cards that meant something to them. Jewelry from a parent or grandparent. A favorite book. Something. Something deeply personal that they would use to remind themselves of a different or better time in their life. Something that would remind them that they hadn't always had to do the things they were doing.

"Each of the girls would show me what their 'things' were at some point while I was undercover. While what the girls kept varied, all of them did virtually the same thing. Wherever they slept or called 'home' for lack of a better word, they had a hiding place for these items. Some place close for easy access but hidden so no john, pimp or another girl would be able to find them and take them."

Frost now understood what Jane was saying. He, too, stepped back and surveyed the room in the warehouse. Both detectives were now looking for anything that may be a hiding place for personal items. Nothing immediately jumped out at either detective. And then Jane had a thought.

"Maura, are you ready to sign off on the removal of the body?" Jane asked.

"She's ready to go at any time. Why?" Maura asked.

"Can we get her on a gurney and off the mattress? I'd like to look under it if we can."

Maura nodded. She indicated for two of the men from the coroner's office to come forward and prepare Scott to be placed on a gurney. While she oversaw this Jane continued to look around search the room trying to make sure she hadn't missed anything else. After a few minutes, the body of Melissa Scott was being loaded into the coroner's van.

Once removed, Jane and Frost carefully flipped the mattress up on it's side exposing the flooring underneath the mattress. Both detectives and Maura looked at the floor underneath where the mattress had been. It took a minute but Maura finally noticed a change in the color of the grout around one of the flooring tiles. Upon investigation, Jane was able to pry up the tile. They had found Scott's hiding spot.

"Nice catch Jane," Frost said as Jane started to remove the contents.

They found a few photographs of people Jane assumed were family members. A 16th birthday card from 'Grandma' and a journal. At the sight of the journal Jane couldn't help but smile. She flipped to the last entry of the journal and breathed a sigh of relief. The journal was somewhat current.

"Her last entry is dated May 1st," Jane said. That was right around the time Kelly Franklin may have been killed.

Maybe, just maybe, they would be able to find a few answers in Scott's journal.

R&I

Maura followed the body back to the station to start the autopsy of Scott. With nothing else to supervise at the warehouse, Jane and Frost started to head outside. Frost was trying to locate any listed next of kin to attempt a notification but he hadn't been able to track one down as of yet. He was flipping through scenes on his iPad as they walked out towards the car and didn't notice Jane suddenly stop once she had walked completely outside of the warehouse. He practically ran right into her.

"Damn Jane," he said just avoiding a collision. "A little warning next time would be appreciated." He hadn't really stopped to ask why she had stopped suddenly. That didn't occur to him until he noticed that she hadn't moved an inch since she had stopped. "What?" he asked her now confused.

"Casually look up in two seconds," Jane said under her breath but refusing to make eye contact with Frost.

Frost understood what she meant. She wanted him to look at the crowd formed outside the police line but not let his head snap up and stare. Casually and slowly he shifted himself so he could appear to still be reviewing his iPad but still able to see into the crowd.

"There are a lot of curious onlookers here right now," Jane said now also trying to play off that she was more interested in what Frost was reviewing on his iPad than the crowd itself. Both Jane and Frost had worked several cases in which the suspect was compelled to visit the crime scene or watch as the police conducted their investigation. There was a possibility that their suspect was amongst the crowd now looking on as the police continued to attend to the crime scene inside the warehouse.

"Want me to get Jeff to get crowd shots?" Frost asked.

"Please," Jane answered. "Go talk with him. Make sure he stays out of sight when he is taking them. He may even be able to shoot from the window and not head outside at all. I'll wait for you at the car."

Frost nodded his understanding. "Who knows. Maybe we will get lucky," he added before turning around and heading back to find Jeff to ask for the crowd photos.

"Maybe," Jane said to herself as she made her way to the car to wait for Frost.

R&I

_I need a break! Please tell me you will be done in time for a movie. J_

Maura read the text message from Jane and smiled. She knew Jane was frustrated with the state her current case was in and that it wasn't going to help that another body had been found. She typed her response.

_I only have about 30 more minutes of work I need to do. So yes for a movie. M_

She had finished the autopsy for Melissa Scott. She needed to file just a few reports and check on the lab but she had done all she could for Jane's case at the moment. The final results wouldn't be ready until morning.

_Now I'm jealous. I have at least an hour still but not much more than that. My place at 7? J_

Again, Maura smiled. They had fallen into just a comfortable pattern. Friday movie nights seemed to rotate between her house and Jane's apartment. Whoever picked the movie seemed to be the host for movie night. Looking at Jane's text again Maura had an idea.

_7 is fine. Don't worry about dinner. I'll bring something. M_

Jane had had a long and frustrating week. Maura had an idea about how to make their night just a little bit better. She put her phone down and hurried to finish the rest of her work. Now that she knew what she wanted to do she had things she needed to pick up.

R&I

Jane took just a little longer at the station than she had wanted to. But Frost had found an address for Melissa Scott's grandmother in the journal they had found and the notification had taken about thirty minutes longer than she thought it would.

The grandmother was nice but couldn't offer up much information on what Scott had been doing over the last few years. Scott had apparently had a falling out with her parents that was bitter and resulted in Scott leaving home when she was seventeen. Scott's grandmother said Scott would check in with her from time to time but never wanted to discuss what she was doing or where she was staying. As it was, the grandmother hadn't seen Scott in almost a year.

The journal didn't exactly offer up the magic answer Jane was hoping for. If she was honest with herself she would admit that she had wanted to find an entry with a specific name of their suspect clearly written. But that's not what they found. There wasn't anything that directly spelled out who may have killed her or Franklin.

But that wasn't to say that the journal wasn't useful. In fact, they had found several entries that at least offered up some new leads for them to follow-up on. Scott had done a good job of documenting where she had been in the days before her last entry. There were mentions of Franklin as well. Frost had compiled a list of places they could visit starting the next day to see if there was anything more they could learn about the activities of both Franklin and Scott in the days leading up to both their murders.

Putting her key into the lock she knew she was cutting it close. It was 6:57 and Maura was set to be over at 7:00. She hadn't wanted to push the night back and she knew she would make it home in time but she thought she'd have more than a three minute window. But, she was home and would at least have time to change into more comfortable clothes before Maura arrived. Thankfully Maura was bringing dinner. The only thing she felt bad about was that she was going to have to delay dinner so she could take Jo for a quick walk. But she knew Maura would understand.

As the key finally turned the lock and she could open the door she was in no way prepared for what she walked into. In fact, it stopped her dead in her tracks having only taken a few steps through her front door.

"Wow," was all she could mutter.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

**May 12th**

Still shocked at what she was seeing Jane continued to stand in the doorway. She didn't even really register the fact that Jo was jumping on her leg attempting to greet her owner after a hard day's work. "Maura?" Jane said after a few moments.

Maura simply smiled. She had wanted to do something special for Jane given the type of week Jane was having. So when she offered to bring dinner over it was because she wanted to do something a little more than just their typical take out Chinese or pizza. Jane had earned something a little better than that this week.

So after she finished the last of her reports and did a quick check on the lab, she took off to get things ready for dinner. Part of her wished she had decided to do something special for Jane sooner. With just a little more time she would have cooked herself. But, she figured that this would do in a pinch.

She had placed a carryout order from Jane's favorite Italian restaurant. A restaurant that didn't prepare carryout meals. But the owner knew Jane and had met Maura on a few occasions and when Maura called and explained that the meal was for Jane, the owner had the chef make an exception and had created a dinner of Jane's favorite dishes. After Maura picked up the food she headed over to Jane's apartment.

She had a key. They each had keys to the other's place. Normally she never entered Jane's apartment without Jane knowing about it but she had wanted the dinner to be a surprise so this once she just let herself in. She was immediately greeted by Jo when she entered. She loved Jo and Jo always appeared to be happy to see Maura. After securing the dinner in Jane's kitchen Maura took Jo for a walk so Jane wouldn't have to do it when she got home.

Once Jo was taken care of, Maura went about setting the table for dinner. She couldn't help but smile when she did this. She realized how quickly she had gotten out of the habit of eating at a table when she ate with Jane. When they first met and started spending time together Maura couldn't believe Jane could eat dinner in front of the TV on the couch.

Maura had always had her meals while sitting at a table. But slowly, Jane seemed to have broken Maura of that habit. While Jane quickly gave up the couch for dinner, Maura gave up the dining room table. They both found a compromise and settled in for eating at either Jane or Maura's kitchen island while sitting on bar stools. As she set Jane's actual table Maura couldn't even remember the last time they had shared a meal at this table.

Maura resisted the urge to set a formal place setting. She knew how much extra utensils annoyed Jane. Again, she found herself smiling at this. Jane was a one fork, one spoon, one knife kind of woman. Jane told Maura once that anything more than that was just someone trying to show off. So as Maura pulled out silverware to set the table she gave each of them one fork, one spoon and one knife. As a last touch, Maura pulled out two candles and lit them after placing them in the center of the table. It all felt right. It was for Jane. And Maura liked that notion.

"You've had a long, tough week. Today couldn't have helped any. So I thought we'd do something a little more than pizza for dinner. I hope you don't mind that I let myself in," Maura said with a smile.

Jane finally recovered and continued into her apartment. "You know you are welcome here anytime Maur. That's why you have a key." She was trying to not to let the situation overwhelm her and so she tried to act as casual as possible. "You didn't have to do all of this," she said.

"I know. But I wanted to do something special for you," Maura said with a warm smile. One Jane easily returned.

"I, umm, I'm running a little behind. Let me get changed and take Jo for a quick walk and then we can eat. Ok?" Jane asked.

"I already took care of Jo," Maura said. "So you just go get changed and then we can eat." Maura had walked towards Jane and placed her hand gently on Jane's back as she answered her.

Jane wasn't ready for that and felt a shiver run through her entire body. She was thankful that she still had on her blazer as she was sure the extra layer of clothes was the only thing that prevented Maura from detecting her reaction to the touch. Trying to project nothing but calmness she smiled. "Alright, I'll be out in a minute."

Jane retreated into her bedroom and shut the door letting her body almost collapse against it. She wasn't sure why Maura's gesture had such an impact on her. Or maybe she did know. She knew it was a kind, simple gesture of a friend but Jane had, for a brief moment, let herself get lost in Maura's kindness.

She cursed at herself for letting her mind wander. She could easily blame the setting. It wasn't everyday that she walked into her place to find the table set for dinner, candles lit and the woman of her dreams awaiting her. She really couldn't blame herself for the reaction she had. But it needed to be stopped.

This wasn't a romantic dinner. This was just dinner. As friends. Nothing else. Jane chastised herself for a few more seconds until she was sure that any romantic notions were finally out of her head. After another few seconds she pulled herself away from her door and moved to grab some clothes to change into. She pulled out a pair of sweats and a t-shirt and changed. Taking one last deep breath she assured herself that she was fine and she went back out to join her friend for dinner and a movie.

R&I

"So," Jane announced as she exited her bedroom to rejoin Maura in the living room. "What are we having for dinner?"

"I didn't have time to cook anything so it's not a complete break from takeout. But I did decided we needed something better than pizza," Maura answered. "It's carryout from La Campania," she said and didn't even try to hide her smile.

"Carryout? They don't do carryout," she said surprised that Maura pulled this off.

"They do if I speak to the owner and mention the dinner was a surprise for you," she said.

Jane couldn't believe what Maura had done. She was touched. She picked up the bottle of wine she knew Maura had brought over with her and poured them both a glass. "Maura," she said and paused. "Thank you." There was nothing but sincerity in her tone. She really did need something like this after the week she had.

Maura smiled. The dinner had the effect on Jane she had hoped. "You're welcome," she answered back. "Now, let's eat before it gets cold."

The food was excellent and the conversation was quite enjoyable. By the time dessert was served each was completely relaxed. After dessert Jane told Maura to head into the living room and she would finish the clean up and be in shortly. There wasn't much that needed to be done so Maura carried both her wine and Jane's into the living room. Jane loaded up the dishwater and put the leftovers in her fridge and followed behind carrying the bottle of wine to refill each glass.

R&I

"So, what category?" Maura asked not even sure what movie they were set to watch.

Jane couldn't help the grin. "Sci-fi," she answered. She had picked up the 1978 version of Superman with Christopher Reeves. She could have counted this as her guilty pleasure but opted to label it sci-fi. She figured as much as Maura might poke holes at the science behind the notion of the Man of Steel she may enjoy it simply because it was also sort of a love story although that story arc was more defined in Superman II.

Jane started the movie and they both took their usual spots on Jane's couch. Jane let Maura snuggle up right into her and she relaxed as soon as she felt Maura get comfortable. They both sat quietly enjoying the movie for about the first third of it. Jane was surprised that Maura wasn't asking questions or pointing out scientific inaccuracies but she hoped it was because the ME was enjoying the movie.

"Jane?" Maura asked quietly as the movie continued to play.

"Yeah," Jane answered back not turning her attention from the movie.

Maura hesitated for a minute. She had wanted to ask Jane something but didn't know if she should interrupt the movie or even bring up the topic.

Jane sensed Maura's hesitation. She turned now to look at Maura. "What?" she asked softly.

"I was just wondering something. Nevermind though. We can just watch the rest of the movie," she answered. Now maybe wasn't the best time to bring up what she had wanted to ask.

Jane wasn't going to let her off the hook that easily. She grabbed the remote and hit pause stopping the movie. She turned her full attention to Maura. Whatever it was it had to be important. Maura didn't usually hesitate to ask her anything. "What?" she said sweetly this time.

"Earlier today when you were talking about the personal things the prostitutes used to keep with them. Things that reminded them of who they were or better times?" she started.

"Yeah," Jane answered remembering her explanation to both Frost and Maura at the warehouse. But she had no idea what Maura was asking or what she was getting at. "What about them?"

"I was just wondering if you kept anything with you? Like the girls did." she asked.

Jane was surprised by the question. "No, I didn't. But I wasn't on the street Maura. I was just undercover. I didn't want to bring anything with me that someone could use to identify who I really was," she answered.

"Oh," Maura responded. That seemed to make complete sense. "I just thought you maybe kept some personal things like you explained today. I wondered what they might be."

Jane was quiet for a minute. But then, she wiggled her way out of Maura's hold and walked into her bedroom without explaining herself to a now confused Maura. She returned a few moments later with an old wooden box in her hand. She sat back down on the couch and turned to Maura.

"I didn't have anything with me when I was undercover but that's not to say I don't have my items," she explained to Maura as she handed over the box to Maura. Maura took it but hesitated to open the box. She hadn't meant for Jane to feel like she had to show her anything personal. She had just been curious. Jane sensed her hesitation. "It's ok, open it."

Maura slowly removed the lid from the box not knowing what she might find. Once the lid was off Maura took out items one by one. She started with an old, faded photograph. She knew immediately that the little girl in the photo was Jane. She looked up to ask.

"My grandmother," Jane supplied the answer to the unasked question. "I was four when that was taken. But it was always my favorite picture of the two of us together. I've always kept it close to me. There are more photos of us together but usually someone else was in them. Frankie. Tommy. Ma. Pop. A random cousin or Aunt. This one was just us. I think that's why I always liked it so much."

Maura looked at the picture again and smiled. Jane had told her a few times how close she had been with her grandmother. They both looked very happy in the picture. She pulled out a crucifix next and again looked up at Jane for an explanation if she was willing.

"Also my grandmother's. It was the only thing from her estate I ever took or even wanted. She wore it all the time. I don't remember ever seeing her without it. I could never get myself to wear it but I keep it. Anytime I'm really missing her, I'll pull it out and hold it and, I don't know, it always makes me feel better. Like she's watching over me or something."

Maura next pulled out another old, faded photograph. This one she didn't need an explanation for. It was of Jane and her brothers. "How old were you here?" she asked.

Jane smiled. "Twelve. Frankie was ten and Tommy was seven. We had just come inside from spending the entire day outside playing in the snow. We did everything. We built a snowman. We had a snowball fight. We went to McGregor's Hill and went sledding. It had to be one of the funnest days I've ever had.

"I'm not sure how we avoided frostbite. We were virtually frozen when Ma finally got us to come inside. She took this right after we had peeled ourselves out of our wet clothes and managed to get into our pajamas. It was just a really good day."

Maura looked down at the photo and couldn't help but feel a little envious. She didn't have those kind of childhood memories. The happiest times she could recall usually surrounded the few times her father or mother actually took an interest in her or did something with her. But those moments were not often for Maura as a child.

The next thing Maura pulled out of the box she thought she knew the story behind. But she held it up to Jane and waited for her to give her the details.

"That's a ticket stub from the very first Red Sox game my father ever took me to," she said with a smile that just lit up her whole face. "I was seven and I'd been begging Pop to take me to Fenway for two straight summers. Ma kept insisting that I was too young to pay attention for an entire game so she didn't want me to go until she thought I was ready to sit through the whole thing.

"I thought for sure that I was ready the year before. I begged and begged all summer but to no end. I tried to explain to her that if I could sit for an entire game on TV with Pop then I should be able to actually go to Fenway. Logical, right?"

Maura smiled and answered. "Perfectly logical for a six year old."

Jane snickered, "Now ask me if I could actually sit and watch an entire game with Pop that summer I was six."

Maura giggled, "I take it you had some challenges?"

"I wouldn't admit to them. I felt I did really good at watching the games. But, it was never for the entire game. I have to admit I faded in and out after about the fourth inning. I'd run for beer for Pop. More chips for me. Lots of bathroom breaks. I'd talk to Frankie or Tommy. Ma was right, at six I wasn't ready.

"But then, the next summer I remember settling into the couch with Pop and we watched the entire home opener. I was so excited to watch the game I didn't even think about if I was sitting through the whole thing or not. But I did. And Ma noticed. Pop got us these tickets the very next day. I had to wait about two weeks but it was so worth the wait.

"Maura, it was amazing. Every time I get a chance to see a game at Fenway there's always this moment when I feel like I'm that seven year old all over again. The sights and sounds just all take me back to that very first time. It was just me and Pop. The Sox lost. But for once I really didn't care. I got to go to Fenway and that's all that mattered."

Maura knew of Jane's passion for Boston sports but she never realized that her love of the Red Sox had started at such a young age. She moved to the second to last item in the box and held it up with a smile.

It was a small 'Detective' badge. It was shaped almost like Jane's actual badge and had probably been shiny at one point but years of use and simply age had faded it. Maura held it out in the palm of her hand. "So, you were sure of your calling at a young age?" she asked with a smile.

The smile on Jane's face continued. "I was. But I didn't keep that all these years because I needed a reminder of what I wanted to be when I grew up," she answered.

"Why did you keep this then?" Maura asked now even more curious.

"That," Jane said pointing to the small badge, "is a victory trophy."

Maura looked at Jane confused. "Victory trophy?"

Jane quietly snickered, "Yep, I won a very important battle."

Maura just looked at Jane and waited for her to explain what she meant. "This may surprise you Maura but I was very much a tomboy when I was a kid."

Maura couldn't help the burst of laughter that escaped her when Jane said that. "Sorry," she said sheepishly and wanted Jane to continue.

"I know, shocker. But, anyway, I was never into the 'girly' things all my cousins used to do much to my mother's dismay. None of that ever interested me. I wanted to be out with the boys playing baseball or football. I wanted to be racing bikes with my brothers, playing in the mud and getting dirty. The traditional things labeled for girls couldn't compare to what all the boys in the neighborhood got to do.

"It drove my mother crazy that I wouldn't do the more traditional girl activities. I never wore dresses or let her do up my hair. Not without a fight anyway. Every summer she would enroll me in these dance classes which lasted as long as it took for the dance teacher to explain about the need for tights and dresses and not sweats and a t-shirt. Once that would happen Ma and I would fight until she would finally give up and let me quit. She tried everything she could think of to get me involved in girl activities and I fought her tooth and nail to get out of every single one of them.

"We did that battle for several years. I think she kept thinking that at some point I'd just magically wake up one morning and be this girl who liked pink and dolls and who would suddenly want to do the clothes and makeup thing. But it was never going to happen. But, every summer she would try a new dance class and we'd start the battle all over again.

"When I was in fifth grade we were asked to the do the 'What I want to be when I grow up' project. Even back then I knew I wanted to be a cop. Cops and robbers was always my favorite thing to play with my brothers and the boys in the neighborhood. We chased each other around with our toy guns and plastic handcuffs. Our front porch even used to serve as the neighborhood jail most of the time.

"So, I did this whole project on the police and why I thought it was the best job in the world. In the end it came down to the fact that I thought the job was about helping others. Helping the ones who couldn't seem to help themselves. It was a pretty good project for an eleven year old. But what I didn't know was that my teacher shared the project with my mother at the end of the year parent/teacher conference. I'll never be absolutely sure of what in that project finally won my mother over but something did.

"On the first official day of summer my mother came into my room with a present. Naturally, I assumed it was going to be her first attempt at getting me into some sort of dance class again so I wasn't really eager to open the gift. It was the first day of summer and I thought we are already going to be starting our annual fighting.

"But instead of some girly dance stuff, I found a whole law enforcement set. A new cap gun and those caps that made the really loud noise. New handcuffs, plastic, but still new. A new notebook and a pen labeled 'Detective' for taking notes at our crime scenes. And this badge. I couldn't believe it. Nothing frilly. Nothing pink. Ma had gotten me this great new cop playset to start off my summer.

"All she said to me was that she believed I could be anything I wanted to be in life. She said the city of Boston would be lucky to have someone like me out there protecting it and that she loved me. After that, she never tried to put me in another dance class or really push me to do anything I didn't want to do.

"So yeah, that badge is my victory trophy. And not a victory over dance classes and dresses. It was more than that. It was a victory in the sense that my mother finally saw me for who I was instead of some notion of who she thought I should be. That badge was her way of showing me that not only did she see me but she loved what she saw."

Maura sat staring at the badge in her hand. She had to blink away the formation of a few tears that were threatening to form. She was overwhelmed by the amount of personal information Jane was sharing with her. Jane was normally more reserved with her emotions and personal life but going through the items in the box she seemed at ease sharing such details with her. She wasn't sure what she expected when she had first asked the question but this had definitely not been it.

After a moment Maura pulled out the last thing in the box. The minute she figured out what it was she was shocked. She held it in her hand and just stared at Jane. She couldn't hide her surprise. "Jane?"

Jane didn't avert her eyes. It surprised her a little. She usually avoided direct eye contact with Maura during situations like this but for some reason she held Maura's gaze and refused to let it go.

"I don't think I was convinced we were going to be friends until that weekend," Jane started her explanation to what Maura had in her hand. "I mean, we had coffee a few times and lunch but when we talked it seemed to always be about a case or work. If you remember, it took us a little while to get a good feel for each other."

Maura smirked a bit as she flashed back to her first few interactions with Jane. Things were a bit reserved and formal in the beginning.

Jane continued, "The whole station was taken with you. You had to be the smartest person any of us had ever encountered. Several of our first conversations just intimidated the hell out of me," she admitted. "I mean I kept putting my foot in my mouth like usual and I was sure you just thought that I was an arrogant and insensitive ass."

"I didn't," Maura answered immediately. "If anything I couldn't figure out why you kept trying to talk to me outside of a crime scene." Jane kept wandering down to the morgue in between cases to strike up a conversation with Maura. No one had ever tried to just be friends with her before. "I was sure I was going to run you off."

"Well, clearly you didn't," Jane answered back with a smile. She looked at what was still in Maura's hand. "I was so sure you were going to say no to me when I asked you. I almost chickened out. You have no idea how close I came to not asking you."

Maura looked down at the ticket stub in her hand. "I never would have said no to you," she declared.

"Well, yeah. I know that now. But back then we'd only had like two lunches together and coffee a few times. I had no idea what you would even think of the invitation."

Maura remembered exactly what she thought about the invitation. She had been touched. No one had ever just asked her to do something just because. Invitations to events or places always seemed to have an agenda attached to them. One usually involving her mother. She was blown away when Jane had come down to the morgue for no other reason than to ask her if she wanted to see a movie that weekend. If she remembered correctly it took a little too long for her to get out the answer of 'yes'.

"I was surprised," she admitted.

Jane smiled. She understood Maura's reaction to the invite to a simple movie now more than she did back then. "I could tell. You took forever to say yes. I think I almost retracted the offer."

"I'm glad you didn't," she said.

"So am I. It was after that weekend that I knew we were going to be friends," Jane finished as if that was the explanation for why she had kept the movie ticket stub all these years. What she didn't tell Maura in that moment was that it was also the weekend she found herself falling for her. That Maura just didn't need to know.

Not knowing what else to do, Maura placed the ticket stub back in the box and handed everything over to Jane. She couldn't believe she had a place in Jane's personal box. She hadn't expected that. She hadn't expected any part of that conversation. Jane returned the box to her bedroom and came back to take her place again on the couch. Maura snuggled up into Jane again and Jane resumed the movie.

But as the movie played, neither lady paid much attention to what was happening on the TV. Both seemed lost in their own thoughts.

"Jane?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for showing me those things," Maura spoke softly.

Jane didn't answer. She couldn't. But she did pull Maura in a little closer and was happy when she didn't feel Maura resist.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

**May 20th**

**Mass General**

Jane walked slowly towards the entrance of the hospital after parking her car. This really was the last place she wanted to be and it wasn't simply because she hated hospitals. Although she really did hate hospitals. She was nervous and as she headed towards the front entrance her nervousness only seemed to increase.

_Maybe this isn't such a good idea._

There were two people inside that hospital she wasn't sure she was ready to see. One because of the physical shape and pain he was in and the other because of the emotional shape and pain she was in. As far as Jane was concerned she was responsible for both people's state of being.

She didn't relish the idea of seeing Rondo laying helplessly in a hospital bed. He shouldn't have been involved in any of this in the first place and the guilt Jane felt for letting him get injured was almost crippling. She couldn't shake the images of the blood coming from her friend's chest. Those images haunted her. What little sleep she had managed over the last forty eight hours had been interrupted with nightmares surrounding Rondo's shooting.

He didn't deserve what was happening to him. Didn't deserve to be laying in that room fighting for his life. She should have caught the suspect before any of this had happened. But it was more than that. She knew it was more a matter of her not being there instead of not catching the bad guy. She should have been with Maura when all of this happened. Had she been there, she was sure Rondo wouldn't have been shot. She should have been at Maura's side. Watching over her. Protecting her. Instead she had been avoiding her. Ignoring her. And now a dear friend was paying the price for her own weaknesses.

She had no idea how she was ever going to make this up to Rondo. How she was ever going to repay him for saving the life of the woman she loved. All she knew as she entered the elevator that would take her to the floor her friend was on was that he needed to be ok. To get better. To give her at least a chance at trying to make amends for her many wrongs.

She stepped off the hospital elevator and looked down the hallway that lead to Rondo's room. An odd sensation overtook her. The hallway was both infinitely long and perplexingly short. She wondered for a moment how something could seem so far and yet too close all at the same time. The feelings disturbed her and left her feeling completely off balance. But she knew she couldn't avoid the room forever. She needed to see Rondo.

Had it been just Rondo in that room Jane knew she wouldn't be feeling the trepidation she was now feeling. If Rondo was her only concern she knew the guilt over his injury wouldn't prevent her from walking through that door and staying with her friend until he was out of the woods. But it wasn't just Rondo in that room. Jane knew Maura was there and that changed everything.

Maura.

Thoughts of the previous two days come flooding back to Jane. A mental list of the mistakes she had made rushed at her one after the other. Too many mistakes in such a short period of time. The consequences to each of them had been playing out before Jane like some tragedy she no longer could impact. No longer change.

As determined as she was to move forward down that hallway she found her feet seemed to have a mind all of their own. They appeared to be cemented to the floor. So, she just stood there. Not moving forward but not retreating either. Desperately trying to get her mind and her body, or at least her feet, to get on the same page and move. Hopefully forward. But in that moment Jane would have settled for backwards too.

She was nervous at the prospect of seeing Maura again. The thought of seeing her after all that had happened suddenly made her stomach roll. She took in a deep breath trying to ride out the wave of nausea. She just wasn't sure if she was ready to face Maura yet and she was convinced that Maura didn't want to see her.

She knew Maura would be there. In that room. She knew she hadn't left Rondo's side since he had been admitted into the hospital. Jane even understood why. Unlike herself, who knew it was her fault Rondo was hurt, Jane knew Maura would feel guilty that he had been shot and not her. Jane was fairly certain Maura believed it should be her laying in that bed. Jane knew Maura wasn't leaving the hospital until she was convinced Rondo was going to be alright.

To see him was to also see her. She hadn't spoken to Maura since it all happened. She'd been avoiding that very thing. It was clear Maura didn't want to talk to her and she hadn't wanted to upset Maura further. She had done enough damage things as it was. But she had also been avoiding Maura for her own sake as well. Rehashing the events of the last two days was the last thing she wanted to do. Avoidance wasn't meant to be a permanent solution but it seemed to be what was needed up until that moment.

Despite the strong urge she had to leave she knew she would move forward. She was drawn to Rondo's room. She needed to see him. To see for herself that he was stable and he would indeed be alright. She needed to thank him for doing what she should have done. She needed to tell him that he had to pull through and get better so she could thank him properly for saving the life of the woman she loved. And that was the part she knew would win out. Her need to see Rondo won out in the mental battle over her need to avoid Maura.

Finally her feet seemed to want to cooperate and get on the same page as at least her head. She started walking down that short, yet still oddly long, hallway towards Rondo's room. As she approached she saw a uniformed officer standing guard at Rondo's door. That was definitely a sign that Maura was inside the room.

As Jane walked closer she saw the officer was Frankie. Jane had convinced Cavanaugh to put a protective detail on Maura until their suspect had been caught. She trusted her brother to make sure no one hurt Maura. After Rondo was shot Jane realized that Maura would continue to be in danger until the suspect was caught. Maura's safety was something Jane usually saw to personally. But after all that had happened she knew she wasn't in a position to handle that. So others were needed to do what was normally her responsibility. She wanted people she trusted watching over Maura. She had requested Frankie and two other officers she trusted to handle the 8 hour rotations. If it wasn't going to Jane watching over Maura then Maura would have the best the BPD had to offer.

"Jane," Frankie said, "what are you doing here?" He was surprised to see his sister. He knew she hadn't spoken to Maura in almost two days and seemed to be deliberately avoiding her. He just didn't understand why. He was relieved. Maybe Jane being here meant she was going to try to make up with Maura.

"The raid of the motel didn't go well. The guy got away before we could get him," she said with extreme frustration in her voice. "Vince refused to let me back into the station."

Frankie nodded. He figured one of the guys had intervened to try to get Jane to get some sleep. "I'm sorry. You'll find this guy," he said trying to reassure her. He didn't know all the details of the case but he knew Jane had been looking for this guy for two weeks and that the guy was responsible for both the incidents with Maura. Knowing Jane as well as he did, he was sure she was blaming herself for everything.

"We need to," she acknowledged. She was quiet for a minute staring at the hospital door. "Have you seen him?"

Frankie nodded. "He's still unconscious. Maura says all his vitals have stabilized. She says it's more of a question of when he will wake up not if he will." The last time Frankie had gotten an update from Maura she was convinced that Rondo would make a full recovery.

Jane nodded. Rondo was tough. His years on the street made him a fighter. "That needs to be soon," she said and went back to staring at the door.

Frankie sensed Jane's hesitation. He knew she hated hospitals but he was pretty sure she wasn't hesitating because of Rondo. She was hesitating because of Maura. "She hasn't left once Jane," Frankie said. "Ma's out getting food for her right now." Maybe if he forced some of this conversation Jane would talk to him. He highly doubted it but he needed to try.

That tugged at Jane's heart. She knew this all was hurting Maura as much as it was hurting her. Rondo got shot protecting Maura so Jane knew Maura was feeling responsible and guilty. It wasn't Maura's fault. It was Jane's. If they were speaking Jane would have tried to convince Maura of that.

When Jane didn't say anything Frankie pushed a little harder. "Jane, what is going on between the two of you?" No one understood it. Not Barry. Not Vince. Not even his mother. Jane didn't tell anyone much of anything but there were times she confided in Angela. But the last time Frankie spoke to his mother she was just as clueless about Jane and Maura as everyone else seemed to be.

"That's between the two of us," was all Jane was willing to say. She loved her brother but she wasn't about to discuss the details of how she screwed up the best thing she had in her life. One, it wasn't his business. And two, it hurt too much to try to even recount the tale.

Frankie figured Jane wouldn't explain things. He hadn't exactly expected her to suddenly open up and pour her heart out. But he wasn't done with her yet either. She was his sister and he cared about her and her happiness. So, he was going to speak his mind.

"Jane, I don't know what happened between you two," he started.

"That's right, you don't," she said rather defensively. She really didn't want to discuss any of this.

"But that being said, I'm just going to say this. You love her. You have for years. Don't let whatever this problem is between you get in the way of what you two have. Or could have if you both just stopped being stubborn and admit to each other how you feel."

Jane was stunned by what Frankie had said. She knew Angela knew she loved Maura but she really didn't think anyone else knew it was more than friendship. "How?" Jane asked in an almost stutter.

"Because your my sister Jane. I've known you my entire life. I've known for a long time that you are in love with her. I've never understood why you two haven't just told each other that. It would save you both a lot of unnecessary headache if you just admitted it."

Before she realized what she was saying she heard herself speak. "She doesn't feel the same." She hadn't meant to say that outloud. She hadn't meant to confirm to Frankie how she felt or that it was one-sided.

The tone from Jane startled Frankie. He'd never heard her sound like that before. As he looked at her he could see the pain in her eyes. Clearly whatever had happened between the two involved this very subject. Frankie couldn't believe that Jane was right about Maura's feelings. "That's not possible Jane. Maura loves you too." He had no idea how Jane could not see how Maura felt about her. Frankie thought everyone could see it.

"No, she doesn't," Jane answered back in an insistent tone. "Don't Frankie," was her next comment. But it wasn't a comment as much as it was a plea to drop the subject. "Look, I just want to see how Rondo is doing and then I'm going home. I'm not talking about any of this right now." She wasn't up for this discussion. Her head was suddenly spinning and she hadn't even made her way into Rondo's room. She wondered again if coming here had been a mistake.

"Not talking about what right now?" Angela asked as she approached her two children. She had a snack full of food for Maura but that was now all but forgotten in her surprise to see Jane at the hospital.

"I was just telling Jane that Maura loves her too and they both just need to be honest with each other about how they feel and get passed whatever they are fighting about," Frankie said rather smugly. He knew that would get Angela going. It was a little unfair to attack Jane like this but he was sick of watching Jane and Maura screw up a potentially good thing. It was time for an intervention with the heavy guns and Angela was the heaviest gun he knew.

Jane looked over at Frankie like she was going to kill him. She was perfectly aware of what he had just unleashed.

"See Jane, even Frankie knows that you love Maura. It's not some big secret like you pretend that it is. And I agree with him. From what I can see, Maura loves you too. What the hell happened between you two that is causing both of you to act like the other one hates you?"

Angela knew Maura believed that Jane was mad at her and didn't want to see her. Looking at Jane it was clear that Jane believed it was Maura who didn't want to see her. Angela sensed that miscommunication was at the heart of what their problem was. As far as Angela was concerned it was time to straighten all of this out.

"I'm not talking about this with either one of you," Jane said sternly now cursing at herself for even stopping at the hospital. She wasn't up for this. She was tired. She wasn't thinking clearly and had said too much already. She wanted to leave. She could come back to see Rondo later. She hadn't even gotten into the room and all of this was more than she felt she was ready to deal with. She was about to turn away when she heard her mother.

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli don't you dare even think about walking away from this conversation," Angela got out in the uniquely Angela voice that just got under the skin of her children. She watched as Jane cringed but noticed that she stopped moving and stood still. "Good. Now, you are going to stand there and listen to me young lady. This stops right now."

Angela handed the sack full of food for Maura to Frankie. He took it and stepped out of the way. He'd seen that look on his mother's face before and he was just happy it wasn't directed at him.

"You are going to go into that room and you are going to get her. Then you both are going to go somewhere private and talk. Something happened between you two a few days ago and for some reason you both had the same horrible reaction to it. You both are convinced that the other one now hates you.

"But it's not true, is it? Because I certainly know that you don't hate Maura. And unlike you, I've talked to Maura today, and trust me she doesn't hate you either. So instead of acting like the adults you are supposed to be, the two of you are continuing to play games with each other and each other's feelings and I'm telling you right now Jane you both are running the risk of losing the other one forever. Is that what you want? Do you want to push her away?

"Because if it's not what you want then you need to put a stop to this. Damn it Jane, for once in your life will you please just decide you are worth it and tell her that you are in love with her? She loves you. I've tried to tell you that for a year. You've fought me every step of the way and you are fighting me now. But you have to believe me when I say that she loves you too."

Jane was about to protest. To tell her mother that Maura didn't love her. Couldn't love her. Angela just didn't understand everything that had happened between the two women. She was about to start to explain that very point but before she could get as much as one word out Angela cut her off. She wasn't done trying to talk sense into her stubborn daughter.

"Not a word yet, young lady. You are going to listen to everything I have to say to you." Angela stared right at her daughter. Jane knew the stare. It wasn't a stare at her it was a stare through her. It was enough to silence her. Angela then continued. "You've always told me that you couldn't tell her how you felt because you were afraid to lose her. Well, how's not telling her working out for you so far? Because from where I stand you are about to lose her for good. So as I see it, what do you really have to lose now?

"Tell her. Go in there and tell her how much she means to you before it's too late and you have nothing but a deep regret for the rest of your life. She loves you Jane. And, despite what you think, you deserve to be happy. You both do. Jane, you deserve her in your life."

Jane had stood there after her mother had stop talking without saying a word. She knew for Angela to understand, to really understand it all, she would have to tell her what had happened. If Angela was ever going to accept the fact that she were wrong about Maura's feelings towards Jane, Jane knew she had to tell Angela the truth.

"Ma," Jane finally started. She looked at Angela and paused. She was unsure if she was ready to recount the saga that had been the last forty eight hours of her life. Taking a deep breath she started to speak.

But all three Rizzolis were interrupted by a voice they all knew.

"They are both right Jane," Maura said walking out of Rondo's room and approaching Jane who turned and just stared at Maura. "I do love you."


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

**May 17th**

"That's it! Now this guy is just pissing me off," Jane said to Frost as they took in the latest crime scene. They had spent the last twenty minutes debating whether or not their current victim, Alex Jarvis, was linked to their John Doe suspect from the Franklin and Scott murders. The group consensus was yes. There were some differences, including the fact that the victim was a male, but Jane was pretty sure this was the other male from the video from Jake's. The GSW also appeared to be a 9 millimeter and all three detectives detected the now familiar bleach signature. "I think he just cleaned house," she added.

Frost nodded. "If this is our guy, it does appear that he has eliminated anyone we know he has been seen with."

Jane looked over the latest crime scene and couldn't help the anxious feeling running through her. It had been awhile since she hadn't been able to clear a case and now with a probable third victim she was going to have to come up with some answers for Cavanaugh as to why they couldn't seem to identify, let alone find, their chief suspect. It had been a second week of dead ends for Jane and Frost. The journal Jane found at the warehouse had given them several promising leads. Korsak, Frost and Jane had spent the better part of the week chasing down each lead. Each one lead them nowhere. This case was frustrating Jane. All she had to show for nearly two weeks of effort was clues but no real information. And now three dead bodies.

All the video surveillance from places Scott's journal lead them to showed her either by herself or with Kelly Franklin. But never with either of the two men from Jake's. Everyone they interviewed or showed Franklin and Scott's photos recognized the girls but no one could identify any male suspects and no one seemed to be able to put a name to the blurred and fuzzy faces from the video from Jake's. Frost even spent an entire day at Jake's reviewing random video from prior days just trying to see if the two guys were regulars. But that was a dead end too.

No one seemed to have any idea if Scott or Franklin were involved in anything more than prostitution. Word on the street was that Franklin was into drugs but not heavy. Maura's autopsy seemed to confirm that. Scott's tox screen was clear. So if she was involved with drugs it wasn't for personal use.

Even Rondo was trying to help Jane. After he learned that Scott was also found dead he stepped up his efforts to get any information for Jane about the two girls that he could. He helped identify some of their regular 'Johns' hoping that might help the investigation. He found a few 'frequent fliers' but each person checked out. Those men may have been guilty of soliciting for sex but none of them were the killer Jane was looking for.

Frost spent a lot of the previous two weeks trying to piece together the electronics profile of each victim. He chased the cell phone calls for each of the girls. There weren't many incoming or outgoing calls for either girl. Outgoing calls linked back to either an untraceable disposable cell phone, legitimate businesses or a small handful of friends. Outside of the disposable cell all the calls checked out and didn't give them anymore information than they already had.

He tried to track down the disposable cell. He only got as far as the lot number and an estimation of when the cell was sent to retail outlets. He couldn't trace the purchase or the activation and his repeated attempts to ping the number to get a GPS signal failed. The phone was either turned off or had already been discarded.

Neither Franklin nor Scott had credit cards. Franklin had a debit card but she didn't use it often and hadn't for a week before she was killed. The purchases each did make were cash and carry type transactions. They still hadn't even been able to figure out where Franklin had been staying. Rondo came across several possibilities but all turned up to be dead ends as well.

They had hit an investigative wall and Jane hated it. They didn't understand the motive. They didn't have an ID for their suspects. They didn't have anything outside cause of death and they simply wasn't enough to offer any kind of break in the case.

As Jane talked with Frost she was also starting to let her eyes scan through the crowd. She had, in the last few minutes, the feeling that they were being watched. There was a crowd of people gathered looking on, which Jane was used to, but she couldn't seem to shake the feeling that someone from the crowd was more than just a casual observer.

This wasn't the first time Jane had gotten this feeling while being at a crime scene connected to this suspect. She had asked the CSRU team to take photos of the crowd during the last crime scene but they couldn't match any of the photos to their suspect. But having the feeling they were being watched again gave Jane a new idea.

"Frost," Jane said.

"Yeah?" he replied.

"Do you get the feeling we are being watched?" she asked casually not wanting him to jerk his head up and look intently at the crowd.

Frost was quiet for a minute as he tried to just take in the entire scene. And then he felt it too. "Yeah, I think we are. Do you want to have me get a tech to take more photos?"

"No, that didn't seem to work very well last time. I think we need more than that. Vince?" Jane called out to Korsak who had walked over to speak with Maura.

Hearing Jane call him he stepped away from the ME and wandered over to Jane and Frost. "What's up?" he asked.

"I think he's here," Jane said very quietly. "I think we are being watched from the crowd."

Vince slowly shifted himself so he could casually observe the crowd. "Do you want more pictures?" he asked.

"We tried that at the last scene and it didn't get us anywhere. I'm thinking video," Jane said.

Frost smiled at this idea. "Video may be a little better than still shots," he agreed.

"I think we need to see how the people in the crowd react to to being filmed," Jane offered up. At this point she was willing to do just about anything. "Can we get video footage going and this time let's not hide that we are taping the crowd. I want to see if we make anyone nervous when we start filming them."

"I like the idea Jane," Korsak said. "I'll get a tech started." He walked off to track down a tech.

"While the tech starts the video process we need to stand back and look for reactions. Someone who quickly tries to leave the scene. Someone who deliberately tries to hide their face. I think he's here but I need to see reactions."

Frost nodded, "Jane, you know who would be really good at this?"

She didn't need him to give her the answer. Instead she turned and called out, "Maura?"

Maura, hearing her name, looked over and nodded at Jane. She finished her conversation with a tech and then walked back over to Jane and Frost. "Yes Jane?"

"We are in need of your expertise," Jane said.

"Which expertise is that?" Maura asked.

Jane couldn't help but smile at Maura's response. "There's a chance that our suspect is amongst the crowd that is gathered behind us. I'm pretty sure he was watching at the warehouse crime scene too. We tried getting photos the last time but that didn't help us. So now, we are going to actively video tape the crowd without trying to hide our intentions."

Maura nodded and understood what Jane was saying. "You want my help with body and facial reactions," she completely Jane's request.

"That's exactly what I need. Korsak is getting one of the techs to come out and start filming. Can you help Frost and I monitor people's reactions?"

"Certainly," Maura answered with a smile. She was glad to be of any help to Jane. She understood that this particular case was frustrating Jane.

Frost, Jane and Maura all started to walk closer to the crowd. They walked around a bit trying to find the best place to observe the crowd reactions to the sudden videotaping. When they found their place they stood waiting for Korsak and the tech to reappear and start filming.

"Oh Jane," Maura started, "there is a chance that I may be able to isolate the bleach chemicals the suspect appears to be using to wash down the bodies. The first victim we could only find trace amounts but with Scott we had a better sample of the chemical. This victim also shows signs of coming into contact with the bleach like substance. I'm having the lab try to break down the chemical samples to see if we can isolate any compound. I do not believe the suspect is using common household bleach. If we can isolate the chemical composition that may lead us to a product source."

Jane smiled at that notion. They hadn't had a lot of forensic evidence up to that point so anything Maura could find would be of great help. "Anything you can give us Maura we'll take. I need help with this case," she admitted.

Maura nodded. "I should have something for you in the next day or two."

R&I

Korsak walked over to the group with one of the CSRU techs who was holding a video camera. "Alright, I need you to start filming the crime scene but I want you to pan across the crowd in front of us first. Start at one end and film the entire crowd as slowly as possible. Don't react to anyone and keep panning slowly across until you have captured everyone on video. We will stay behind you and watch for reactions. Once you get to the end of the crowd pan back in the opposite direction so we get the entire crowd twice. Then spend some time videoing the actual crime scene."

The tech nodded at Korsak and stepped in front of the three detectives and ME to start the filming. The four all focused their attention on the crowd trying to watch their reactions intently. Jane saw minor reactions once people realized that the tech was filming them but didn't notice any major reaction to the filming. The tech did a good job of pacing the panning action of the camera from left to right and then back the opposite way. The entire process took several minutes to complete.

Once the tech finished with the crowd he left to shoot the rest of the area. Jane turned her attention to the others. "Anything strike you?" she asked. Both Frost and Korsak shook their heads.

"I'll need to see the playback but I was almost certain I saw two men avert their faces when they thought the camera was filming them. There was nothing overt but it still registered with me," she answered.

"Which men?" Jane asked.

"The man in the black shirt and white shorts," Maura started to point out, "and..." she paused looking around. "And the other man is gone," she said. "He was wearing a blue shirt, sunglasses and khaki shorts. But I don't see him anymore."

All four looked around for anyone walking away. Nothing was seen. Jane nodded to Frost who walked out into the crowd to speak with the first man Maura pointed out. "We'll take a look at the video on playback and see if we can pick out the second man," Jane said. "Thanks Maura."

R&I

The man in the blue shirt, sunglasses and khaki shorts was rather proud of himself for slipping away from the crime scene without being detected. He was taken by surprise when the man came out and started filming the crowd. He was unsure how the detective seemed to know that he might have been in the crowd.

He was happy to avoid detection. He had to be subtle about his movements. He figured out quickly when the filming started that the group of four were trying to watch for quick, sudden facial or body language tells. He had to force himself to stay relaxed and calm as the filming occurred. He was sure he avoided being directly filmed and also that no one picked up on his attempts to shield his face from the camera. Plus he was sure the sunglasses would help conceal his identity.

As he made his way to his car he let what other piece of information that he discovered that surprised him play though his mind. He had thought that with the elimination of Alex Jarvis he was finished eliminating anyone who could identify him as a killer. He had been fairly certain that his identity was secure. Until, that was, he overheard what the medical examiner had said.

He couldn't believe that she could possibly have stumbled upon an unexpected clue to his identity. He knew that washing the bodies in the bleach formula would wipe away all traces of forensic evidence. And he thought he had gotten better with his technique. With Franklin he had used it to wash her down but he forgot about underneath her fingernails. He hadn't even seen the scratches from her until after he had dumped the body.

So in handling both Scott and Jarvis he thought he had fixed that first mistake. He never thought about the bleach solution being a potential clue the police could use to find him. He would have to do something about that. As he started his car and drove away he thought about what he needed to do.

The ME hadn't finished processing the labs yet. If he could keep her from doing that then maybe they wouldn't follow-up on that possible lead. As he drove he decided. He would have to deal with medical examiner. Apparently he had at least one more person to deal with before he could feel as if he had been able to get away with murder.

R&I

**May 18th**

He opened his laptop and let the machine launch its operating system. Once it was up and running he quickly connected to the wireless signal that was made available in the cafe that he was sitting in. He established his connection to the Internet and opened a Google web search. Typing in his search criteria he waited while the search was quickly performed.

Looking at the search results he first went through the available video footage from the local news stations. He watched footage from all four local networks. All basically said the same thing. Police were investigating a series of deaths but they had yet to be able to identify a suspect or isolate a motive. A tipline had been established and police were seeking any information about the three victims.

He then went through the newspaper coverage of the three murders. The message was basically the same although the printed articles offered up better details. The police believed that the three bodies were connected in some manner but did not know what the motive behind the killings was. They also did not have a suspect. One paper cited an 'unnamed source' inside the department as saying that the detectives did not have any tangible clue as to the identity of the suspect and everyone involved in the case was worried that the case was going cold.

Nothing in any of the information led him to believe that the police were close to discovering his identity. It was clear that they didn't understand the connection between the two girls and Alex. Had they figured that out they would surely know his identity. He couldn't help the small smile that swept across his face knowing he was very close to literally getting away with murder.

The small smile was not a full grin. Only because he had overheard that medical examiner tell that detective that she might have a lead from the bleach solution he had used to wash the victims. If she could isolate the chemical properties and discover that he was using an industrial bleaching agent he was now concerned that she might be able to generate a list of places that used that agent. And he knew that list was small. Very, very small.

He couldn't have that medical examiner connecting those dots. He didn't want that kind of attention on his place of employment. He couldn't risk them looking at him or into his background. Sitting in the cafe looking at the information available on the Internet, he knew the only thing standing between his getting away with murder and detection was that medical examiner.

He was just going to have to get rid of the medical examiner. That should solve this particular issue. He closed out his Internet session and shut down his computer. He knew he needed to handle her as quickly as possible to keep her from finishing her chemical analysis.

R&I

_The guys are going for a drink after work. Join us? J_

_What time? M_

_Probably around 6. J_

_I need to run to the mall after work but I can join you later. M_

_We should be there for a couple of drinks. J_

_Want to coming shopping with me? M_

_Jane? M_

_Seriously Jane, it's only a little shopping. M_

_See you at the bar later. J_

_So, is that a no to shopping? M_

_Do you really need an answer to that? J_

_Apparently not. M_

R&I

Maura was just finishing up her shopping when she looked at the time. 6:25 pm. She was sure she could still catch Jane and the guys at the Robber. A smile crossed her face as she realized just how much she looked forward to after work drinks with the guys. Jane was clearly her best friend but she had come to see and value the friendships with Barry and Vince as much as she had with Jane.

She hadn't had too many people in her life she would call a friend. She had a lot of acquaintances but friends were a rare commodity for her. She hadn't planned on acquiring friends like Barry and Vince at such a late stage in her life but she now couldn't imagine her life without them.

Nor could she imagine her life without any of the Rizzolis. Jane was the best friend she ever had but it was more than that. Jane was also family. The Rizzoli clan had become Maura's family. Angela, Frankie and even Tommy were all so dear to her. She was closer to them than she own family. She knew without hesitation that they viewed her as an honorary Rizzoli. She belonged. She fit somewhere. She fit into the world of the Rizzolis and she was thankful for that each and every day.

After running down her mental shopping list to ensure that she hadn't forgotten to stop somewhere, Maura started to head to the parking garage to retrieve her car. She hadn't noticed she had acquired a shadow after her first store. She hadn't really been paying much attention to her surroundings. But she was being followed.

She had just placed her shopping bags into the backseat of her car when she found herself suddenly being grabbed from behind. It was in an instant. A hand just seemed to be pushed up against her nose and mouth while at the same time a strong arm had reached around her waist and had started to try to pull her to her left.

It took just a second for her to realize this was real. This was happening. Someone was trying to grab her. Take her. Hurt her. Her mind registered the threat and she felt her body stiffened in the grasp. She tried to scream but the hand still pushing into her face seemed to keep her screams muffled and not loud enough to be very effective.

She tried to pull free of the grip from around her waist but found her uncoordinated struggles didn't seem to break her free from whoever was trying to hurt her. She felt panic starting to sink in and immediately her mind raced to thoughts of Jane.

Jane.

Jane had taught her how to get free from holds like this. Jane had spent hours personally trying to teach Maura self defense techniques. Maura tried to clear her mind and tried to remember what exactly it was that Jane had taught her. She knew she needed to recall something quickly otherwise she was in serious trouble.

R&I

_"Maura, come on you have to concentrate. I could be an evil stalker trying to kidnap you," Jane sighed with frustration. She had been trying to work with Maura on these defense techniques for twenty minutes but Maura kept giggling in the middle of each exercise._

_Maura cleared her throat and tried to hide the smile on her face. She hadn't meant to get an attack of the giggles but she couldn't help it every time Jane tried to grab her from behind it was just making her laugh. She knew Jane was getting mad and she needed to focus._

_"I'm sorry. I'm trying to stop," she said._

_"Maur, you need to learn this stuff. I'm not always going to be there to watch over you and I need," she paused looking at her friend, "I just really need to believe that you can handle yourself if something ever happened."_

_Something about the look that flashed across Jane's face put a sudden stop to the giggles that had been lingering within Maura. She looked at Jane for a minute trying to decipher the look but Jane had suddenly looked away._

_"You're right. I need to learn this. I'm sorry. I'm good now," Maura said and she made herself ready for Jane's attempted assault again. Determined this time not to laugh._

_Jane took her place again behind Maura and repeated her instructions. 'Now remember, if anyone ever tries to grab you from behind the worst thing you can do is struggle and thrash around. That won't free you. When I grab ahold of you, I want you to relax before you do anything else. Then I want you to attempt to stomp on my foot. I don't care which one but I want you to stomp as hard as you can on my foot. That should loosen the hold I have on you even if only for a second._

_"When you feel my arms loosen, you need to turn into me. This is very important. Into me. Not away from me. Your body will want to pull away but you have to move in closer to help create a gap in between your body and mine. As you turn into me I need you lift either one of your legs and you will knee me in the groin. Trust me when I say if I'm a male attacker that's going to almost enough for you get free and run away._

_"After you've managed to put my ability to father future children in question the pain should be enough that you can then push out of my grip. If I'm still standing after you've broken free I want you to kick at the back of one of my knees. It will give out and force me to fall over. That gives you the opening you need to run. Run as fast as you can and don't look back. _

_"Ok, do you have all of that?" she asked._

_Maura nodded. "I've got it. Stomp on foot, turn into you, knee you in the groin, break free, kick the back of a knee." She paused and looked at Jane. "Are you sure I won't actually hurt you?" Jane was wearing protective gear on every place Maura was supposed to target but she was still unsure if she wanted to actually kick Jane._

_"I'll be fine. You forget I've done this in the Academy hundreds of times. You need a real person to actually hit in order for you to feel how the body reacts. Now come on. One full run through. Ok?"_

_Maura conceded, "Alright. I'm as ready as I will ever be."_

_Jane approached Maura from behind and engulfed her into a bear hug. Maura took one deep breath and then concentrated on the steps Jane told her to do. She picked up her right foot and brought it slamming down onto the top of Jane's right foot. As soon as she made contact she felt Jane's arms weaken a bit against her. Not enough to totally break out but Jane had been right that the grip loosened._

_She then turned her body to the left and into Jane almost deliberately pulling the woman in closer. As soon as she was almost sideways she raised her right leg and pulled it back. As she finished turning into Jane she forced her knee into Jane's groin as hard as she could. That's when she felt Jane was right about the grip. She could now push off of Jane and break free of the bear hug. When she did that she remembered the last thing Jane said and she pulled her left leg back and let her left foot collide with the back of Jane's right knee._

_Jane's leg gave out instantly and she toppled over onto the ground. Maura took a few steps back and couldn't help the proud smile she felt come across her face. She had managed to follow all of Jane's instructions and get free. She felt exhilarated until she realized that Jane hadn't made an effort to get up._

_Fear suddenly sank in for Maura. "Jane? Oh, Jane are you ok?" she asked stepping closer to her downed friend._

_"I'm good,' Jane struggled to get out. "Just need a minute here." She was trying to catch her breath. She felt Maura's knee to the groin more than she thought she would. It basically knocked the wind out of her._

_Maura slowly sat down next to her friend. "I'm sorry," she offered._

_"I'm not," Jane said with a hint of pride. "That's exactly what I need you to do if this ever actually happens to you."_

R&I

In a fraction of a second Maura recalled it all and decided to act. She slammed her foot down on top of her attacker's foot. She felt both his arms loosen before her ears registered his first scream. She then turned into him and had her leg raised in another fraction of a second. With everything she could muster she rammed her knee into the attacker's groin.

The holler of pain he emitted was not a sound Maura had ever heard from a man before. He instantly released his grip on her to the point where she didn't even have to push off of him to get free. In one last fluid motion she took her leg back and used her right foot to kick the back of the man's knee. It gave out easily and the man fell to the ground in severe pain.

Maura stood and stared at the form on the ground. She was free but she found herself standing still. She looked at the man on the ground before her mind caught up to everything and she remembered the last thing Jane had told her. _Run. Run as fast as you can and don't look back._

Her legs seemed to understand her head quicker than she was ready for. Because suddenly she was running and yelling for help. Her mind was racing too fast with too much to even register the sound of the single gunshot her attacker attempted. He missed her completely. The bullet embedded into a car.

Maura ran back to the mall and her screaming gathered enough attention that store personnel in several shops called mall security. By the time mall security was able to check out the parking garage the would be attacker had disappeared.

R&I

Jane looked down at her phone to check the time. 7:05 pm. Her brow furrowed. She was hoping Maura was going to join them.

"I thought you said Maura was joining us," Korsak commented.

"She was going to after she did some shopping. She must have gotten seduced by a sale," she said with a smirk. Her phone rang and she saw it was Maura.

"Maura, where are you? I thought you were..." she went suddenly quiet. Korsak and Frost noticed the change in her demeanor immediately. "Stay right there! We are coming! Don't move!"

She hung up and pulled out cash from her pocket throwing it on their table. "We have to go! Maura's been attacked at the mall!"

She was out the door before either man could react. But two seconds after they let what she said sink in they were out that front door too. All three were now hauling ass to get to their friend.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

**May 18th**

There wasn't a traffic law that Jane didn't violate as she sped towards Maura. If she were to allow for rational thought she would have hurriedly, but calmly, driven to the mall. But the minute she heard the fear in Maura's voice all rational thought completely escaped her. Now she was acting on pure instinct. Fueled by very raw emotion she wanted nothing more than to ensure that the woman she loved was safe and protected.

She made it to the mall in no time flat. She buried her partners in her dust and they, too, had thrown all known traffic laws out the window. All three slicing and weaving through Boston traffic leaving the lights and sirens as the only explanation for what just buzzed by unsuspecting commuters.

Maura had mentioned the parking garage at the mall on the phone and that's exactly where Jane's lightning quick vehicle finally made its complete stop. If asked later she would have to admit not even remembering putting the car in park and she would be unable to recall if she ever powered off the car before exiting to find Maura. The area had been sealed off as a crime scene by the time she had pulled up and the reality of seeing fellow officers and emergency personnel just seemed to increase the panic level of the normally reserved detective.

Her lights and sirens were one thing. Pulling up and seeing how many other officers had responded made Maura's attack suddenly real. Somehow more serious and absolutely more threatening. As she sprinted towards the scene she didn't even notice the handful of uniformed officers looking at her in wonder. Instead, her eyes went immediately to the plain clothed detective in the pack. She was thankful for who had responded to the call.

"Doug, where is she?" Jane virtually hollered at the senior detective while she was still running.

"Down that hallway, first door on the left," the older man shouted back. He had expected Jane as much as he had expected her reaction to what had occurred here. "Jane, she's ok," he added shouting at the back of Jane's head knowing she wouldn't stop until she found her friend and honestly expecting nothing less from her than what he had seen.

The speed that Jane closed the distance between herself and that first door on the left was impressive. She was there in no time at all. Bringing herself to a complete stop just on the edge of the doorway she let her eyes scan the room. She'd figure out who else was there later. Right in that moment she wanted to find one person.

And then her eyes locked onto the set of hazel eyes she adored. But the fear she saw reflecting back at her from those usually gentle and loving eyes nearly broke her heart. She couldn't have the woman she loved suffering through a look like that. She had to make it better.

She was across the room and in front of Maura in what amounted to nanoseconds. No words were exchanged between the two women. Instead, Jane had simply pulled Maura up from the chair she had been sitting in and engulfed her in a protective embrace. She felt Maura relax instantly into her arms. That moment. That physical manifestation of trust and love almost made Jane go weak in the knees.

"You're ok," Jane whispered quietly into Maura's ear. "I've got you. You're safe." She tightened her grip on the woman when she felt Maura's body respond with an involuntary tremble. She was willing to hold onto Maura for as long as it took for the woman to feel completely at ease.

It was Maura, in fact, who finally pulled back from Jane's arms when she was ready to talk. As she pulled herself from Jane's embrace she looked at Jane and spoke. "I remembered," she said in a small voice that took Jane a little by surprise. Maura's voice usually was filled with confidence.

"Remembered?" Jane asked trying to understand what Maura was saying.

"The self defense lessons. I remembered," she repeated herself.

This time Jane understood exactly what Maura was talking about. A swell of pride that Maura was able to recall defense lessons from over a year ago to such a skilled degree that she subverted her would be attacker rushed through Jane. She didn't even need to hear the details of the attack to know that Maura had managed to stay remarkably calm in such a terrible situation. She knew the inner strength Maura possessed had more to do with her standing in front of Jane than anything Jane could have taught her all those months ago.

"I bet you were amazing," Jane said softly as she re-embraced Maura. She gently let herself kiss Maura's forehead in an effort to comfort her. Or quite possibly it was an attempt to comfort herself. But she wasn't going to fight with herself about that in this particular moment. Maura was safe and in her arms and for that moment that was all the mattered.

Jane was the one who broke the embrace the second time and she directed Maura to sit down so she could sit next to her. She turned her entire body in towards Maura and she let her entire focus center on the beautiful blonde in front of her.

"Can you tell me what happened?" Jane asked gently not wanting to force details from Maura if she wasn't completely ready to talk.

Maura silently nodded and then proceeded to explain to Jane what she could recall about what happened.

"I was heading to my car after leaving the last store. I remember thinking I was running a little late but I should still have plenty of time to join you and the guys at the bar. I was almost to my car when suddenly someone was grabbing me from behind. He had a hand over my mouth which interfered with my ability to scream and his other arm was trying to secure me around the waist.

"I tried to struggle against him for a few seconds but he was too strong for me. And that's when I remembered those self defense lessons you went through with me. I did exactly what you taught me to do Jane. I stomped on his foot. I turned into him. I kneed him in the groin and made him fall over by kicking the back of his knee. And it worked. I was able to get away."

Jane had taken both Maura's hands in her own as Maura recapped her tale. She let Maura have a moment before she started to ask a series of questions.

"Had you seen the guy before? Maybe while walking around in a store?" Jane asked.

"Not that I recall. But honestly I wasn't really paying attention to other people," Maura answered shaking her head.

"Did you get a good look at him?"

"After I kneed him in the groin and before I kicked his knee I was able to get a very good look at his face," Maura answered. "Also, before I ran off I was able to look at him too."

"Did you recognize him from anywhere at all?"

"No. I didn't recognize him."

"Did he say anything to you? Make any demands?" Jane asked still running down a routine list of questions. She assumed Doug had already asked them of Maura but she wanted to know.

"No. The only time I heard his voice was when he screamed after I hurt him," Maura answered and couldn't help a shudder that ran through her.

"Do you think you can identify this man from a photo lineup if we asked you to?" Jane wondered if Maura sat down with some mugshots if she could pick out her assailant.

"I'm fairly certain that I would be able to pick him out of a lineup," Maura answered.

Jane let Maura have a minute and then asked more more question. "And you are absolutely sure that you are ok? I can have you to the hospital in no time. You just say the word." Jane had been looking over Maura from head to toe trying to see any signs of injury but not finding any.

"I'm physically fine. I promise," Maura answered. "To be honest, I'm shaken up and I'm a little scared but he didn't physically hurt me."

Jane squeezed both of Maura's hands in hers trying to ensure the ME knew she wasn't alone and Jane was right by her side.

"Jane?"

Both Jane and Maura turned to look in the direction the voice came. They both saw Frost and Korsak standing in the doorway hesitant to enter into the room and crowd the two.

Jane understood the look on Korsak's face. He wanted to speak with her. She turned back to Maura. "I need to speak with them for a minute. Will you be ok here for a few minutes?" She wasn't leaving Maura's side unless Maura was alright.

"Go," she said. "I'm really ok."

Jane slowly stood up and for the second time that night she leaned in and kissed Maura's forehead although she wasn't nearly as cognitive of this one as she was the first one. "I'll be right back. I'm not leaving the room, ok? If you need me to come back just say my name and I'll come running."

Maura nodded. Jane let go of her hands and walked over to speak with Frost and Korsak.

"How is she?" Vince asked looking at Maura over Jane's shoulder.

"Physically she says she's fine," Jane said. "But she'd scared. Although who can blame her."

"What did she say happened?" Frost asked.

Jane spent a few minutes recalling Maura's tale and question answers to the guys. "Sounds like an attempted mugging, right?" she asked. She wasn't really sure what was going on or what had motivated the attack.

"Sounds like it. Maybe this guy spotted her in the mall and followed her to her car. I mean, Maura isn't over the top about her wealth but she doesn't exactly scream middle class either," Frost offered up.

"Jane," Korsak started but hesitated.

"What?" she asked when she noticed the hesitation.

"Did Maura say when the gun was fired?" he asked.

"What?!" she asked and couldn't keep herself from turning her head over to stare at Maura. She had never mentioned a gun.

"Jane?" Maura said seeing Jane's reaction to whatever Korsak had said.

In an instant Jane was by Maura's side again. Sensing there was no way Jane was leaving Maura's side a second time both Frost and Korsak entered into the room and approached Maura.

"Hey Doc, you scared us," Korsak offered up first.

"I scared myself," Maura admitted.

"You ok Maura?" asked Frost wanting to hear from the ME himself.

"I'm ok Barry," she answered. "Although I'd like to know what you just reacted to," she said directing that to Jane.

Jane knew they'd have to ask eventually so she knelt down in front of Maura and took her hands again. "Maura, why didn't you tell me the guy had a gun?"

Maura looked at Jane with a completely confused look. "What gun?"

Jane, not really knowing the details, turned to look at Korsak.

"Maura, the man who tried to attack you also fired a gun at you. There are witnesses to hearing the gunshot and we have recovered a bullet from a car in the parking garage."

"I didn't...know... didn't see..." Maura started but couldn't seem to finish the thoughts. She suddenly felt very light headed and the room seemed to start to spin. "Jane..." Maura's voice suddenly spiked in tension and panic.

Before Jane could completely react to the shift in Maura's demeanor, everything for Maura faded to black with the last thing she half heard was Jane crying out her name.

R&I

_"I don't think she should be alone tonight."_

_"She won't be."_

_"Jane, we will rush the ballistics on the bullet we recovered and Frost has copies of all the mall security footage. Between those two things we should be able to get an idea of who this guy is."_

_"Excuse me, Detective? I think she's coming around."_

_"Maura?"_

_"Maura can you hear me? Open your eyes for me."_

Maura had started to hear snippets of conversation. She heard things before she really started to feel things. But slowly voices and sounds were starting to sound clear. She could even start to distinguish different tones and thought she recognized some of the voices. She was almost certain she heard Jane saying her name.

_"Come on Maur, I need you to wake up. Open your eyes."_

She was sure she heard that. And she understood it. Jane. Jane was asking her to wake up. From what and where was still a complete mystery to Maura but she knew that voice and she very much wanted to do as Jane asked. She concentrated as hard as she could and tried to get her eyes to respond.

Slowly Maura's eyes started to flutter open.

"That's right," Jane's voice said. Maura was suddenly struck at how soft and reassuring Jane's voice could sound. "Open your eyes all the way for us. You're ok. I promise. Just open your eyes."

The blinking and fluttering of Maura's eyes increased until she was finally able to open them fully and keep them open. She looked around confused that Jane, Vince, Barry and a man in an EMT uniform were all hovering over her. She was still unsure of exactly what was going on.

"Jane?" Maura asked in a soft, weak voice.

"Hey," Jane tried to reassure her. "It's ok. You just fainted."

_Fainted. Had I fainted?_ Maura tried to let all her senses catch up to the moment. Slowly things were sinking in. She could suddenly hear everything clearly without the ringing that had been in her head before. Her eyes had adjusted to the light and were now looking around taking in her location and surroundings. Her entire body had been tingling but that sensation was fading and now all she felt was the weight of herself laying down on something.

_The mall. Mugging. Gunshot._ Suddenly it all caught up to Maura. It was instantaneous and from the change in Maura's facial expression Jane was certain she was recalling the events of earlier in the evening.

"It's ok Maura. You are safe. I'm right here," Jane said as she reached down and took Maura's hand in hers. She hoped the tactile contact would help calm Maura down.

"I fainted," Maura said more as a statement than a question.

"Yes you did," Jane answered.

"I was mugged," she said again more as a statement confirming a memory than a question.

"You were almost mugged. You kicked the guy's ass," she answered and didn't hide the pride in how Maura had handled herself.

"He shot at me?" This was the first real question she asked. That she still didn't understand. That she couldn't recall but from the look on everyone's face it appeared to be true.

Jane squeezed Maura's hand. "Apparently yes. Several witnesses said he tried to shoot at you after you ran off. We did recover a bullet from a car."

Maura let that information sink in for a minute without saying anything. At this stage Jane wasn't going to push Maura into any conversation about what happened. She was letting Maura ask, or not ask, the questions. She didn't want to upset Maura more than she already was.

"Do you have an idea as to who the guy was?" Maura asked.

Jane shook her head, "Not yet. But we have parking garage footage as well as some video from a few of the stores you were in and the recovered bullet. We are hoping to get an ID from one of those."

"I saw him," she said.

"You told me you did," Jane replied.

"I can describe him," she offered. She knew it was best for her to get the description out while she could still picture the guy. "Sketch artist?" She didn't want to forget.

Jane looked into Maura's eyes. She wasn't sure Maura was up for that right away.

"It may help us with a positive ID Jane," Korsak said gently. He didn't want to push Maura too hard but he had already been warned by mall security that their video locations and video quality was not the greatest. They weren't sure the police would get a good facial image to run through facial recognition. He just hadn't had a chance to tell Jane this yet.

Jane looked to Maura again. "Are you ready for that? I can take you home and we can do the sketch artist thing in the morning," she offered.

"I think, for accuracy, I think I need to sit with a sketch artist tonight," Maura admitted. She was afraid that by morning her ability to recall details would have faded.

"You're sure?" Jane's protective nature with Maura was on full alert.

Maura nodded. Jane turned to Frost. "Can you see if Sara can meet us at the station now?"

Frost nodded and pulled out his phone walking away from the group to contact the best sketch artist the department had on staff.

"Jane?" Maura asked. "Can you help me sit up?"

Jane nodded. Slowly Jane pulled Maura's arm to help her upper body come away from the gurney she was lying on. She instantly put her other hand on Maura's back to help guide and support her on her way to sitting up. Once Maura got into an upright position the EMT raised the gurney so she could lean back but stay upright. That helped her lightheadedness.

"You should take it easy Dr. Isles," the EMT said to her as he went to do a quick check of Maura's vitals. Jane pulled away to give the EMT the space to double check Maura.

"Jane, Sara is on her way to the station right now. She will be waiting for you and Maura," Frost said as he rejoined the group.

"Is she alright to get up?" Jane asked the EMT who had finished his check on Maura's vitals.

"Your vitals are stable," he said to Maura. "I recommend that you don't try to move too quickly for a while. And I will caution you that some people get sick after they faint. So if you are feeling nauseous at all it is most likely a side effect of the fainting spell."

Maura didn't bother to explain to the EMT that she had fainted before so she was aware of how her body usually reacted during its recovery. "Thank you. Jane, will you drive me to the station?" she asked. She didn't think she should be driving yet but more importantly she really didn't want to be alone.

"Of course," Jane said.

"Maura, we'll get your car back to your house," Korsak offered. Frost nodded his agreement as he knew he would help that part along with Korsak.

"Vince, that would be appreciated," Maura said with a kind smile for the older detective.

"She's staying with me tonight," Jane told them. "If you find anything out we'll be at my place as soon as we are done at the station."

Korsak nodded. He knew unless it was a major issue he would just keep all the preliminaries and details for Jane to review in the morning. Maura needed to sleep and not be disturbed tonight.

Jane held out her hand to help Maura stand up. She slowly stood up and made sure she wasn't going to have any issues walking. Once she was sure she was ready she turned to Korsak and Frost. "Thank you both for coming out here tonight. Both of you. It really means alot to me."

Both men smiled. They each cared a great deal for Maura and would do anything for her. "I'm just glad that you are ok," Frost was the first to respond but he spoke for Korsak as well. Each man carefully approached the doctor and gave her a hug.

"I'm ready," Maura said to Jane and they slowly made their way to Jane's car.

R&I

"Come on Maur, let's get you into bed," Jane said softly as she and the ME entered Jane's apartment.

The session with Sara had been productive. Maura was able to not only recall in very specific detail the face of her mugger but she was also able to describe her recollections to Sara with ease. Jane knew all too often witnesses were able to have a good idea about the visual description of a suspect but struggled with describing what was in their heads. Sara was the best Jane had seen at asking the right kind of questions to help witnesses give details she could work with.

However, with Maura, Sara didn't have to ask many questions at all. She had simply listened to Maura as she describe the facial features as she recalled them. They had created a composite sketch of the mugger fairly quickly and Sara told Jane it had been the best process with a witness she had ever had. Jane looked at the sketch of Maura's would be attacker and silently vowed to beat the shit out of him when they caught up to him.

Jane made sure copies of the sketch was distributed to the officers starting the graveyard shift and then left it on her desk. She would have Frost start the facial recognition process in the morning. She was ready to get Maura back to her place and get settled. She realized about halfway through the sketching exercise that the events of the day were catching up to Maura.

"I'm..." Maura started but Jane cut her off.

"You are getting changed and you are getting into bed. Period. I am going to order us some food because you need to eat something but until it is delivered you are going to stretch out in bed and try to relax. After we eat you are going to bed. You've had a hell of a day and you need to rest."

Maura looked at Jane and seemed a little thrown by how pushy Jane sounded. She really hadn't encountered this side of Jane's personality too often. Jane could be beyond stubborn when it came to things about herself but she was usually extremely patient with others. Hearing the resolve in Jane's voice left Maura at a temporary loss. Part of her wanted to object but deep down she knew Jane was right so she conceded.

"Ok," she said but looked up at Jane. "Will you stay with me though?"

The look that Jane saw creep across Maura's face nearly broke her heart. Scared. Vulnerable. She reached out and placed her hand on Maura's shoulder. "Of course. I won't leave you alone tonight," she said with a smile.

The two headed into straight into Jane's bedroom and Jane rooted around in a drawer to get Maura her set of pajamas. Each had a decent supply of clothes at the other's place for nights when dinner or movies turned into sleepovers. Jane handed Maura's pajamas to her. "You get changed and I'm going to order food. Is pizza ok?"

Maura nodded to the pizza. She wasn't really hungry so she didn't have a preference. She watched Jane step out of the bedroom but noticed that Jane didn't close her bedroom door all the way. She also noted that Jane stayed in the hallway to make the phone call for pizza. The gesture, Maura knew Jane was trying not to be completely cut off from her, was extremely sweet and for some reason made Maura's eyes tear up. She blinked away the tears and got changed. By the time Jane rejoined her, she had already climbed into Jane's bed and claimed her side.

"Food is ordered and Frankie is coming by to get Jo for the night," she said. She wasn't comfortable leaving Maura alone to even take Jo out for her nightly walk. "I sent a text to Ma and asked her to go over and feed Bass for you tonight. She said she is doing it right now."

Jane's actions in arranging care for both their pets touched Maura in a way she wasn't expecting and she had to fight back tears again. For some reason the events of the night had made her more emotional than normal.

"Maur? You ok?" Jane asked softly.

Maura nodded but didn't speak for a minute. Jane just patiently waited. "I'm sorry. Small things just seem to be making me almost cry right now," she said trying to explain herself to Jane.

"Don't apologize to me," Jane said. "Maura, you've been through an ordeal today and it's bound to have you a little more emotional. It's ok. Really, it is."

"Thank you," Maura said.

"For?" Jane asked.

"For everything today. For racing to get to me. I mean I don't even want to know how many traffic laws you broke. For staying with me tonight. I just really don't want to be alone. Generally just thanks for caring about what happens to me," she said. Jane was the best friend she had ever had and Maura sometimes felt Jane just continually proved that to her.

Jane wasn't sure how to respond to what Maura said. She had the instinct to just scoop the woman into her arms and hold onto her but she was fighting that instinct as hard as she could. What she did instead was walk over to the bed and gently tuck the comforter around the ME.

"Try to rest for a bit. The pizza will be here soon," she said. She then went to her dresser to pull out some clothes that she was going to change into and she headed into the bathroom. Like the bedroom door earlier, she didn't close the bathroom door all the way. She wanted Maura to absolutely certain she was close by.

When Jane emerged from the bathroom she found Maura had drifted asleep. Jane knew Maura wasn't going to be able to fight the exhaustion she could see taking over her friend. Instead of joining her in bed, she would need to get up for the pizza and for Frankie still, Jane just simply sat in the chair that was across the room. She was perfectly content sitting and watching over Maura as she slept. She wasn't leaving the room until there were knocks on her front door.

R&I

"No..."

"No please..."

It wasn't the soft whimpers that woke up Jane. It was the shaking of the bed from Maura tossing about that did it.

Jane had sat watching over the sleeping blonde until she did hear the first of two knocks she expected on her front door. She went to answer the door making sure she kept the bedroom door open in case Maura woke up and needed Jane quickly.

The knocker was the pizza guy. Jane had the money and tip all ready to go so that task took no time at all. She was about to close the door behind the pizza guy when she heard Frankie coming up the stairs. She held the door open for him as he came into her apartment.

They had talked for a few minutes and Jane had gotten him caught up on the attempted mugging Maura had been through. Frankie was glad to take Jo for the night knowing now why Jane hadn't wanted to be away from the apartment to take Jo for her nightly walk. After asking Jane to tell Maura he was glad she was ok and that he would call her in the morning, Frankie left Jane to care for Maura for the rest of the night.

Jane had checked in on Maura to see if she had stirred but she hadn't. As much as she was sure Maura needed to eat she wasn't about to interrupt the sleep that had found her. So, Jane scarfed down three slices of pizza and put the rest away. She could always reheat it if Maura woke up and was hungry later.

After that, Jane simply went into the bedroom and climbed into the bed claiming her side and desperately trying not to wake Maura. She settled in and within seconds Maura had shifted herself into Jane burrowing as close as she could to the detective. She hadn't even woken up to do this. She just seemed to gravitate to the brunette.

This caused urges and impulses to course through the detective but she knew she needed to keep her desires at bay. This was her best friend. Her best friend who had been through a trauma. Had been close to getting seriously hurt. Jane knew this was no time to let herself entertain romantic notions. That would just be wrong.

Instead, for the third time that night, Jane placed a gentle kiss onto Maura's forehead and let the woman completely settle into her. She would be strong and be there for the doctor. That was, after all, what friends did for each other in times of need. She listened to Maura's deep, even breathing and soon found the rhythm served as her own personal lullaby effectively bringing sleep to her as well.

Until, that was, Maura started having a nightmare. The jostling of the bed was what woke Jane up. Then she heard Maura's muffled cries.

"No..."

"Maura," Jane whispered quietly. She shifted to a hovering position over Maura in an attempt to gently pull her out of her dream state. "It's alright Maur. It's just a dream."

Jane hadn't wanted to shake Maura awake. She knew that always made things worse for her when people tried to do that to her. Instead she just tried to talk Maura awake. Calm. Reassuring. Soft. Just loud enough to slowly pull Maura back from the edge.

Finally, it worked.

"Jane..." Maura half whispered with eyes still closed.

"I'm right here," she answered. "I won't let anything happen to you. Ever."

Maura let her eyes drift open and even in the dark Jane made out the prettiest hazel she would ever know. Maura's eyes locked onto Jane's with such intensity Jane was afraid to even blink. She knew Maura was trying to make sure Jane was real. Was really there. That she was really safe. Jane, based on her own experience, knew Maura just needed a minute. And a minute was what she was going to give the woman.

Jane had expected the nightmare. It was one of the reasons she hadn't wanted to even leave Maura to walk her dog or close a bedroom or bathroom door all the way. She had expected Maura's mind to finally replay the events of the night but also play around with the fear those events generated. So she was ready for Maura and her nightmare.

But she wasn't ready in any way for what happened next. With eyes still locked into each other, Jane found herself suddenly pulled into a kiss from Maura. It had been so unexpected that Jane hadn't even kissed back. She was too stunned and too frozen in place to have managed that feat.

It wasn't until Maura tried to seal their connection a second time that Jane's body reacted. Reacted to the feel of soft lips pressed wantonly against her own. Lips demanding reciprocation and acknowledgement of the current state of affairs.

For a brief moment, Jane wanted to be the type of friend that stopped what was occurring between the two. The type of friend that knew this was a mistake. A simple matter of an emotional reaction to a traumatic experience. The type of friend who would never take advantage of someone in a vulnerable and weakened state merely to satisfy a deep personal need. A personal desire. The type of friend strong enough to do what was right rather than what was selfish.

But Jane, as it turned out, just wasn't that kind of friend. Not that night at least. Instead of fighting and resisting the growing intensity of the kiss they had been sharing, Jane felt herself succumb to the moment. Felt herself give into the passion. Let herself slip into the pure enjoyment of a moment she had dreamt about for so long.

Instead of stopping, Jane pulled Maura in closer and heightened the fervor of the moment. Both ladies quickly got lost in each other.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

**May 19th**

Morning slowly started to greet the slumbering detective. Its light had already penetrated through the blinds on the windows of her bedroom. It had driven out the darkness of the night and was doing what it could to get the woman sleeping in the bed to awaken and greet a new day. Try as she did to fight it, Jane found that she was slowly bringing herself back into the here and now.

She hadn't opened her eyes yet. She was going to fight that last hold on sleep for as long as she could. But she was awake. Awake in the sense that she knew it was morning and she would have to be getting up soon. But what time it was or how soon that process needed to start was still a slight mystery.

Jane's mind seemed to wake up faster than her body because it quickly raced back to images of what had transpired the night before. Laying there with her eyes still closed a smile crept across her face as she allowed herself to remember her encounter with Maura from the previous night. Maura's lips on hers. A softness better than anything she had ever imagined. The taste of Maura's skin on her tongue as she covered every possible inch of flesh she could. The sounds Maura let slip that were a melody unlike anything she had ever heard before.

Maura.

Jane let her hand stretch slowly out across the bed. She tentatively felt around in the space next to her and she slowly became aware of what she felt. Or more accurately didn't feel. She didn't need to explore too long to understand that she was alone in her bed. The sheets beside her were stone cold and as she was more and more cognitively aware of her surroundings she was sure she was in her room alone.

The realization of being alone is what finally got Jane to open her eyes. Somehow even though she was fully aware that the bed held only her she seemed to have a morbid need to receive visual confirmation. Opening her eyes she turned over and couldn't stop the sigh as her eyes now officially acknowledged what her body had already known.

Maura was gone.

Jane lay in bed for a minute and thought about the night before. For a brief moment she wondered if it had merely been a dream. That moment didn't last long as Jane realized quickly that she was in bed naked. That seemed to answer that question as she knew she hadn't started out the night that way.

She let her eyes roam around her room and saw all the evidence she needed to confirm that she had in fact slept with Maura last night. Her clothes- t-shirt, shorts and even underwear- were randomly scattered on the floor around the bed. She had vague recollections of both herself and Maura haphazardly throwing the articles of clothing that were stripped off into their current resting places while in the midst of passion.

She had slept with Maura.

She wanted to rejoice. To celebrate. To allow the moment to have the full effect she had always imagined if this moment were to ever come. But she couldn't rejoice. Couldn't celebrate. Not when she was alone. Not when her bed suddenly felt bigger than it ever had felt before because of its emptiness. This was never how Jane imagined their first morning after would be.

Maura was gone.

Jane closed her eyes and sighed. She knew she didn't have to get out of bed and check the rest of the apartment to confirm that Maura was gone. Something in her gut told her Maura wasn't simply in the bathroom or the kitchen. She knew Maura was gone. But like needing to open her eyes to confirm Maura wasn't in bed next to her she knew she was about to get up and do the obligatory check of the rooms in her apartment looking for what she knew wasn't going to be there.

"Shit," she let slip out into the empty room.

She threw off the covers of the bed and gathered the articles of clothing she had shed earlier. Once dressed, she slowly made the rounds to satisfy her curiosity. And as she checked each room and indeed found each room completely empty the ache she felt in the pit of her stomach just seemed to get stronger and stronger.

Jane made it through all the rooms and couldn't find any evidence of Maura. It wasn't until she got into the kitchen that she let herself even acknowledge the fact that there wasn't even a note. Nothing. Not an 'I needed to go home'. Not an 'I need time to think'. Not even an 'I wish last night didn't happen'. Clearly, any, if not all, of those sentiments currently applied. To Jane the nothingness said plenty.

The place was just empty. And as it all started to really catch up to the detective, an emptiness crept into her heart and she suddenly found it overwhelming. Jane wasn't used to emotional reactions and outbursts. She usually kept tight controls over all her emotions. That was probably why it took her a minute to realize she was crying. But once that knowledge sank in she let it all consume her as she sank down onto the floor in her kitchen and let the tears come without resistance.

R&I

**_Earlier_**

Maura blinked her eyes open and was greeted with the shadings of a dark room. She had to take a minute to remember where that dark room put her. She let her eyes blink a few more times and slowly she started to adjust to the lack of light in the room. Jane's room. Jane's bed. Slowly the details were starting to come back to her.

She had been attacked. Or, more accurately, she had been a victim of an attempted mugging. She remembered the altercation in the parking garage at the mall and remembered that she had managed to get away from her would be attacker. She was safe. She let that sink in a little. She really was safe.

But then she felt something stir next to her and she felt herself tense for a minute. She half smiled when she realized it was just Jane and she wasn't in any danger. She had stayed with Jane so she wouldn't be alone. Letting her mind calm down something else suddenly occurred to her. Jane. She had a sudden image of kissing Jane last night. She began to wonder if that had even happened.

That question seemed quickly answered when she felt Jane's arm drape itself across her stomach. It wasn't so much the arm draping over her, as that would occur from time to time when the two shared a bed, but rather it was the fact that Maura was now suddenly aware that the body contact between her and Jane was skin on skin contact. That seemed to shock her now completely awake.

She became very aware that she was in bed with Jane and she was naked. Turning her head towards the sleeping detective for the first time since waking up Maura was able to confirm what she was already pretty sure of. Jane was naked as well. That was all it took for the floodgates of Maura's memory to open and the previous night replayed itself.

Jane putting Maura to bed. Maura waking up from a nightmare. Jane's soothing voice calming her down. Maura leaning in to kiss Jane. Jane not kissing back. Maura trying one more time. Jane giving in. Kissing. Lots and lots of kissing. Clothes being removed. Hands exploring. Mouths exploring. Passion raising. Needs being fulfilled. Gasps for breath and moans of pleasure. Cries out to the deities. Desires finally being put to rest.

All of it came rushing back to Maura. It overwhelmed her quite unexpectedly. In that moment she did not know if she was happy or sad. Content or confused. Relieved or scared. Too many emotions were happening all at the same time and she needed it all to stop. From out of nowhere the need to be anywhere but where she was in that moment overtook Maura.

She had to get out that bed. Out of Jane's apartment. It wasn't a desire as much as it was a palpable need. As if on cue, Jane stirred again and shifted enough for Maura to extract herself from Jane's bed without waking the detective. Given her current mental state that was the absolute last thing she had wanted to happen.

She gently slipped out of the bed and managed to find her clothes. Her dressed as quickly and as quietly as she could. She even grabbed her clothes from the day before. She wasn't sure why. She seemed to be acting on pure instinct. Knowing she had everything she had brought over to Jane's from the night before she tiptoed out of the bedroom into the living room where she went to find her purse, her phone and her car keys.

Her car. It was at her house. Korsak had offered to get Maura's car to her house for her after the incident at the mall. She would have to call for a cab. She did one quick look around Jane's apartment and made a quiet exit out the front door. She walked down the stairs and it wasn't until she was outside on the stoop that she used her phone to look up the number of a taxi service.

She called the number and requested a cab. Given the hour she was in luck. The dispatcher said a taxi would be there in about five minutes. Maura disconnected the phone and worked to get her shoes onto her feet. She then sat on the stoop hoping the taxi would be early. The last thing she needed in that moment was Jane finding her sitting outside her apartment. She was already feeling awful for sneaking out without an explanation.

But in that moment, Maura was only now certain of one thing. She was certain she had no explanation for what had happened or for her reaction to it. For right now, she had nothing she could offer to Jane that made any sense.

She saw the taxi round the corner and breathed a sigh of relief. Except for telling the driver the address of her house Maura never said another word. She just stared out the window as the cab drove through the quiet streets of Boston.

R&I

How long Jane sat on her kitchen floor crying she was unsure. But the ringing of her phone was the first noise outside her own whimpers she had heard that morning. She let a fleeting hope that it was Maura calling pass through her as she looked down and saw it was Frost. Hope could be such a cruel thing.

"Rizzoli," Jane answered trying desperately to hide the hurt and emotions she was still feeling.

"Jane, I hope I'm not waking you but I think you need to come down here," Frost said after hearing Jane answer the phone.

"What's going on?" Jane asked.

"The ballistics from that bullet we recovered from the parking garage came back and we have a match," Frost answered.

Jane let her mind drift to the events of the previous day and the attempted mugging of Maura. If there was a ballistics match then robbery could just have a warrant issued for the owner of the gun and they could try to find the suspect.

"You should let Robbery know you have a match," Jane said. "Doug's the primary for this." She couldn't fight the need to detach herself from everything in that moment.

Frost was quiet for a minute. In an instant he realized something was wrong. He finally let himself hear Jane's tone. That should have been his first clue. But the fact that she had just suggested anything involving Maura be passed off to another team wasn't anything he ever thought he would hear from Jane. Ever.

"Jane? Did you just say to turn the match over to Robbery?" Maybe he just heard her wrong.

Korsak, who had also come in early to help work on Maura's mugging case, heard both what Frost had said and his tone. He looked up at Frost who now had a very perplexed look on his face. His entire attention was now on Frost's phone call to Jane.

"If you have a match from ballistics just turn the information over to Doug and his team. The match and the composite sketch should be enough to get an arrest warrant." Jane wasn't in the mood for talking about anything right now. In fact, she was just about to hang up the phone when she heard Frost speak again.

"Jane, it's just not that simple. The ballistics from the bullet that was shot at Maura," he couldn't help emphasize the 'at Maura' part almost as if he needed to clarify that they were discussing her best friend, "matches the ballistics from our three murders. It's the same 9 millimeter."

Jane didn't say a word.

Frost looked at Korsak who hadn't stopped staring at him. Both men were now utterly confused.

"Jane, Maura's attacker, he wasn't a random mugger. He is our murder suspect."

Jane still didn't say a word.

Silence seemed to fill both Jane's apartment and the station's bullpen.

And then, finally, "I'm coming in," Jane replied and disconnected the phone without any further explanation.

Frost sat staring at his phone for a minute. He then turned to Korsak. "What the hell was that all about?"

Korsak shrugged. He hadn't heard Jane's end of the conversation but he had seen the look on Frost's face. Whatever this was he knew it wasn't good.

Before putting down her phone to go grab a quick shower Jane typed out a message. She hesitated before hitting send and looked down at the message.

_Can we talk? J_

She wasn't sure if she should hit send or not. As she stared at her screen she couldn't help but think about the fact that Maura left without a single word. A flash of hurt rushed through her and she slowly deleted the message instead of sending it. She put down the phone and headed into her bedroom to get cleaned up. She needed to get to the station.

R&I

Information was a commodity on the street. There could never be an overestimation on the power or value of information. A possessor of information, especially on the street, had the potential to write his own ticket. Depending, of course, on the quality, subject and reliability of that information. A seeker of information could easily find himself having to relinquish accumulated favors or acquiring a level of debt that was usually avoided. But sometimes, the need for information outweighed the desire to stay out of any indebtedness.

This was the position Rondo had found himself in. He was a seeker of information. It wasn't necessarily a role he was used to. During his long life on the streets he had been viewed by most as a possessor of knowledge and information. Someone others could go to and get what they needed. At a price.

Rondo's personal amassed collection of favors and debts was part of how he managed as well on the streets as he did. There wasn't anyone who lived in that world that didn't owe him some kind of favor or debt. Some big. Most small. But he had his methods for accumulating those favors that ultimately ensured his lifestyle and comfort level. And at times, it ensured his personal safety.

So for him to be in the unique position of being a seeker of information, he was definitely outside his comfort level. But he wasn't going to let that stop him. He was seeking extremely important information at the moment. As he traveled to where he was heading he fully understood what he was about to be asking and what it was about to cost him. But it would absolutely be worth it.

The news of the doctor's attack at the mall had sped through the streets like lightning. Rondo always called it 'street speed'. He once tried to tell Jane that there was no faster means of communication than the streets. The minute he heard that the doctor had been attacked he set out to see if he could gather any information to help.

The doctor had a special place in Rondo's heart. Outside of his detective, the doctor was the first person he had encountered in a long time who looked at him and treated him as a man. Not a man on the streets. But a man. The concern and respect the doctor had shown Rondo had always meant a great deal to him. He owed his relationship with the doctor to his detective.

Vanilla.

He teased and innocently flirted with his detective. After all, she was a fine looking lady. But Rondo's feelings for her went beyond flirtation and teasing. He considered the detective a friend. And Rondo never allowed himself to have friends. Friends were a luxury he just couldn't let himself have as he lived on the street.

But Jane had somehow just managed to penetrate into his life. She was reliable and she had proven over time that she genuinely cared about him. She allowed him to flirt with her. She joked back but she never took it away from him. Again, he wasn't sure if she realized how much the flirting meant to him. How much just the banter allowed him to feel more like a man than an insignificant bum. He thought she did. He was pretty sure that was why she let him continually refer to her as 'Vanilla'. He was pretty sure she did that just for him.

She let him set the boundaries on how much or how little help he took from her without ever pushing for more or trying to do more than he was willing to allow. As close to that she ever got would be the times she would slip money in his pockets when he would refuse to take it from her. He was surprised to find money the first time she ever did it. After that, it became their little game. She pretended she didn't give him anything. He pretended he never found it. Neither forced the other to acknowledge the gesture. It never seemed necessary.

She also didn't pry. She respected him enough to never ask for his life story. The quickest way to get him to walk away from someone was to have questions asked of him about his past. He never liked talking about it. He hated how people reacted when he did. The looks they would get as he spoke. But his detective, well she never asked. Because of that she had never given him that look. That pitiful look that always felt like a judgement on what had gone wrong in his life. She let him just be Rondo. With every interaction he had with the detective that was always just enough for her.

When Rondo first met the doctor he didn't know what to expect. By that time he had come to respect and admire the detective's ability to read people and he didn't know of a better judge of character than Jane. So, it said something to him that she had befriended the doctor. In fact, it spoke volumes. Rondo had noticed that his detective tended to keep to herself. She called very few people friend and he knew if someone became a friend of Jane's that meant something.

But Rondo's first interaction with the doctor left him confused. He considered himself a smart man but he was street smart more than he was book smart. The doctor, as it turned out, was the complete opposite. Book smart but in no way street smart. He was tempted to believe that they would never have anything in common and that there was no way that they would ever understand each other.

Then it happened. He found himself in a position where he saw what Jane must have seen within the doctor. And suddenly he understood her. It was a moment. An act so small most others wouldn't have even paid any attention to it but living on the streets had taught Rondo to pay attention to everything. Especially the small things. So he saw it and it had made all the difference.

After that moment, he added the doctor to his list of friends. Sometimes he was shocked that he even had a list. But there were now two and two made a list. A detective and a doctor. Not a bad combination. The combination of those specific two made Rondo feel it was worth the risks of maintaining a friendship. Most definitely worth it.

The doctor was as good about letting him dictate what help he would or wouldn't take as Jane had been. She, too, never forced anything on him. Which, he always thought, was harder for her than the detective. He knew the doctor had means. She could throw money at him to try to take him from his life on the street. But she never tried. Never attempted pull him from where he was comfortable. From where he wanted to be. And that, too, had earned his eternal respect.

Over the years, Rondo had come to realize that his detective cared more for the doctor than just as a friend. He was sure she was in love with the doctor. All things considered, he couldn't blame the woman. She never talked about it and he respected Jane too much to bring it up but he saw it. Saw the way she looked at the doctor. Saw the way she protected the doctor. As far as he was concerned it was pretty hard to miss.

What he wasn't sure of was how the doctor felt about the detective. He knew they were close friends. He knew she saw Jane and her entire family as her own family. There were times he thought she could be in love with Jane. But he was never completely sure. He couldn't read the ME as well as he could read the detective. But, if he was a betting man he would bet everything he owned that the doctor loved the detective too.

So when it came out that someone had tried to hurt the doctor, his friend, Rondo knew he needed to try to help his detective. Ignoring every street instinct the man had, he found himself turning into a seeker of knowledge and information. He knew where to go looking for it and he knew it would cost him. But it was for his detective. For her doctor. His friends. That was worth the price.

Or at least that was what he was telling himself as he walked across the alleyway on his way to get the answers he knew the detective desperately needed.

R&I

Maura stepped out of the shower just as upset and tense as she had been before she entered the spraying hot water. Normally, her shower offered solace and comfort when she was trying to work through an issue. She usually found that her thoughts came more clearly to her as the hot water from the turbo jet shower head worked its magic across her shoulder and back muscles.

But this morning there seemed to be no relief in order. Maura wondered for a brief moment if even her shower understood that she didn't deserve a break. Didn't deserve to relax or be let off the hook. Not after what she had done. Instead of working out her concerns like she hoped all that was currently happening were flashes back to the night before. And to what she did that morning.

She left Jane. Just left her. No note. Nothing. Snuck out in the dead of the night like she was sneaking away to hide the shame of it all. But she hadn't been ashamed of what had happened between them. She had been overwhelmed by it. What she was currently ashamed of was her actions from this morning.

She was struggling to make sense of what she had done. Running was the last thing she ever thought she would do. Especially with Jane. If anything when she had run scenarios like last night through her mind it was always Jane who she worried would run. Never her. And yet, here she was. Hiding from the single most important person in her life. Hiding in shame and with deep regret.

She wrapped herself up in a towel and moved over to the vanity. Looking in the mirror was hard for her for the first time in years. What had she done? How could she have done that to Jane? How was Jane ever going to want to speak with her again after she just ran off? Staring into the mirror she let the one question that was screaming within her head the loudest cross her lips.

"Why?" she asked the reflection in the mirror somehow hoping an answer would follow. None was heard.

She loved Jane. She had feelings for Jane for years. There was always an attraction. That was immediate. Instant. The minute that she had met Jane there was no mistaking the beauty of the woman. It took Maura completely by surprise. Never in her life had she been attracted to another woman before. But there was just something about Jane that was absolutely undeniable.

Then she got to know the woman. That was all it took. If her beauty hadn't been enough to do the trick, Jane herself was certainly more than enough to seal the deal. Maura had never known anyone quite like Jane. She projected this tough as nails demeanor and while that was definitely true, there was a purity in her heart and soul that was just so compelling for Maura. The devotion and loyalty Jane had for her family and friends was something Maura had never seen in another person before.

Jane seemed to take to Maura. They started talking about more than just autopsies and crime scenes. Jane seemed to continually wander down to the morgue just to see Maura and say hi. She never had an agenda or wanted something. She was just trying to get to know the ME. Something very few people had even tried doing in her life up to that point.

What was more unbelievable than Jane making an effort to befriend the ME was how comfortable and relaxed Maura had felt around Jane. Maura was completely aware of her unease towards others. It was one of the reasons she had chosen pathology as her career path. She was more comfortable around dead people than live ones. That had been the case with every single person she met. Except Jane.

She didn't feel anxious around Jane. She didn't think she rambled on as much as she would with others. When she did ramble on about something what struck her was that Jane never seemed to mind it when she did. That seemed to be where she lost most people when they tried to get to know her. Once she would start her nervous over-explanations in the most scientific of terms, most people seemed to end their attempt to befriend the woman.

Jane was different. She seemed to listen. Even when Maura was sure that she didn't understand the vast majority of the things she was saying, Jane still listened. And it wasn't that polite listening. She seemed, for the most part, actually interested in the things that Maura was saying.

The day Jane came down to the morgue to ask Maura if she wanted to go see a movie that weekend had been one of the best days of the ME's life. It had been completely unexpected and Maura had been so thrown by the offer she almost messed it all up by not saying an immediate yes. But finally she had agreed and just like that, Jane and Maura were friends.

Maura was completely taken with Jane. Having never been attracted to another woman before Maura in the beginning chalked up her feelings to merely a confusion about the intensity of their friendship. She thought maybe since it had been a long time since anyone had shown a sincere interest in her that maybe it wasn't a romantic love she was feeling but a friendship love. She had difficulties sometimes understanding social norms and interactions with people and there was a decent possibility she could have been misreading the new friendship with Jane.

That rationalization seemed to appease her for awhile. But eventually she lost the right to just believe that her feelings for the detective stopped at friendship. When the physical attraction and desire for Jane had not abated over the course of time she knew it was something else. It took her awhile to get there but she knew she had fallen in love with the detective.

But by this time Jane had basically taken Maura into her family and given her the first real sense of belonging she had ever had. The entire Rizzoli clan had embraced the woman and she had found a family. One that actually liked her, talked with her and wanted to spend time with her. What Jane had given her was something Maura could never truly measure but would always be grateful for.

It was when she thought about changing her relationship with Jane to something more than friends that the panic first hit her. Panic over losing Jane. Losing the Rizzolis. Losing her first real grounded sense of self. She had convinced herself that Jane didn't see her as anything but a friend and if she tried to act on her feelings she would lose what she had just gained. What she had so desperately needed in her life for such a long time.

So she became a coward. Too afraid to admit her feelings. Too scared to try and explore the possibility that Jane may feel the same. Fear resulted in inaction. It seemed the wise move not to mess with the status quo. Not to risk what she honestly couldn't afford to lose. So she didn't.

Until last night.

Then she did.

And it was wonderful.

Until this morning.

When she did something stupid that now had cost her the love of her life. Her friend. Her family. Her everything.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

**May 20th**

**Mass General**

Jane stood staring at Maura with disbelief. She couldn't possibly have heard Maura correctly. But looking at Maura Jane couldn't deny that the woman seemed to believe what she was saying. Maybe all she meant was a declaration about their friendship. That would make some sense to Jane. Because Maura couldn't possibly have meant she was in love with her.

Maura, sensing Jane's shock, took a step closer to Jane and repeated herself. "I do love you," she said again softly. She had heard what Frankie and Angela were saying to Jane. And she had heard Jane declare that she thought Maura didn't feel the same. Nothing could be further from the truth although Maura understood exactly why Jane felt the way that she did.

Maura knew she had hurt Jane by leaving yesterday. By not explaining anything. She owed Jane apologies and an explanation. An explanation she was now ready to try to get Jane to understand. She hadn't thought she was ever going to get the chance to do just that. The way Jane had looked at her yesterday after Rondo was shot had all but convinced Maura that she had lost Jane forever. But, the woman she loved was standing in front of her and Maura wasn't about to let her go without doing everything she could to try to make her understand what had happened.

Jane was struggling to understand what she heard from Maura. After what had happened yesterday, Jane was certain Maura blamed her for everything. She thought for sure Maura never wanted to speak with her again. So to have her walk out of a room and announce that she loved her wasn't what Jane was expecting. So she just continued to stare at Maura not really knowing what else to do. Part of her believed she was hearing things. That her mind was just playing tricks on her and Maura hadn't said anything close to 'I love you'.

As she stood trying to decipher the look on Maura's face, she was beginning to see that it matched the words she had said. But that just seemed to confuse the detective even more. None of the last thirty seconds of Jane's life seemed to fit in the realm of the previous forty eight hours. She became vaguely aware of the fact that she hadn't said anything in a rather long time but she just didn't seem to possess the ability to string together enough words to form an intelligent sentence. So, she just continue to stand and stare at Maura waiting to see what the woman would do next.

She was next aware of her mother clearing her throat. Jane had forgotten that she was even still standing there. "Jane,' she started, "Maura, why don't you both go find a quiet place to talk. I'll stay with Rondo while you do."

Maura nodded in agreement and Jane felt her head involuntarily bob up and down. Maura took another step closer to Jane but stopped when she noticed Jane tense up. She had intended to take Jane's hand to lead her somewhere but quickly rethought the hand holding piece. As she thought about it she wasn't even sure why she was going to try that. It had been an instinct but clearly that wasn't going to go over well with Jane. So instead, she shifted and started to walk down the hall hoping Jane would follow her.

It took a second but Jane's feet finally started to move and she headed down the hall following after Maura. As she walked Maura's voice and the words 'I do love you' kept bouncing around in her head. She didn't understand what Maura meant by that. Friendship love? Romantic love? She didn't want to let herself jump to any kind of conclusion. But, she had to admit it was a good sign that Maura was even willing to speak with her at all. That was more than she thought was a possibility. She soon caught up with the ME and they both walked down the hallway but neither said a word.

R&I

Maura was heading back to the atrium where she had already spent some time with Angela earlier. She had noticed it was relatively quiet and low traffic so she thought they could talk there. She wanted to be alone with Jane to have the discussion she owed the brunette and was glad to move away from the prying ears of Angela and Frankie. This was personal. Private. And a conversation she was entirely uncertain how it would go and how it would end.

Making their way to the atrium, Maura sat down on the bench and Jane followed her lead but she left more room in between them than Maura was hoping. But it was something. It was a start. Both settled into the bench but neither of them spoke for a few minutes. Neither seemed to know just where or how to start.

Jane finally broke the silence. "How is he?" She knew she was stalling but she really did want to know how Rondo was. She hadn't seen him since right after he had come out of surgery.

"Stable. His vitals have all improved over the last 24 hours and the doctors are optimistic that he could wake up any time now," Maura answered.

"Should I be worried that he hasn't woken up yet?" she asked. It did worry her. She thought he would have come around by now.

Maura shook her head. "No," was her honest answer. "The doctors aren't worried yet. Neither am I. He lost a lot of blood and then had some complications during his surgery. His body needs the rest. From everything I've seen he should make a complete recovery."

Jane turned to look at Maura for the first time since they had sat down. That was as close to a guess as Jane had ever seen the ME offer. She wondered, for a moment, if Maura even realized that she had been making a guess. Part of her wanted to point that out to the ME but she knew it was neither the time nor the place for that. So instead, she just nodded.

They sat in silence again. For the first time Jane could remember the silence was now awkward. She finally took a deep breath and started out with one of the many things she had been thinking. If she was ever going to get Maura to forgive her she needed to admit it was all her fault.

"I should have been there to protect you," Jane said so quiet Maura almost didn't hear her. She let her eyes find Maura's for the first time since they had sat down on the bench.

"Is that what you think?" Maura asked surprised by what Jane just said.

"I don't think, I know," Jane said again with conviction. It was one of the many things that was bothering her. Had she not crossed the line with Maura two nights ago, Maura wouldn't have been compelled to run off. And had she simply been able to control her desires she would have been with Maura when the suspect had tried to attack her again. She felt she could have stopped the man or at least kept Rondo from getting hurt. "If I hadn't screwed up I would have been there to protect you."

"First of all, you didn't mess anything up. That was all me. And second of all, had you been with me yesterday it just as easily could be you laying in that hospital bed right now and I just don't think I could handle that," Maura admitted. "Jane, I can't lose you."

Jane didn't act like she even registered what Maura had said. "If I hadn't messed up. If I hadn't...then maybe I would have been with you and none of this would have happened." Jane looked into Maura's eyes and was surprised not to see any anger reflecting back at her. She was sure Maura was angry at her at the very least.

"Jane, you didn't mess up," Maura said again. She wasn't sure why Jane seemed not to be hearing what she was trying to say. "That was me. I'm the one who made the mistakes. I'm the one that didn't handle any of this right. I'm the one that caused all of this. I'm so sorry," she offered.

"Please Maura. Don't apologize for things that were my fault. I let it happen and I knew I shouldn't have. I knew you were upset. I knew you weren't thinking straight. I should have stopped you when you kissed me. Instead, I took advantage of you and gave into my desire for you. Because of that, I know you don't want to be my friend anymore. I know you can't be in my life anymore. I ruined it for us and I'll never forgive myself for that," Jane finally dropped her eyes from Maura's too ashamed to try to look at her anymore.

She missed the completely shocked look on Maura's face. Missed the now completely confused look on Maura's face. "Jane?" Maura said. She was now totally thrown by what appeared to be Jane's version of the events of the last few days. Somehow Jane had decided all of this was her fault. She didn't understand that. She had been the one to hurt Jane by leaving the next morning. There wasn't anything about sleeping with Jane she had regretted. What she regretted was what she did the next morning. That was what she needed to explain to Jane. "Jane, look at me," she implored.

Jane refused to look at Maura. She just couldn't look at what she knew she had lost anymore. It wasn't until she felt a hand under her chin gently pushing her face up that she realized Maura was going to insist upon making eye contact with her again.

"Jane, I don't understand why you think this is your fault. I'm the one that ran off the next morning. I'm the one that left you without an explanation. All of this. It's all my fault." She captured Jane's gaze and refused to let Jane drop it this time.

"I didn't, and I don't, need any explanation. I already know you don't feel that way about me. I know you said you love me but I'm not talking about a friendship love. Although I managed to even mess that up. Maura, don't you see? That's why this was my fault. I knew you weren't in love with me and yet I still...I was too weak to stop it from happening when I should have."

"Jane, I do love you," Maura found herself repeating herself again not sure why Jane wasn't hearing what she kept trying to say.

"I know you have a friendship love for me. You don't have to keep telling me that. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about being in love. I know you are not in love with me. I know that's not who you are. I've known that for a long time. I was doing a good job of hiding my feelings for you until the other night. When I let myself kiss you back, that's when I crossed the line and that's when I lost you." Jane wanted to look away from Maura after admitting that but found Maura wouldn't allow her eyes to divert away from her.

"Jane Rizzoli, I need you to listen to me and really, truly hear what I am trying to explain to you. I love you. You are the best friend I have ever had. But I am in love with you. As in the I want you kind of love. As in the I want to make love to you again and again kind of love. As in the I want to spend the rest of my life with you kind of love. I love you. Deeply, passionately, desperately love you. The other night was one of the best experiences of my life until I messed everything up the next morning by leaving."

Jane looked at Maura but couldn't figure it out. Instinctually she knew the woman couldn't tell a lie. Hives and a whole vasovagal thing would happen to her and it was clear neither one of those things were happening to her. But how could she love her? It still didn't make sense. She looked at Maura and now needed to understand something.

"But you can't love me," she said as if that was suppose to clear up the entire situation between them.

"Why can't I?" Maura asked still completely confused by Jane's insistency on something that just was not true.

"I heard you. I heard what you said," Jane answered back but again in such a quiet voice Maura almost didn't hear her.

It was Maura's turn to look at Jane like Jane was crazy. "You heard me? Heard what?" she asked not having any idea of what could cause Jane to react the way she was reacting.

"I heard you tell your mother that friendship was all you could ever offer me. That's you didn't have anything against 'that' lifestyle but it wasn't who you were. I heard you tell her that if I wanted something more than friendship you would need to stop spending time with me."

The pain in Jane's tone as she said this about broke Maura's heart. She still had no idea about what conversation Jane was talking about about but it was clear that Jane was absolutely convinced she knew what she heard.

"Jane, what are you talking about? What conversation?" she couldn't remember any recent conversation with her mother that had even involved Jane.

Jane sighed. "I overheard you on the phone with your mother a while back," Jane started.

"When?" Maura interrupted trying to get an idea of when all this was supposed to have happened.

Without thinking Jane answered, "May 9th."

Maura thought for a second trying to remember where she was a couple of weeks ago. "Jane, I'm not sure what you thought you heard but I don't recall having a conversation with my mother about you. In fact, she's in Europe setting up a new installation and I haven't spoken to her since she left and that was in April."

Jane shook her head. "Not this May, last May."

"A year ago?" Maura asked and couldn't hide her shock.

"Yes," Jane answered.

"You've thought for over a year that I told my mother I could only be friends with you?" she asked trying to see if she had all of this correct.

"Yes," Jane answered again.

"You've believed for over a year that if I found out you liked me as more than a friend that I would stop being friends with you?" Maura was again trying to follow along with what Jane had said.

"Yes," Jane answered and this time Maura could hear the pain that answered caused.

"Oh Jane," she sighed and reached out and took both of Jane's hands. "How awful that must have been for you." Just the thought of how tormented Jane must have felt for over a year made tears well up in Maura's eyes.

"What would have been awful was not having you in my life. I tried. I tried and I couldn't do it. I needed you too much," she said. She didn't care how vulnerable or weak she might appear to Maura in that moment. Angela had been right. She was on the verge of losing Maura as it was so she might as well be absolutely honest with her. She really didn't have anything left to lose.

Finally, it clicked with Maura. She remembered. "So when you stopped talking to me last year, those three days. When I had to find you and ask you what was going on and you said you were just have new nightmares about Hoyt, that was when you heard what you think you heard?" Maura had never believed Jane's answer about why she had suddenly tried to pull away from her but since Jane seemed to return to normal and they started hanging out again she didn't push harder for the real answer.

"Yes," Jane acknowledged.

"Jane!" Maura said maybe a little stronger than she had intended but it got the detective's attention. "Why didn't you just say something to me?"

"I thought I would lose you," she answered honestly.

The conversation with her mother now came flooding back to Maura. She hadn't thought Jane was in the room with her when she was talking. She actually thought she was at work but maybe she was at the house. Or Jane was in the hallway at work. But she was starting to remember things now.

"Jane, I remember that conversation now. Maybe not all of it but enough to tell you that I was never, ever talking about you."

Jane looked at Maura and really didn't know what to say. "You weren't?"

Maura was trying to be as convincing with Jane as she could be. "No, I wasn't talking about you. I remember my mother was trying to talk me into going to a charity function with Garrett. I dismissed the idea. She asked what I had against Garrett besides his money and his lifestyle. I think I answered that I didn't have anything against that lifestyle but that I didn't want to be a part of it again. It wasn't who I was anymore.

"She tried to guilt me into the date by saying he expressed a desire for me which I told her all we would ever be was friends and if that wasn't good even for him then I just wouldn't see him at all anymore." She tried to recall any other details but the call had been over a year ago and she just wasn't sure about anything else. "Jane, I swear, I would never have told my mother I couldn't love you. I can't lie. Not even to her. And I was as in love with you a year ago as I am right now."

Jane couldn't believe her ears. It wasn't true? Maura loved her? Maura really loved her? "You love me?" she asked. She needed confirmation.

"Deeply," Maura stated.

That was all Jane needed to hear. Within seconds she had pulled Maura into her for a searing, passionate kiss. She tried to convey everything she felt in that kiss. The intensity of the kiss seemed to push them both to the edge. There was a desperation and need within that kiss coming from each of them. But it felt absolutely right. Right for them both. Only the need for oxygen seemed to be strong enough to pull them apart from each other in that moment.

They broke the kiss both a little breathless and each rested their forehead against the other's. Jane was happy to just be near Maura in that moment. Until a thought occurred to her and she needed to asked.

"Maura? If you love me, why did you just leave yesterday?" Jane asked not able to hide the hurt of waking up to an empty apartment after they had made love for the first time.

Maura looked at Jane and knew she owed the woman an explanation. She took a deep breath and settled back into the bench. "Jane," she started but they were interrupted by Jane's phone ringing.

Jane didn't drop her eyes from Maura's. She wanted an answer and didn't care if her phone was ringing.

"Jane, you should answer that," Maura said.

"Whoever it is can wait," Jane replied.

"Jane, it could be important," Maura said again.

Jane sighed but pulled her phone from her hip. It was Korsak. "Rizzoli," she answered still looking at Maura. As she listened she started nodding her head. "I'm coming in," she replied and disconnected the call. She looked back up at Maura, "Maura," she started but Maura interrupted her.

"You need to go. I understand," she said. She gently placed her hand on Jane's cheek and stared into her eyes. "And I know I owe you an explanation about yesterday. We can talk later. I promise. But before I let you get up off this bench I need one thing from you."

"What is that?" Jane asked.

"I need for you to tell me that you hear me and understand me when I say I love you. I don't want you leaving here believing anything other than I'm in love with you."

Jane looked into Maura's eyes and saw nothing but love reflecting back at her. She understood there was still more that they needed to discuss but in that moment she didn't doubt the sincerity of the woman in front of her. She leaned in and captured Maura's lips for a long and passionate kiss that seemed to last an eternity.

"I believe," Jane whispered before she released Maura and walked out of the atrium.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

**May 19th**

Both Frost and Korsak were on edge waiting for Jane to arrive at the station. Both were fully aware that there was something wrong with their friend and partner but they had no idea what that might be. All they both knew was that Jane's initial reaction to finding out that the attempted mugging of her best friend possibly wasn't so random and that the man responsible was their current murder suspect was in no way typical for Jane.

So when the boys heard the elevator open open and the familiar clack of Jane's boot heels on the flooring they both look a deep breath and tried to be prepared for any one of a number of curves Jane could throw their way as they worked their way through this new development in a case that already had them guessing and frustrated for the past two weeks.

"Where are we at?" Jane asked as she made her way to her desk.

Her tone. It was what struck both men. They had heard her upset, tired, frustrated, in pain and annoyed many times. But this tone was lifeless. Detached. Hollow. It startled them both and truthfully scared each of them.

They looked at each other neither really knowing what to do or say. Not sure if they should ask about it or ignore it. Jane took care of that. "Guys, what do we know?" she asked again clearly only wanting to discuss case specific information.

Frost snapped out of it first. He handed Jane the ballistics report. "The 9 millimeter pulled from the car matches the bullets taken from our three victims. Korsak and I think our suspect is now targeting Maura." He watched Jane as she read through the ballistics report trying to decipher her facial expression.

Jane turned to Korsak. "Since this bullet matches our suspect, have we asked Doug to turn over the parking garage incident investigation to us?"

He blinked. Something was really wrong between Jane and Maura. She just referred to Maura's attack as a parking garage incident. Even with Hoyt Vince hadn't ever heard Jane sound so detached about a crime or an investigation before.

"Doug was fine with us becoming the primary. He transferred all the files, statements and video over to Frost this morning but said if we need anything more or any help he was available."

Jane nodded. Doug really was an excellent detective. "Was any of the video surveillance helpful?" she said directing her attention to Frost now.

Still confused by Jane's present demeanor Frost almost stuttered his answer. "No. The mall security guys were right when they warned us about the quality of their footage. We couldn't ever get a clear shot of anyone following Maura inside the mall in between stores. As for the parking lot footage, unfortunately most of the action took place in a blind spot. We found Maura heading to her car and her running away after she managed to fight the guy off but that was about it."

Jane didn't offer any more reaction to that answer. "Any vehicle information at all?"

"Not specifically," Frost answered. "We have a window in time when the attacker could have driven out of the garage after Maura ran off but that only gets us a few vague car descriptions and no license plates or makes to ran. And that also assumed that he drove and parking in the garage. This mall has outdoor parking as well and he easily could have parked away from the garage initially."

"So, no," Jane shot back a bit more snippy than she intended to. Both Korsak and Frost just stared at her. "Sorry," she offered. And she was. She wasn't trying to take things out on the guys. They were just there and it was convenient.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Korsak braved the question.

Jane didn't offer up an answer knowing full well they both knew it was a no but she wasn't going to say it outloud. Instead of answering him she asked her next question. "Has the composite sketch Sara completed been circulated?"

Jane's non answer let both guys knew that whatever was wrong was worse than they originally thought. "Third shift all had it and it was posted and passed out at first roll this morning," Frost answered.

"Ok, I think we need to open this up further. Vince, I think we need to talk to Cavanaugh about bringing in the press. Maybe if we get that sketch out on the air we may catch a break. Nothing else seems to be working." The sketch that Sara had done was the very best picture of their suspect the three had.

Korsak nodded his agreement. "I'm pretty sure he will sign off on that. Maybe the tipline combined with the sketch will close the noose around this guy."

Jane looked down at the ballistics report again and couldn't help the question that crossed her mind. "So why the attack in the garage? Why there and why her?"

Neither man missed the fact Jane had not yet said Maura's name since she entered the bullpen. All three were quiet for a while trying to think about what the answer could be to that question. It was a good point. Why had a murder suspect who appeared to have just finished eliminating the only three people they could link to him from video footage bothered to now target the medical examiner?

That move just didn't seem to make sense. Unless.

"The video footage," Jane suddenly said out loud. Korsak and Frost just looked at Jane.

"What about it?" Frost asked. "We've watched the footage from the mall and there just isn't anything there."

"Not that footage," Jane said. "The footage from the last crime scene. The footage of the crowd we shot. Have we watched all of that yet?"

Both men shook their heads. It was on their to-do list for today but they had gotten sidetracked with Maura's attack. "Sorry Jane, we got into dealing with what happened to Maura," Frost offered.

"Frost, do you remember what we were doing while Jeff was filming that crowd footage?" Jane asked.

"We were all talking," he said.

"About?" Jane hinted.

"Bleach," Frost said and suddenly understood what Jane was hinting at. "Do you think?"

"It's the only thing that makes any sense," Jane answered.

Korsak looked at both his partners and knew he was missing something. "Ok, you both lost me," he admitted.

Frost filled him in. "When we had Jeff start filming the crowd at the last crime scene we asked Maura to help up watch people's reactions to being filmed," he started.

"Ok, I got that. I was there for that," Korsak answered back.

"As we were doing that, Maura told Jane and I that she might be onto a possible clue for the case. Which honestly would be our first decent forensic clue. She was saying that there was possibly something with the bleach substance the suspect was using to wipe away evidence. Something in the chemical makeup that may help identify the actual source as it appeared not to be simple household bleach."

"Again, ok but what does..." Korsak started but was cut off by Jane.

"What he's saying is that the murder suspect was in the crowd and heard us talking. Our guy heard us say we were close to linking a chemical to the murders."

"If he heard that, he could have decided the only way to keep us from that link would be to eliminate what he thinks is the source of that information," Frost added.

"Maura," Korsak finally caught up. "That would make the attack at the mall make more sense."

"Jane," Frost said looking at his partner. "The guy got away. I think Maura is still in danger."

Jane quietly nodded. She looked at Vince. "We need to speak with Cavanaugh. Now."

Vince nodded.

Jane turned to Frost. "Can you start watching that crowd footage? If he heard us maybe he is on video. We never did find the second guy Mau...the second guy that seemed to disappear once the filming started."

Frost again caught Jane's refusal to say Maura's name. He knew that was really bad. "I'll start reviewing the footage now. Jane," he started, "shouldn't someone tell Maura that she may be a target? Is she still at your place?"

Both men watched Jane intently for a reaction. She didn't have one. "Watch the video. We also need to figure out how Jarvis fits into all of this. Run him and see if there is anything we can use. Korsak and I will handle everything else." With that she headed off to Cavanaugh's office leaving both men to shrug their shoulders at each other.

They didn't get it. But they knew there was a major issue between Jane and Maura.

R&I

Maura needed a distraction. She still was having trouble processing what had occurred the night before or this morning. So she needed to focus her energies on something else. Even if only for temporary relief. Normally what she would do would be to immerse herself in her work. But the idea of going into the station and running the risk of seeing Jane wasn't something she was willing to do at the moment. She was absolutely sure Jane wouldn't want to have anything to do with her after this morning. And she still had no clue what she would say to her even if she did.

For the moment the station was out of the question. But it didn't completely eliminate her ability to work. She could remotely access her work PC from home and she could at least review and analyze the lab reports from Jane's current case. The suspect was potentially up to three victims and there really wasn't much evidence to work with.

The latest victim, Alex Jarvis, didn't exactly match the MO of the previous two victims but there was distinct evidence that he came into contact with the same bleach like substance used on the previous two victims. Maura knew that the ballistic report for the bullet she removed would tell Jane whether it was the same 9 millimeter used on the other two victims. But there was something about that bleach substance that Maura felt could hold an answer to the suspects identity.

Maura was close to figuring out something with the chemical composition of that bleach substance. After running an analysis on the substance once Melissa Scott's body was found Maura noticed a variance in the chemical composition from what she would consider household bleach. The chemical substance appeared to be of a higher concentration that would suggest a more industrial source. She sent the chemical residue for further analysis. That information would now all be available and she knew she could start to review and compare the results.

She was glad for the work and thought it was serve as the perfect distraction. She went into her home office and turned on her computer. As she let the computer launch the operating systems and load all the necessary programs she fought to not have thoughts of this mornings great escape creep into her mind. The guilt she continued to feel about leaving Jane's place after what had happened without even as much as a note was becoming palpable.

She reached for her phone and she considered sending Jane a text message. But she had no idea what she would say. She had no idea how to even start a message to someone who five hours earlier she snuck out of her apartment after having slept with. Her head started to spin again as she thought about it all. There were so many things she needed to deal with. Too many with absolutely no answers. It was paralyzing her.

She had slept with Jane. If she let herself think about last night she would acknowledge that it was better than she had imagined it would be. Their first time was both full of passion and desire as it was sweet and tender. It was perfect. But what did last night mean? Had Jane wanted what happen to happen as much and for as long as she had? She didn't respond the first time Maura had kissed her. Did that mean anything? If Jane had wanted things to happen why hadn't Jane ever said or done anything sooner. If no, then what was supposed to happen now? If Jane didn't want Maura in that way for more than just last night how would that affect their friendship?

That thought just lead to the other issues and concerns Maura had. No matter what was the answer about what happened last night, what she did this morning put all of that in jeopardy. Would Jane ever forgive her for leaving? Had she just ruined any chance of having something more with Jane because she left? And as hard as Maura tried to avoid the question, her mind continued to return to the biggest question of them all. Why did she leave?

Maura looked down at the phone in her hand again. All she had was questions. Not an answer was to be found. Not one that made sense yet at least. So how could she even try to reach out to Jane? What would she say? A simple 'Hi' surely wasn't going to cut it. And 'I'm sorry' just didn't seem to be enough. So instead she sent nothing. She put down her phone and tried to concentrate on the chemical properties of what appeared to be industrial bleach.

That was certainly easier to think about than the mess she had just created with Jane.

R&I

"Have the press run the composite sketch with the tipline," Cavanaugh agreed. "You are right. We need to get aggressive on this. Print media too."

Both Vince and Jane nodded. They had spent fifteen minutes getting Cavanaugh caught up on the three murders. Ballistics had come back and confirmed that the 9 millimeter that was used to kill Jarvis was the same as the one used to kill Franklin and Scott. Jane had also informed Cavanaugh that the bullet removed the from the car in the mall parking lot also matched the 9 millimeter. Maura's mugger was in fact their murder suspect.

Before getting up to leave to handle the details Jane needed one more thing from the Lieutenant. "Sir?" she asked.

"Yeah," he answered.

"Given that the suspect is still at large and it does appear that he is targeting Dr. Isles, I'd like to request a protective detail for her until our suspect is in custody."

Sean leaned back in his chair and looked at Jane. He had to admit this was an unusual request from her. He was fully aware that the Doctor and Jane were best friends. When she had first mentioned that Maura may be a target he had to admit that he just naturally assumed Jane was going to see to Maura's protection. It was what had always occurred in the past. So the detail request was rather odd.

"Has she agreed to this?" he asked. Maybe it was Maura that wanted the extra protection.

"It has not been discussed with her yet," she admitted.

Korsak watched this exchange. He was as surprised as Cavanaugh that Jane was willing to pass along Maura's protection to a police detail. Another really bad sign of trouble.

Sean shook his head which Jane interpreted as a no. "Sir please. This guy is elusive as hell and has already gone after her once. We need to keep her safe."

"Don't you usually handle Maura's safety concerns," he throw out unable to curb his curiosity.

"I need to focus on catching this guy before someone else gets hurt," was the only answer Jane offered.

Both men in that office knew there was something else going on but neither pushed any further. "I'll approve the detail," Sean started, "if Dr. Isles agrees that it's necessary and that she wants it. I won't force police protection upon my Chief ME."

Jane nodded. She knew that meant she needed to speak with Maura and that thought about made her throw up right in Sean's office. Needing to distract her mind from her stomach she spoke, "If she approves you'll set it up?"

"Yes," he said. "You are right. We need to keep her safe."

"We will run it by her and let you know her answer," Jane said as she stood up. Both Vince and Jane made their way out of Sean's office. Jane walked a few feet away from Cavanaugh's door before stopping and turning to Vince.

"If I asked you for a favor would you do it?" she asked.

Vince had never turned Jane down for anything since they had been partners. "What do you need?"

"I need you to talk to Maura about the protection detail." The flat, detached tone had returned.

"Jane, what is going on between you two?" he ventured to ask.

"Vince, will you talk to her? She needs to be told about what is going on and she needs to approve the detail."

"Don't avoid my question Jane. She's your best friend. Normally you are nothing if not belligerently insistent that you personally handle that woman's safety. Hell, just yesterday you broke speed records just to get to her and now today you want me to speak with her about that same safety? What gives Jane?"

Jane couldn't look at Vince. She couldn't tell him what happened. She couldn't answer him. Mostly because she still couldn't acknowledge the truth herself. For the truth was that she had screwed up the best relationship and friendship she had in her life when she crossed a line she shouldn't have crossed and took advantage of a scared and confused Maura. Her inability to control her desires had just cost her the most important person in her life. But she just couldn't say that outloud to anyone yet.

"Jane?" his tone softened. "Clearly something happened between you two last night. As much as I normally would do anything for you, I don't think this is my conversation to have with her. And I think you know that. Go talk to her. Whatever it is it won't get better by you avoiding her."

Vince was troubled by their issues. He had never seen such a strong friendship as the one that existed between Jane and Maura. He had always marvelled at how open and accepting Jane was with Maura. She was a very reserved person but if anyone could get passed that it had been Maura. They were good for each other. Jane gave Maura a true sense of friendship and family and Maura gave Jane a sense of trust she never seemed to find in anyone else. He hated to think that friendship could possibly be in jeopardy.

"Please," Jane practically begged.

That almost made Korsak cave. He had never seen Jane like this before. But on the other hand it reinforced his belief that Jane needed to see and speak with Maura.

"I'm sorry Jane. It needs to be you," he answered and he walked off leaving her standing in the hallway. There was part of him that wasn't even sure she was going to go find the doctor to deal with whatever the issue was.

R&I

Rondo got the answer he was looking for. And it cost him exactly what he thought it would. He now owed a debt to someone he never, ever wanted to owe but as he walked away he simply reminded himself again who the favor was for and who it would benefit. Both ladies were worth any debt he would have to take on. Now he needed to find Jane. As he headed out to find her he knew the details he had been able to get were definitely enough for the detective to bring down the man who not only killed those two girls but also his partner. The same man who now was targeting the doctor.

What Rondo knew was most urgent was the information he got that the guy was still intent on going after Maura. The man hadn't expected her to be able to defend herself the way she did in that parking garage. Apparently she was the first woman who had ever fought back successfully against him. But Rondo had learned that he wasn't going to cut his losses and run. In fact, Rondo's source was certain that the guy was planning on trying to attack the doctor again that day.

He needed to get to Jane quickly so she could watch out for Maura. He was going to head to the station to find Jane but instead he reasoned that after the Maura's attack at the mall Jane would most likely be at the doctor's house in Beacon Hill looking out for her. So that's where he was headed. He figured he would catch the detective and tell her all she needed to know to catch the guy plus he could see for himself that the doctor was safe and sound and alright after last night.

As he continued on his way to the Beacon Hill home he knew the information he got was worth the debt he now carried. He had to help his detective and protect her doctor.

R&I

Two hours of analysis and review had finally given Maura what she was looking for in reference to the bleach substance. She had been able to isolate a specific compound within the chemical and that allowed her to find the exact chemical composite match. It did trace to an industrial strength bleaching agent.

She ran a search for businesses that would use such an agent and was surprised to find that only two types of commercial businesses used the bleaching agent. A more thorough review of the chemical components actually allowed Maura to pinpoint one commercial business as a possibility. From that, she found only three Boston based businesses fit the potential profile and had access the the bleaching agent in the quantity that would have been required to submerge a body.

She knew she needed to get this information to Jane but she was sure Jane didn't want to see her. But it was a major clue in a case that was now open for two weeks. So Maura knew she needed to still deliver the results. She printed the reports she needed and added them to the file she had prepared. She gathered up everything and resolved to head out to the station to deliver the necessary information. She was a professional after all. Maybe she would get lucky and find Frost or Korsak first instead of Jane.

With the report ready to be delivered, Maura grabbed her purse and went to get the extra set of car keys. Vince had parked her car out on the street last night and had locked the key inside the car and left them under the driver's seat. Maura had promised Vince she had another set inside her house to it was fine to lock the keys in. She found the other set for the car and headed out her front door.

R&I

The man had waited near the parking garage last night waiting for the doctor's car to leave the area. He figured his best next shot at the doctor was trying to get her at her house. As he figured it, if he followed the doctor home he would find a time when she was alone and he could get her. He still couldn't believe she escaped from him the first time. He hadn't been ready for her to fight back but he was determined to be ready for anything this time.

A few hours later as all the cops were leaving he finally saw the doctor's car moving. But the doctor wasn't driving. Some old guy was. A little disappointed he decided to at least follow the car. Maybe it would still lead him to the doctor. When the car ended up in Beacon Hill, he figured out that the old guy was taking the doctor's car to her home. No cop had the money to live in Beacon Hill. So he would get his wish after all. He would just have to wait for the doctor to come home.

The old man had parked the car and locked it up. Another car arrived shortly after and picked up the old man. So this was where the doctor lived. Now all he had to do was wait for her to return. He parked down the road to watch the house. He was sure she wasn't going to have a late night.

On that front he was wrong. She hadn't come home that night and at about 4 am he fell asleep in his car. He missed the taxi dropping off the doctor. It was daylight out before he wake up with a horrible kink in his neck. He had no idea if she had come home or not but he decided to wait and watch for awhile. At some point she would either have to return home or come out if he had missed her early return.

And then, finally, there was activity. The doctor was coming out of the house and heading to her car. The man put his hand on the door handle and opened it. Now was the perfect chance to end all of this.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

**May 19th**

Maura walked towards her car trying to juggle her purse, her keys, her phone and the file she had printed that she needed to get to Jane. She was about to step off the curb to unlock the car when she heard someone call out. She looked up and was completely surprised by whom she saw coming towards her.

"Doc!" Rondo hollered out when he saw she was about to get to her car. He wanted to talk to her and didn't want to risk her driving away before he could get to her. He quickened his pace but saw that she heard him and was waiting for him to catch up to her.

"Rondo?" Maura asked surprised to see the man anywhere in Beacon Hill.

"Doc," he answered again as he walked closer to her. "I'm sorry. I hope I didn't startle you." He suddenly felt bad for hollering at her especially after what had happened to her yesterday.

"It's ok Rondo. You didn't startle me but what are you doing here?" she asked. She had no idea why Jane's CI was at her house. Not that she minded. Maura really liked Rondo. He was an endless flirt but he never meant anything by it and Maura considered the man a friend.

"I need to speak with Jane," he said and Maura couldn't help but notice the anxious look he seemed to have on his face. He was clearly bothered by something.

The other thing she couldn't help was her reaction to hearing Jane's name. She felt herself grimace just from hearing Rondo ask for her. "She's not here," she told Rondo trying to keep her emotions in check.

Rondo looked around and had to admit he was surprised. "I'm sorry Doc. I just thought after what happened to you last night she would have become your permanent shadow."

Maura raised an eyebrow. "You heard about what happened last night?" she asked. She was sure he was talking about the mall incident and not what was going on with Jane but part of her almost wanted to make sure.

"Yeah Doc. I heard. Are you ok?" he asked with a deep concern for her evident in his tone.

"I'm fine. I didn't get hurt," she reassured him.

"From what I heard, you totally kicked his ass," Rondo said and couldn't help the smile that spread across his face. "Or should I say you kicked his nuts?"

Maura couldn't help the giggle that escaped her. It really wasn't a laughing matter but the look on Rondo's face as he praised her efforts from the night before was just too funny not to react to. It was actually the first time since yesterday she had even smiled and it felt good to laugh.

"I just did what I needed to do to get away from the guy," she said not wanting to make a big deal out of what had happened.

Rondo smiled and looked around again. As much as he wanted to just talk with the doctor he still needed to find Jane to tell her what he had found out about who it was that was trying to hurt the woman in front of him. "Five-O really isn't here?" he asked again getting a little anxious.

"No, I'm sorry Rondo. She's not here." Given what Maura had done that morning she wasn't even sure Jane would ever be anywhere near the Beacon Hill home ever again. "Is there something I can help you with?"

Rondo looked at the doctor but wasn't sure he should tell her what he knew before telling Jane. It was about the doctor but he had a feeling that his detective would be unhappy with him if he told the doctor. It was bound to potentially scare her and he didn't want to upset her. But at the same time it directly involved her and he wondered if he should just tell her that he knew who was trying to hurt her and why.

Finally he answered. "To be honest with you Doc, I need to speak with Jane. I have some information for her that will help her with her case. She really needs to get this information." He wasn't going to risk upsetting Jane because he upset the doctor.

Maura could tell by how he was acting that he did have something important to tell Jane. She almost pressed him for the information but it wasn't her place it get involved in Jane's murder investigation without being asked. She was in enough trouble with the woman as it was.

"I'm about to head to the station," she said to the man indicating to the file in her hand. "Would you like to ride with me? Maybe Jane is there."

A smile crept across Rondo's face. A ride to the station and to Jane would be perfect. "If you don't mind that would be great," he said not hiding his gratitude.

Maura returned his smile and lifted up her keys hitting the power unlock button. "Get in," she said as she started to move towards her side of the car.

R&I

He was out of his car with the 9 millimeter in his hand when he first heard someone shout out at the ME. He froze suddenly concerned that the voice calling out the her was trying to warn her about him. But as he stood and watched he quickly realized that the voice calling out was trying to get the ME's attention not to warn her.

He found it odd that the man now moving quickly towards the ME looked like a bum. He stood out in the Beacon Hill neighbor like a sore thumb. Who could this man possibly be and why was the ME actually speaking with him? The scene in front of the man made no sense to him at all.

He stood staring at the two people who clearly appeared to be talking. Not wanting to alert anyone to his presence he moved towards a tree to conceal himself from the ME and he made sure no one could see the gun that was in his hand.

He couldn't believe his luck. He had been waiting since yesterday to get a chance to take out the ME and just when he thought he was going to get a clear shot on her some bum off the streets was now interrupting his plans. He could be patient. There was no way the conversation between a doctor and a bum could last for too long so he would wait for the man to leave and then he would make his move against her.

When he saw that the doctor's tail lights flash indicating that she had unlocked the car he got nervous. She was going to drive away before he had a chance to take a shot at her. He suddenly felt panicked. He was now completely convinced that this might be the last decent chance to get at the ME before she could finish the analysis of the bleaching agent she had described to the detective.

So he made a choice. It wasn't a perfect situation but it was now his best shot. He had wanted to wait for the bum to leave but that didn't appear to be happening. And he needed to get close enough to the ME to get off a shot before she got into the car. If he was going to do this it needed to be now. Worse case scenario he would shoot the bum too. What did he care?

So he walked as swiftly towards the ME as he could looking to get as close as he could without drawing her attention. As he got within a few steps of where he knew he would be able to get off a shot he pulled out the gun for a second time.

His focus was now on the ME. His target. In those few seconds as he closed the last few feet between where he was and where he needed to be all he could see was her. He took one more step and raised his gun.

R&I

Jane had sat in her car inside the parking garage for ten minutes before finally turning the key. She couldn't believe Korsak wouldn't go speak with Maura for her. He was supposed to be her friend. One of her two partners. She entertained the idea of asking Frost. He was younger and less willing to say no to Jane. But in the end she decided she would go.

Maura needed to know she was in danger. Needed to agree with allowing for the protection detail. At least until Jane could finally catch a break with this damn suspect and get him off the street. She shook her head and added inability to do her damn job to the growing list of things she thought Maura had the right to be mad at her about. If she had just been able to figure out who this guy was he never would have gone after Maura in the first place.

How was she going to face Maura? She sat in the car wondering what she would even say to her. How does someone apologize for something that they had secretly wanted to happen for as long as they could remember? She wasn't sorry she had slept with Maura. She was just sorry she took advantage of Maura to do so.

What Jane had wanted was for Maura to feel the same for her. To love her as much as she did. To want to be together the way Jane wanted to be together. She had wanted to have sex with Maura but only if and when Maura wanted the same. But that's not what happened. What happened was Jane seemed to wait until Maura was traumatized by an attacker and a nightmare and once that happened she simply took advantage.

The guilt she was still feeling turned her stomach. She was beyond upset with herself. If she had just been able to control her desires things between her and Maura would be fine. Instead, she knew Maura was done with her. Would back away from her. It had already started. Maura's leaving in the middle of the night was just the confirmation Jane needed.

Her fears about Maura leaving her if she ever found out were justified. This was why she had never intended to tell Maura anything. This was why she threatened Angela time and time again not to interfere or speak out of turn. Maura had said what would happen. And it all was coming true.

But as she sat in her car feeling sorry for herself another thought occurred to her. She still loved Maura. No matter what she would always love Maura. Even when Maura stopped having anything to do with her. It was that love for Maura that made Jane turn the key in the car and put it into gear. That love for Maura included the need to still make sure the woman was safe. Someone may still be trying to hurt her and Jane needed to ensure Maura would be ok.

That meant a police protection detail. And that meant a conversation with the woman. Jane had already failed her once. She was determined not to fail her a second time. She would do what needed to be done to ensure Maura's safety. She took her foot off the brake and started her drive to Beacon Hill.

R&I

It all happened so fast that it would be highly unlikely that any of the four witnesses to the shooting would be able to tell the exact same story about how it all went down.

Rondo was about to step towards Maura's Prius when he saw the man walking up on her rather quickly. For him, it was the look on the man's face that tipped him off that something was really wrong. Rondo had seen that kind of look far too often in his lifetime. He didn't have time to register anything other than the man's eyes. That told him all he needed to know.

Maura had her back to the man approaching so she didn't react to anything until she looked up and saw Rondo coming at her instead of getting into the car. She had just started to turn her attention to her immediate right when she saw more of a shadow than a person. A shadow that seemed to stop abruptly. For some reason the whole scene was fuzzy for Maura. Except for the gun. That she saw clear as day. She just didn't understand what it was doing in the shadow's possession.

The man came to a stop to take aim at the ME. He realized too late that the bum saw him and appeared to understand what he was trying to do. He underestimated the bum. He thought for sure if the guy saw the gun he would run or try to hide. But this guy did the one thing the man couldn't afford to have him do. This guy charged at the ME. In fact, before the man could react or adjust he had fired the 9 millimeter but he knew in an instant that the bullet intended for the ME was about to hit another target. It was now about to hit the bum.

Jane had just rounded the corner to Maura's block when she heard it before she saw it. The distinct sound of a gun being fired. Then a second one. Her eyes caught up quickly as she took in the scene of a man holding out a gun taking aim at a woman and a man. There was a delay in processing that the woman and the man were Maura and Rondo. But Jane's mind got there faster than most would. Her reaction turned purely instinctual.

She floored the car to close the gap between herself and the man with the gun. Her gun was out of her holster and in her hand in a microsecond and she had it out the window even faster. She squeezed the trigger twice in an effort to hit the man. She got close but ultimately missed. She watched as he took off running back to a vehicle. The man fired aimlessly twice more behind himself in Jane's vicinity but he never even hit her car. Jane veered her car towards his vehicle in an attempt to block him in but he maneuvered around her and sped off.

She had two options. Chase the man. Or check up on the woman she loved and a friend. Even though she was a cop it was a no brainer for Jane. She slammed on the brakes and grabbed the portable radio as she exited the car. Her Glock held steady in her other hand.

"Shots fired! Repeat shots fired! Officer needs assistance," Jane shouted into the radio as she ran over towards Maura and Rondo. She didn't even remember telling dispatch what her location was.

"Maura!" Jane shouted trying to figure out if Maura was alright. Both Maura and Rondo were laying on the ground next to her car. Her eyes ran up and down Maura's body trying to see if she was hurt in any way.

"We need an ambulance!" was the only thing she heard Maura say. Jane let her eyes leave Maura long enough to take in Rondo's form. Maura had rolled him over and and in an instant Jane saw the wound. Maura moved quickly over him trying to apply pressure on the chest wound caused by a 9 millimeter Jane was all too familiar with. "GSW to the upper quadrant."

Jane called in her location, the need for a bus and a description of the vehicle the shooter had driven off in. Once she was sure all the help she could request was being summoned she turned her attention first to the scene out in front of Maura and Rondo. She wanted to make absolutely sure that the shooter had left the scene and wasn't returning to make another attempt. Finally she felt as if the immediate danger had passed and her turned her attention to Maura and her wounded friend.

"What can I do?" she asked in desperation.

"Your jacket. I need to keep pressure on the wound to try to stop the bleeding," she answered.

Jane's jacket was off and handed to Maura without Jane giving it another thought. She watched as Maura folded her jacket a couple of times and then used it to apply pressure over the wound. Jane let her eyes wander to the wound and she had a hard time holding back her emotions as she watched Rondo's blood soak into her jacket.

"Where the hell is the bus?" she mumbled in frustration. There just didn't seem to be anything she, or Maura, could do until the ambulance arrived. She heard sounds of sirens in the distance and while she was comforted that the calvary were approaching she knew the sounds were still too far away.

"Jane, I need your help," Maura said snapping Jane's attention back. "His breathing is starting to get labored." Jane couldn't miss the worried look that was on Maura's face. "My bag," she said and nodded towards her car.

Jane scrambled to Maura's car and found her doctor's bag in the back seat. She grabbed it and brought it over to Maura. Siren noises were getting louder but they were still too far away for either Jane or Maura's comfort.

"I need you to take my place. We need to keep pressure on this wound. The bleeding is slowing down but it hasn't stopped. Switch with me," Maura instructed as calmly as she could.

Jane immediately dropped down to her knees and replaced Maura's hands with her. "How hard should I press?" she asked not wanting to hurt Rondo further.

"As hard as you can manage for right now. I'm worried he is going to bleed out before the ambulance gets here," she half mumbled trying not to let her fears get the best of her. Maura turned her attention to her bag and pulled out a stethoscope. She wanted to listen to Rondo's breath sounds.

Maura approached Rondo and placed the diaphragm of her stethoscope onto his chest and she closed her eyes to help concentrate on what she was hearing. "Diminished breath sounds on left," she again mumbled as she moved the diaphragm to several different places on Rondo's chest. "Tachypnea," she said again. "I'm worried about a hemopneumothorax."

"English Maura. What?" Jane wanted to understand what was happening to her friend.

"His shallow rapid breaths along with the decreased breath sounds are signs that both air and blood could be accumulating in his chest cavity. He needs a chest tube to help relieve the pressure," Maura said trying to explain her concerns to Jane as best she could. "I don't have anything here at all that can help."

Jane was about to say something when finally the ambulance pulled up on scene. Several police cars were right behind the bus. The EMTs were out of the bus quickly and Maura explained what her diagnosis was while stepping out of the way.

"Detective, you need to step aside so we can work," Jane heard one of the EMTs say. She never even registered that the EMT had recognized her. She wouldn't take her hands off her jacket that was still being pressed down on Rondo's chest.

"Detective," the EMT said again trying to get Jane to back off so they could work. Jane wouldn't move.

"Jane, let them work." It was Maura's voice that finally got Jane to release the pressure she had been putting onto the wound and she slowly stood and moved out of the way so the EMTs could work. She stepped back but couldn't take her eyes off Rondo.

R&I

As patrol officers arrived Jane took command of the scene giving out instructions and directions. Several units took in Jane's vehicle description and raced off trying to catch up to the vehicle. She requested helicopter assistance for the scene thinking maybe a view from above would help locate the car. But even as she gave the instructions she knew the man wouldn't be caught.

After she was sure the scene was being secured she turned to walk back towards Maura. Outside of trying to handle Rondo's injury they hadn't really said much to each other. She slowly started to approach the ME when Korsak came running towards them both.

"Jane?" Korsak's voice didn't hide the panic she saw etched on his face. "Jane what the hell happened?" he asked as he slowed down in front of his partner. He turned his attention to the EMTs working on someone laying in front of Maura's car.

"GSW to the chest," Jane answered automatically. "Vince, it's Rondo."

Vince did a double take at the man on the ground. That was the last thing he had expected. "Jesus Jane, what happened here?" he asked again wanting details. "All I heard was your call for assistance."

"It was him," Jane said. "It was our guy. I rounded the corner in my car and he was standing in front of Maura and Rondo and he had just fired his gun. I couldn't get there fast enough to stop him. I shot at him twice but missed. He fired at my car two more times and then he managed to get into his car and drove off. Blue Nissan Altima. Mid to late 2000s model. 4 door. I couldn't get any of the plate but it was a Massachusetts tag." Jane said in an almost ramble.

Korsak was taking notes. Jane had called in most of those details but he noted a few things he could add to the BOLO. "We have units out looking for the car Jane. You are sure it was our guy?"

"It was the same man who attacked me last night," the answer came from Maura who Jane hadn't even realized was listening in. "But I don't have any idea why he was here or how he knew where I lived," she said as she was trying to make sense of everything that had just occurred.

Maura stared back at Vince and Jane hoping to get some sort of answer. She let her eyes drift over to Jane but in an instant Jane dropped her eyes unwilling to make eye contact with Maura. Jane's refusal to look at her broke her heart. Despite everything that was going on Maura had let herself believe that Jane coming over to her house had meant she wanted to talk about what had happened between them. Seeing that Jane wouldn't even look at her now put that hope in doubt.

Vince didn't miss the fact that Jane was now refusing to look at Maura. He was surprised that an event like a shooting hadn't seemed to fix whatever the problem between the two seemed to be. "Doc, are you alright?" he asked concerned about Maura's well being.

When Maura didn't answer right away both Vince and Jane turned their attention to her. "Maura?" Vince asked again.

"I'm fine," Maura said just a little too unconvincingly. Neither Jane nor Vince believed her.

"Where are you hurt?" Jane asked immediately. Her eyes again started to dart up and down the ME's body. Something was wrong.

"My leg," Maura finally admitted. She hadn't even really felt anything until a few minutes ago. She knew it been masked by the adrenaline rush from trying to save Rondo.

In an instant Jane hollered for an EMT and was forcing Maura down on the ground and off her legs. "Where?" she said still trying to find a wound.

"Left calf," was Maura's answer.

Jane carefully but quickly started to pull up on Maura's pant leg. Once she did that she found the wound. A sigh of relief escaped her. It was a flesh wound. She knew it would hurt like hell but it wasn't serious.

"It's alright Maura. It's just a graze. One of the shots he took at you guys must have ricocheted off the pavement," Jane tried to say as reassuring as she could. The EMT arrived and took Jane's place to look at Maura's wound.

Jane walked back over to Korsak. "Is she ok?" he asked.

"Flesh wound. It'll hurt but she'll be alright," Jane answered. "Damn it Vince, that's twice with her now. We have to find this guy!" She couldn't contain the frustration.

"How did he know where I lived?" Maura asked as the EMT was cleaning the wound on her leg.

Korsak and Jane walked back over to she. "Does she know yet?" he asked Jane.

"Know what?" Maura asked.

"No," Jane answered.

"Know what?" Maura asked again.

"Maura, your attacker is our murder suspect," Korsak said. "We think he overheard you at the last crime scene and is now targeting you. Jane was coming here to tell you."

Maura looked at Korsak and then back to Jane. She tried to get Jane to look at her but Jane seemed to find the ground around her feet much more interesting to look at in that moment. She was about to say something when Frost came running up to them.

"Are you guys ok?" he asked as he looked around at the scene. He didn't like the fact that Maura was being attended to by an EMT.

"It's just a flesh wound," Maura answered back to Frost when she saw the concern on his face.

"And Rondo?" he asked and flinched when he saw both Maura and Jane's reaction. He knew it was serious. He followed their eyes to the EMTs still trying to prepare Rondo for transport. After a few moments he turned to Jane. "Jane, units are looking for the car but they don't seem to be having any luck."

Jane nodded and spoke but only looked at Frost. "We need to get out the sketch and the vehicle information."

"I've already added the vehicle information to the press release information. It will get out within the hour," Frost said.

The EMT finished applying a bandage to Maura's leg. "I still think you should be seen by a doctor," the EMT said to Maura.

"I am a doctor," Maura answered back. "Thank you," she said as a means to dismiss the man. She was helped up and all four stood and watched the EMTs finish up with Rondo trying to stabilize him to transport him to the hospital.

"Why was he here?" Frost asked to no one in particular just a little curious as to why Rondo was all the way out in Beacon Hill.

All eyes turned to Maura who seemed to be the only one who possessed the answer. "He was looking for you," she said to Jane. Their eyes met for a brief moment but again Jane wouldn't hold the contact.

"Did he say what he needed?" she asked as she kept her eyes on Rondo instead of Maura.

Maura shook her head. "Only that he had some information for you that he thought was extremely important but he hadn't told me what that was. I was going to give him a ride to the station when..." and her voice trailed off as she looked back over at the ambulance. The EMTs were getting ready to load him into the bus.

"Go with him," Jane said barely loud enough for anyone but Maura to hear. She turned to look at Jane and saw the look on Jane's face.

She nodded and agreed. She had planned on going with if they allowed it anyway. She needed to be sure Rondo was safe. The man had just saved her life. "Are you coming?" she asked.

Jane shook her head. "I discharged my gun. I need to stay here until I'm cleared." The guys couldn't help but notice that Jane and Maura weren't looking at each other as they spoke. Clearly they hadn't addressed their issues yet.

Maura started to head towards the ambulance. After a brief discussion she was going to be allowed to ride in with the ambulance. Just before she got into the ambulance she heard Jane's voice behind her and she turned.

"Maura, we are putting a police detail on you until this guy is caught. An officer will met you at the hospital." It wasn't a request. It was a statement. And before Maura could even reply Jane had walked away to speak further with Korsak and Frost.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen

**May 20th**

Maura stayed behind in the atrium for a few minutes after watching Jane walk away. She needed a few minutes alone to process everything that had just occurred. She couldn't believe the things Jane had told her. To say that she was surprised that Jane had feelings for her for as long as she had would be an understatement. But she was shocked to learn Jane had been attracted to her for as long as she had been to Jane. How had she not seen it before?

And Jane never told her. She didn't really have the right to question why Jane hadn't said anything. She knew she was just as guilty of hiding her true feelings as Jane seemed to be. But at least she had been allowed to wonder if Jane had felt something too. As she thought again of how Jane had been convinced that Maura would never feel that way, it again tugged at her heartstrings. How Jane had managed to live with that belief for a year was beyond Maura.

She shook her head and let herself think about all the time the two of them had wasted. They could have admitted their feelings for each other sooner and been together so long ago. But fear and a lack of communication seemed to have done an excellent job of keeping them apart. Until now.

Now, she was sure Jane loved her. And she believed Jane knew she loved her. Finally, they could be together. Maura knew she owed Jane an explanation for what happened yesterday but from everything they had already said to each other and from the intensity of the last kiss Jane had given her, Maura was suddenly confident that Jane would listen to her and forgive her for making what could have been the biggest mistake in her life.

After a few minutes, Maura made her way back towards Rondo's room. She knew she was going to encounter Angela and the woman would have questions. So she mentally prepared herself and went to go face the music. As she approached the hospital room she noticed her protection detail was no longer Frankie. As grateful as she was for the detail she was happy that Frankie had been replaced. She hadn't wanted to answer his questions too. Angela's was going to be enough.

She took a deep breath and slowly pushed open the door to Rondo's room. As expected, Angela was occupying the chair that was right next to Rondo's bed. She looked up to see Maura return and she went to get up.

"No, stay there," Maura said. She didn't need Angela to get up. She took the other chair in the room and moved it over towards Rondo's bed and sat down fully expecting an interrogation to commence. She wasn't disappointed.

"Where's Jane?" Angela started. Angela, for her part, noticed immediately the change in demeanor of Maura. She wasn't sure of what had occurred between the two ladies but whatever happened Maura looked as if the weight of the world had been lifted from her shoulders.

"Sergeant Korsak called. She needed to leave," Maura answered.

"So?" Angela said looking at Maura.

"So..." Maura said and left Angela hanging.

"Enough of that young lady. Did you and my daughter finally stop being idiots?" Angela asked with a challenging tone. Given Maura's mood change Angela felt perfectly within her rights to ask and pry a little.

Maura looked at Angela for a minute before answering. A part of her was surprised that Angela seemed to be ok with the idea of her and Jane being together. At that thought she needed to ask. "So, you would approve of Jane and I?"

"Approve? Honey, I've been waiting for years for the two of you to figure out how you feel about each other. Or, actually, I've been waiting for years for the two of you to _act_ on how you feel about each other. You've both known for so long but just seemed to refuse to do anything about it." She looked at Maura and realized Maura hadn't answered her yet. "You are finally doing something about it, right?"

Maura couldn't help the giggle that escaped her. "I shouldn't be surprised you saw what we couldn't," she said.

"Yes I saw it. I swear a blind man could see it. How you two missed it for this long is beyond me. And stop avoiding my question. Did you and Jane make up or not?" Angela was having a hard time containing herself as she desperately wanted to know what the two had talked about.

Maura knew she needed to put Angela out of her misery. "We still have things to talk about but we both now know how the other one feels. And that's a start." She felt that was a nice, diplomatic answer.

Angela smiled. That definitely was progress. "I know this isn't really my business and I won't make you answer me but Maura, how do you feel about Jane?" She knew how Jane felt and she thought she knew about Maura but now she wanted to know for sure.

Without hesitation Maura looked at Angela and answered. "I love her. More than I ever thought was possible."

That, for the moment, was enough for Angela. She smiled and tried not to let the tears forming in her eyes fall.

R&I

Jane entered the bullpen and headed straight to her desk. She felt the two sets of eyes on her but she didn't stop to acknowledge her partners until she took her seat. They had been watching every movement of hers since she stepped off the elevator and there was no mistaking the difference from just a few hours ago.

Both men looked at each other and silently communicated one thought. She had talked to Maura. Clearly things were much better. Both men smiled. The Jane in front of them was the Jane they wanted to see.

"So, what do you have?" she asked Frost. Korsak had only said that Frost found something and she needed to come to the station.

Not hiding the smile on his face indicating that he caught Jane's mood change Frost started to fill her in on what he had managed to figure out. "I finally had a chance to review the research Dr. Isles," he said and watched Jane's reaction to the mention of Maura's name. Not seeing a flinch she would have given just a few hours prior, he continued, "had produced about that industrial strength bleach. According to her research, the bleach our suspect is using is of industrial strength not domestic.

"As I went through her report, she isolated a specific chemical component and from that even was good enough to narrow down our list to three possible businesses within the Boston area that use the bleaching agent. I was able to get the employment records for those three businesses and guess who I found on the payroll for one of them?"

Jane looked at Frost and waited for the answer. Her mood was definitely improved but she wasn't going to play a guessing game with him. Frost quickly picked up on that and decided to fill in the blank. "Alex Jarvis," he said.

That caught Jane's attention. "Our third victim?"

"Yep," Frost confirmed.

"Our third victim worked at a business that uses a bleaching agent that Maura has identified as the same agent used to wipe down all of our victims in this case? Well, that can't be a coincidence. What do we know about Jarvis?"

"It's not so much what we know about Jarvis as it is now who else we were able to identify," he said with a smile.

Jane picked up on the hint. "You found our guy?"

Frost hit a few buttons and pulled up information on the screen in the BRIC. "We found our guy," he confirmed as the sketch that Sara had created was displayed next to a DMV photo of their wanted suspect. "John David Atwood."

"Jane, he has a 9 millimeter registered," Korsak added.

Korsak, Frost and Jane all stared at the screen and there was no mistaking the match. Maura had done an excellent job of describing Atwood to Sara. The sketch was dead on. "Warrants?" Jane asked.

"One for his home and one for his car should be faxed over in the next five minutes," Korsak confirmed. "Cavanaugh has approved our use of SWAT for the warrant execution."

"Do you really think this guy is home?" Jane asked. The last encounter they had with Atwood was at a motel. She was pretty sure he had given up thinking he could simply hide out at his house.

"I don't think he will be there but considering our encounters with him I want SWAT to sweep through that house before we do a search of the property. Frost and I are hoping a search will help get an idea of where he might be hiding out."

"I had the warrant include all electronics found inside the house. I'm hoping we can piece something together from a PC or laptop," Frost added.

Jane nodded and had to admit it wasn't a bad idea to have SWAT sweep the house. Atwood had proven to be very dangerous. "Fair enough. Let's get those warrants and go search his home. I'm sure he won't be there but let's hope we can get a clue as to where he may be."

Jane stared at the photo of her suspect. After two weeks she finally had a name. She was getting closer and closer and she knew it was now just a matter of time before she was going to catch him.

R&I

Maura had been surprised by the lack of questions Angela had for her about what was going on with Jane. But at the same time she loved Angela for the lack of questions. As over the top as the matriarch could be at times, she seemed to understand the exact boundaries she needed to adhere to when it came to Jane and Maura's relationship. At some point, Maura was sure she would share all the details about her and Jane with the woman she had come to view as a second mother but not now. Not yet.

It was all too new. Too undefined. She didn't want to search for answers to questions she may not have yet without Jane to be there that process. There was some unknowns and uncertainties that she knew would need to be explored but she wanted to explore them with Jane. She was certain she loved Jane. Certain Jane loved her. After Friday night she was absolutely certain that they were physically compatible. But what was going to happen next was still undefined between the two and Maura didn't want to theorize about that with Angela.

A murmur from Rondo was what pulled Maura out of her own head. She immediately was at his bed. She heard the noise again and she reached over hitting the call button to alert the nurse's station that Rondo was starting to wake up.

"Yes?" came a voice.

"Mr. Washington is starting to wake up," Maura said out loud.

"We'll be right there," the voice answered.

"Rondo?" Maura said gently trying to pull his eyes open.

His eyes started to flutter and twitch as he was slowly coming around. After a few seconds he managed to get his eyes open and keep them open. His eyes looked into Maura's begging for an explanation.

"Rondo, it's alright. You are in the hospital but you are going to just fine," she said to him.

"Hospital?" he asked confused his voice dry and scratchy.

"Yes, you've been here since yesterday. Do you remember what happened?" she asked.

Rondo was quiet for a minute and then spoke. "Shot?" was all he said.

Maura nodded, "Yes, you were shot in the chest. You've been through surgery. They removed the bullet and repaired the damage to your chest and lung. You're going to have a little bit of a recovery but you are going to be ok."

Rondo closed his eyes and rested for a minute. He was really tired but he wanted to understand everything that was going on. "Doc?" he asked without opening his eyes back open.

"Yes," she answered.

"Are you ok?" he asked slowly. He remembered that the guy was trying to shoot her and he needed to know that she was ok.

Maura blinked back tears suddenly touched by his concern. She already owed him her life and she couldn't believe that he was worried about her when he was the one laying in a hospital bed. "I'm just fine Rondo. Jane chased off the guy right after he shot you." Her minor leg wound was just fine and she didn't even need to tell him she got that.

Hearing that Rondo open his eyes again. "Vanilla," he said with a smile and just a hint of pride. After a moment the expression on his face changed. "I need to talk to Jane," he said rather insistently getting a little agitated.

"Ssshh," Maura tried to calm him down. The last thing he needed was to get himself upset. "Rondo, you need to stay calm. It's not good for you to get upset."

"Doc, I need to speak to Jane. I know. I know who this guy is," he said looking directly into her eyes.

Seeing the look on his face Maura knew he had information for Jane. It was in fact why he had been out to her house in the first place. "Alright, alright. Relax. We'll see if we can get her." Maura turned to Angela. "Will you call Jane?" she asked.

Angela was standing up and reaching for her phone in an instant. She stepped out of the room and dialed her daughter's cell phone and waited for an answer.

R&I

Korsak and Jane had been right about Atwood not being at home. But they let SWAT do a sweep of the entire house before they entered to start their search. They were looking for anything that would give them an idea of where Atwood was. Jane was about to start a search of Atwood's bedroom when her phone rang.

She looked down at the ID and saw it was her mother. Normally she would let it go to voicemail considering she was working but she knew Angela was still at the hospital with Maura and Rondo and she wanted to make sure everything was alright.

"Hey Ma," Jane started.

"Jane, Rondo's awake," Angela started out.

"That's great. Has the doctor been in to see him yet?" she asked.

"Maura just paged the nurses. Jane, he's asking for you. In fact, he's insisting that he needs to see you. He told Maura he knows who you are looking for."

Jane was quiet for a minute. Rondo had information. She remembered Maura said he had come out to Beacon Hill looking for her. If he was now asking for her she knew it must be important. "Alright Ma. Is Maura still there?"

"Yeah, she's trying to keep him calm. She asked me to call you."

"Tell her I'm heading back there. I'm about twenty minutes away. Let Rondo know I'm coming," she said. She hoped that would help keep the man calm.

"I will," Angela answered and disconnected the call.

Jane hung up and walked down into the living room to talk to Korsak. "Vince, are you and Frost good with handling the rest of this search?" she asked.

"Sure. What's up?" he asked.

"Rondo is awake and asking for me. He has information about our suspect," she answered.

Vince smiled at hearing that Rondo was coming around. "Go," was all he said.

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"Go. We will finish this. Maybe Rondo will have something we can use."

"He usually does," Jane said. "I'll keep you posted." She headed out to her car and went to make the trip back to the hospital.

R&I

Jane got off the elevator and headed down towards Rondo's room. She was surprised to see both Maura and Angela standing outside of his room talking. "Maura?" she said as she got closer to the door.

"He's fine Jane," she said wanting to put her at ease right away. "The doctor is just checking him out."

Jane nodded her understanding. "Did he tell you anything?" she asked.

Maura shook her head, "Only that he knew who the guy was."

"So do we," Jane said looking at both of them.

"You found him?" Maura asked.

"Not yet, but we know who he is. I was at his house when you called. He wasn't home but we are hoping to find something as we search through his things."

"How did you find him?" Maura asked.

"You," she said with a smile. "Your bleach report gave us a good place to start. The businesses you could match to the bleach gave us employment records. Our third victim worked at one of the places. So does our suspect. We matched his DMV photo with the sketch Sara did," Jane answered.

The doctor exited the room as Jane was finishing her sentence. All three women turned their attention to him. "How is he?" Maura asked.

"His vitals are good and so are his blood gases. It's going to take time for his wounds to heal but I don't anticipate any complications," he said. Maura stepped aside with him to ask a few more technical questions and Jane took that opportunity to head into Rondo's room.

She was pleased to see him sitting upright. He looked better than the last time she saw him. She no longer wanted to think about how he looked the last time she saw him. She was about to say something but he beat her to the punch.

"Vanilla," he said in his low, flirty voice. Even tired and medicated the man could make Jane blush if he really wanted to.

Hearing his greeting immediately made Jane smile. "Does anything stop you from flirting?" she asked not trying to hide her amusement.

"What can I say? It's entirely your fault for being so damn fine," he said with a smile.

"You are incorrigible," she said and moved to take the seat in the chair by his bed. She took his hand into hers and looked right into his eyes as she spoke. "Don't you ever do that to me again." She had to struggle to keep her voice from cracking.

Rondo merely nodded not wanting to acknowledge just how close to having things turn out differently he had come. He let a minute of silence pass between the two of them before speaking again. "I was looking for you," he said.

"Well, you have me now," she said with a smile.

"I've got information you need Five-O," he said.

"So I have been told. I'm all ears. What do you know?" she asked leaning in so she could concentrate on what the man had to tell her.

Rondo, mostly as a habit, looked around the room to make sure it was just Jane and him. He then looked at his detective and told her what he had found out.

Jane sat and listened to everything Rondo had to say without much comment. Finally when he was done talking she looked at him. "And you trust your source?" she asked.

"In life, no. For this information, yes." It was an honest answer. Rondo was absolutely certain this information was accurate and credible.

It was all Jane needed to hear. She looked at the man in the bed and a flood of emotions hit her. What he had risked for Maura, she just hadn't expected that. "Rondo," she started quietly trying to make sure she had his entire attention. "I can't ever repay you for this." She wasn't just talking about the information. Although that was a big piece of it. Jane knew exactly what Rondo must have had to give up to get what he got. But he had done so. She also meant what Rondo had done for Maura at her house. He took a bullet for the woman that she loved and she knew she would never be able to repay him for that.

Rondo understood exactly what Jane was talking about. "Vanilla, you don't owe me anything. There's no way I would ever let anything happen to that lady. And not just because she's yours." He smiled at Jane. The doctor was his friend. But it was more than that. It was Jane and there wasn't anything he wouldn't do for Jane. So trying to protect the woman she loved was a no-brainer as far as he was concerned.

She smiled at what he was implying. She was suddenly beginning to wonder if Maura and her were the only two people not aware for their feelings for each other before today. "Still, I owe you."

He looked Jane in the eyes and as serious as she had ever seen him get. "It's not a debt I'll ever collect," was all he said.

They sat in silence for a few moments before Jane spoke again. "I need to go," she said apologetically.

"I know. Take care of this," he said.

"I will. Do you need anything?" she asked.

Rondo shook his head. "No, I'm going to be just fine. You just go protect that doctor of ours," he said with a smile.

R&I

Maura looked up when she heard Rondo's door push open. She watched Jane walk out of Rondo's room and stop in front of Angela. The two exchanged a few words and then Jane slowly approached her. Maura could tell Jane had a lot on her mind. "Everything ok?" she asked as Jane approached.

Jane stopped just in front of Maura pausing for a minute and then suddenly pulled Maura into an embrace. They shared the hug in silence for a moment before Maura pulled back wanting to check on Jane who hadn't said anything since walking up to her.

"Jane?" she asked.

"I just kind of realized I was allowed to do this now," she said and couldn't keep the smile from crossing her face.

Maura put herself back into Jane's arms and let herself rest there. "Yes, you are," Maura confirmed. "But, is everything ok?" she asked again.

Jane pulled back once more to talk with Maura. "He knew a lot. It all makes sense now. I need to talk to the guys and Cavanaugh but I think we can close out this case tomorrow."

Maura was surprised. "Really?" she asked.

"Really. We know who. I now understand why. I just need to arrange a few details and we should be able to make our move. This is almost over," Jane said trying to reassure Maura. "I need to leave again and once Rondo falls back asleep I want you to go home. You haven't had much sleep in the last few days and you need some rest. Ma said she'd stay with Rondo tonight. The protection detail will stay with you but I want you to go home and get some sleep."

Maura was quiet for a minute. She couldn't really argue with Jane. She was tired and she hadn't slept much in the last 36 hours. "What about you?" she asked.

Jane smiled. "I need to handle a few things and I'm not sure how late I'm going to be." She was aware of what Maura was asking but she didn't want to make Maura feel like she had to wait up for Jane. She really did want Maura to get some sleep.

Maura looked at Jane and smiled. "Please?" was all she said.

There was no way Jane could say no to the woman. "On one condition," she started. "You have to actually go home and try to get some rest. I'll come over as soon as things are arranged but you have to promise you will eat something and rest."

"I think I can manage that. Angela will stay with Rondo?" she still didn't want to leave him alone. He was awake and out of danger but she wasn't going to leave him alone at the hospital. Not after he had risked his own life to save hers.

"She promised she would. She wants you to get some rest too," Jane answered.

"Alright. I'll make sure he is settled for the night and then I will go home. Will you text me when you are coming over?"

Jane leaned in and placed a chaste kiss on Maura's lips. "I will. I promise." With that Jane took off yet again.

R&I

Jane finished telling her information to Cavanaugh. Korsak and Frost had joined Jane in the BRIC where the conversation was now taking place. They all sat and watched Cavanaugh's reaction to what she had told him and what he was looking at. They waited for Cavanaugh to speak.

"And you confirmed this with our guys?" he asked.

Jane nodded. "I ran it by Callahan after speaking to Rondo. It checks out, Sir."

Frost handled Cavanaugh the last of the files for information Jane had asked him to track down. They gave Cavanaugh a minute to review everything and he again looked up to ask. "What are you all thinking?" he asked.

"We think a joint operation with one swift action. Take it all down. We get our murder suspect and they make a huge collar," Vince said to Sean.

Cavanaugh was quiet again. He looked through the information one last time. He, too, agreed with Jane. Knowing the rest of this information did make it all start to make better sense. "Alright. Jane if you are sure about this, let's get Callahan in here and let's set this up."

"I'm sure," Jane stated with absolute confidence.

Cavanaugh looked at Korsak and Frost and neither one of them looked like they had a doubt in the world. "Get Callahan and call over to the DA's office. Let's get all the warrants lined up and ready. I'll handle coordinating with SWAT. We can make a move on this as early as tomorrow."

That's exactly what Jane had thought could happen. It would take about two more hours to arrange for all the details but she knew that the end of this case was coming fast. She went to one of the phones and started making calls.

R&I

_Are you resting? J_

_I'm relaxing on the couch. That qualifies as resting. M_

_Did you eat? J_

_Yes I did. M_

_Still up for company? J_

_Yes! M_

_I should be there in about 30 minutes. J_

_:D M_

R&I

Jane pulled up alongside the police vehicle that was parked outside Maura's house. She rolled down her window and chatted with the officer briefly. He had nothing to report which all things considered was a good thing. He promised he would keep a sharp eye out for anything out of the ordinary. The officer was a smart man. There was no way the ME was getting hurt on his watch. The detective in front of him would kill him. And then her brother would take a shot at him too. Jane wished the officer a good night and pulled her car into the driveway of the Beacon Hill home.

Jane put her car in park and stared at the house. Given how the day had started this was the last place she thought she would end her day. She thought about the events over the previous two days and she couldn't remember ever having a two day stretch with as many emotional ups and downs as these last two days.

But as she thought about it, she let one thought stay with her. Maura. No matter what the path was that ultimately lead her here, she was here. At Maura's. About to walk into the house of the woman she loved who said she loved her too. Something Jane never imagined would be true. She didn't even fight the smile that swept across her face.

Realizing she was wasting time, she got out of the car and headed for the house. She was now wondering if she should knock or just let herself in. Given everything that was going on she wasn't sure what the appropriate protocol was. Normally she would just walk in but now, with things clearly changing between the two, she wasn't so sure about what to do. As it turned out, she didn't need to answer that.

As soon as she stepped one foot on the front porch Maura had the door open and was pulling Jane into the house. The swiftness of Maura's actions surprised Jane. And Jane's surprise continued as she found herself pushed up against the now closed door with Maura taking absolute possession of Jane's lips.

It was a kiss that rocked Jane to her core. She felt all the air in her lungs start to escape her body but for the first time she could recall she couldn't care less. Who needed air when she had Maura instead? There was no way she was going to break away from the woman who was now fully pressed against her.

Somehow though, the kiss did come to an end. It left both women panting. Maura was the first to speak as they tried to catch their breaths.

"Hi," she said.

"Hi," Jane answered back.

If either had an issue with being pressed against each other while pushed up against the front door, neither expressed it. Or tried to shift positions. They stood there staring at each other for a few more minutes before Maura broke the silence again.

"Did you get everything taken care of?" she asked.

As she asked Jane couldn't help but notice Maura's hands started to work their way towards the buttons on her shirt. She stared in wonder as Maura started to slowly undo each button on Jane's shirt. She didn't think she could form an answer to Maura's question so she simply nodded her head.

Maura smiled at Jane's apparent inability to answer. "Do you need to go anywhere else tonight?" she asked.

By this time the buttons on Jane's shirt had all been undone and Maura was working it slowly off her shoulders and off her arms. Still not trusting her ability to speak Jane simply nodded her head.

That caused Maura to pause. She was hoping Jane didn't have anywhere else she needed to go. "You really have somewhere else you need to go tonight?" she asked. She had managed to remove Jane's shirt leaving in on the floor and was now slowly starting to work in the her belt.

Jane was absolutely overwhelmed by the image in front of her. Maura's slow attempt at undressing her had to be the sexiest thing she had ever seen. To answer the woman in front of her she simply nodded again.

Maura had unhooked the buckle of Jane's belt and had started to work on the buttons of her pants when she half whined. "Where?" she asked.

Jane finally decided it was time to take control. In a swift move she had Maura up in her arms before the doctor could register what was going on. On pure instinct Maura wrapped her legs around Jane's hips and threw her arms around Jane's neck to help anchor herself into Jane's body. Jane headed straight for the stairs and started up them with Maura in her arms.

"Bed," was the only answer Jane gave as she deftly demonstrated her ability to multitask as she kissed the doctor all while carrying her up the stairs and into the master bedroom.


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Clarification. This story was not written in chronological order. For those of you who I may have lost along the way, there is nothing missing from the story. It's just in a jumbled order. If you want to read this story chronologically the correct order is:**

**May 5th- Chapter 2, 3, 5**

**May 6th- Chapter 5**

**May 12th- Chapter 6, 7**

**May 17th- Chapter 9**

**May 18th- Chapter 9, 10**

**May 19th- Chapter 11, 13, 14**

**May 20th- Chapter 1, 4, 8, 12, 15**

**May 21st- Chapter 16, 17**

Chapter Sixteen

**May 21**

Jane slowly started to wake up taking in a deep breath. She was never a morning person. In fact, it was an instinct for her to fight the mornings and try to hang on to slumber as long as possible. But over the years she found that once she started to wake up she rarely could stop the process. And that turned out to be the case that morning. She didn't want to be waking up but the morning was winning out in the battle.

Deciding it wasn't even worth the fight, she slowly rolled over in an attempt to stretch and was temporarily obstructed mid roll. It took her a minute to figure out what was in her way. When she did she couldn't help but smile. It wasn't a what. It was a who. She opened her eyes and found them immediately greeted with a sight that took her breath away.

The hazel eyed medical examiner was laying next to her resting her head in her hand that was propped up by her elbow. She was watching over her with a smile that brightened up the entire room. Before Jane could say anything Maura greeted her with a tender but passionate kiss. It was a hell of a way to wake up in the morning.

"Morning," Maura said as the kiss finally came to an end.

"You have an excellent way of waking a girl up in the morning," Jane said with a smile. It was clear Maura had been awake for longer than Jane. Jane was actually pretty sure Maura had been watching her sleep. "How long have you been awake?"

"Not long," Maura admitted. She hesitated but then finished her answer. "But long enough to watch you sleep. You are gorgeous when you are that at peace."

Jane blushed a little. She wasn't used to hearing such things said to her. "Wow," she exclaimed in mock jest. "You're a creeper," she said with a smirk. "Who knew?"

"I am not," Maura answered back defensively. "I just didn't want you to wake up alone this time." She said it before she really thought about it. She knew they still needed to talk about what happened the last time they had spent the night together.

Maura had thought for awhile that they would have that conversation last night when Jane came over but she found herself wanting the detective more and more as she thought about her. The longer she had waited for Jane's text that she was coming over the more she knew she didn't want conversation to be on the evening's agenda. Clearly, Jane's response to Maura's doorway greeting last night signaled that the detective was fine with tabling deep conversation to a later time. Maura wondered if now was that later time.

Jane sighed and turned herself completely into Maura. She absentmindedly started to rub her fingers up and down Maura's arm. "About that," she said. She, too, knew they would have to discuss what had happened. "I know we need to still talk. About that and about us and what this all means," Jane started. They had slept together twice now but Jane still wanted to understand where things were heading between them.

"But," Maura added for Jane with a small smile. Just from Jane's tone Maura understood that now wasn't going to be that time to talk.

"But," Jane repeated back. "I need to get to the station. We are making our move first thing this morning. I'm sorry," she added with sincerity. She really did want to talk about everything with Maura. She wanted to start fresh with what she hoped was a relationship with the woman she loved. But, she was needed at the station early and she didn't want to start something she couldn't finish. "I just don't want to start a serious conversation I may not be able to finish this morning."

Maura leaned down and gently kissed Jane. "You don't have to apologize for having to work. I understand." She kissed Jane again and this time they both let the kiss deepen. Maura marvelled at just how soft Jane's lips felt against her own. Her skin was just as soft but there was something about Jane's lips being pressed against any part of her body that just seemed to send shivers all throughout her.

Jane let her arm move under Maura and in a quick and slightly unexpected move she reversed her and Maura's positions so she was now hovering over the ME. She had even managed to shift their position without breaking their kiss. Given their two previous nights together, Jane had found she much preferred being on top and being in control. The feel of Maura beneath her was a sensation she knew she would never tire of or take for granted.

The kiss continued to escalate and soon hands started to explore. Jane had discovered that Maura seemed overly sensitive to hands that brushed along her side over her ribs. A trait she found she couldn't resist testing again this morning.

Feeling Jane's hand brush along her side she softly moaned and then giggle. "I thought you had to work," she whispered realizing that both their levels of arousal were increasing at an advanced rate. They were in danger of getting lost in the moment.

"I do," Jane acknowledged in between kisses as she worked her lips down Maura's jawline and gently across her neck. The taste of Maura was like an addiction for Jane. "But I'm pretty sure I have time to squeeze this in." Her lips softly caressed Maura's skin as she continued working her way down Maura's body.

Maura released a soft moan and found she was helpless to stop the detective's plan. But then again, she suddenly thought, why would she ever want to?

R&I

The bullpen was abuzz with activity. Detectives were moving in and out of offices and in between groups giving last minute directions or going over the final preparations for the raid. Tact teams, a team from Narc and Vice detectives seemed to have invaded what should have been homicide's territory. But for a case like this Jane understood that for today it was everyone's sandbox to play in.

She didn't care who took the credit for the collars. She would let Cavanaugh fight it out with Callahan and the other brass. All she wanted was one man. John David Atwood was hers. He had killed three people, attacked her girlfriend twice and shot her dear friend. Everything else that was going to happen that day was for others to worry about. Jane had her target. Her focus. The rest was just background noise.

"Are you ready?" Frost asked as they had both stood leaning against their desks watching all the people moving about.

"Yep," she answered confidently. "You?" she asked.

"Absolutely," he answered just as confident.

They, along with Korsak, were tasked with leading the raid on the location where Atwood was supposed to be hiding out. Half the bodies running around the bullpen were going to follow them. The other half, including Cavanaugh who just couldn't avoid some of the fun, was going after what turned out to be part of the motive behind the deaths of Franklin, Scott and Jarvis.

That team was making a raid on Jake's.

Rondo had been given information that there was a sex trafficking operation being run out of Jake's. According to Rondo's source, the men controlling the trafficking operation were Irish mob using Jake's as a front for the dealings and as a cover to help explain the influx of girls in and out of the club. Franklin and Scott had gotten mixed up with some of the men working the operation and had gotten in way over their heads.

They had been sold to Atwood and Jarvis. Atwood had been just a bit too rough with Franklin during sex and had ended up killing her. Jarvis had been easier on Scott but when Franklin didn't return to the warehouse space she shared with Scott, Melissa started asking questions. Atwood then treated Scott to the same fate as Franklin raping and killing her.

Members of the Family were apparently starting to get nervous about whether the murders would link back to their trafficking operation. Everyone got especially nervous when Frost returned to Jake's a second time asking to watch more video. The Family was afraid Frost would see evidence of the trafficking activities and alert Vice or Organized Crime. They pushed Freddy 'Slim' Sullivan, their front man, to try to make things go away.

Slim threatened Jarvis thinking it was Jarvis who had killed the two girls. After Jarvis declared his innocence he confronted Atwood about the murders. During that confrontation Atwood killed Jarvis. Atwood assumed everything had been taken care of until he found out Maura might be able to test for the bleach he had used to try to destroy any forensic evidence on the three bodies. The problem the bleach presented was that it came from the business where Atwood and Jarvis worked together.

That was bad news for all parties involved since the bleach traced back to a biohazard cleaning service owned by Slim, who was also Atwood's uncle. From what Rondo was told, Slim was helping Atwood hide out from the police because he felt guilty for giving Jane and Frost the video of Franklin and Scott inside Jake's. He didn't know at the time they were tied to the sex trafficking operation and he hadn't watched the video before burning it for Frost. He didn't realize he had given up his nephew and quite possibly the trafficking operation until after Scott was murdered.

Jane had checked with Vice after talking with Rondo and they confirmed that they were investigating a possible sex trafficking operation with possible mob ties. However, they didn't have any evidence as to where exactly the girls were being traded or who exactly was running the operation. With Jane's help, being able to connect Atwood and Jarvis to Slim was all Vice would need to be able to raid Jake's and bust the sex trafficking operation and possibly even establish RICO charges for the mob family.

Jane's team was heading to Atwood's alleged hideout. Slim had made arrangements for Atwood to hide out in a safehouse in South Boston until he could get him out of the city. Rondo told Jane that Atwood's exit from Boston was set for Monday so their window to move on their murder suspect was closing fast.

Cavanaugh and Callahan had presented all the information they had to the DA who got a judge to sign off on all the necessary warrants. It was to be a joint Homicide and Vice operation to take down Slim Sullivan and the sex trafficking operation being run out of Jake's and an arrest warrant execution for John David Atwood for three counts of murder and two counts of attempted murder. The planning was done. The tasks were assigned. It was time to make their move.

"Alright you all know what to do. You know your targets. Everyone stick to the plan and everyone be careful. We all go home tonight," came Callahan's voice as he was about to signal it was time to head out.

He was answered with a chorus of "Yes Sir!"

R&I

Maura gave up on waiting around the house for word from Jane on how the raids went. The minute she realized she was starting to pace she knew simply being alone in the house was a bad idea. So she grabbed her phone and her car keys and headed out. She knew of a better place to spend her waiting time.

"Doc," Rondo called out as Maura entered. The smile on his face when he saw her lit up the room.

"Good morning Rondo," Maura said with a warm smile as she made her way over to his bedside. She couldn't help but look at all the readouts from the machines still attached to the man. As she took all the information in she was very pleased with what she saw. "How are you feeling?" She saw what the machines told her but now she wanted to know from the man himself.

"I'm doing good Doc," he said and seemed to mean it. He watched her eyes scan over all the medical equipment as if she was double checking his answer. He waited for her eyes to resettle onto his before he answered again. "Really, I'm ok."

Maura smiled and looked around the room. "Where's Angela?" she asked. She hadn't really expected Angela to still be at the hospital at this hour but she had hoped that Rondo hadn't been alone for too long.

"Mrs. Vanilla just stepped out to get some coffee," he said. "And maybe a doughnut for me."

Maura grinned at Rondo's nickname for Angela. "You aren't allowed any doughnuts yet," she scolded softly but honestly took his desire for one as a good sign for his recovery. Maura finished walking around his bed and took a seat in the chair next to him.

"Vanilla making a move today?" he asked. He could tell she was anxious.

Maura simply nodded. She didn't want to dwell on it and she really didn't want Rondo worrying about anything but his own recovery.

"Doc, our girl is tough. And smart. She'll be ok," he said looking Maura straight in the eyes.

Maura cleared her throat before answering. "I know. But I'll always worry," she answered truthfully. She trusted Jane and believed that Jane never took unnecessary risks with her life or the lives of those around her. But she would always worry until Jane was home each and every night.

"That's because you love her," he said. "It's your job to worry about her."

It was just a simple statement. But incredibly true. She smiled at the man in the bed. "How did you know?" she asked.

"Doc," he said looking at her like she was crazy for even asking. "I hate to break it to you but you and Vanilla were the only two people in this town who seemed not to realize that you both were in love."

"So people keep saying," she said but with a smile. Again she wondered how they both could have been so blind.

"You are good for her," he said. He wanted the doctor to understand that he believed and supported them both.

Maura shook her head, "I think you have that backwards. She's good for me is more like it."

Rondo smirked. "While that is also very true what I said isn't backwards. You are very good for her. You see her. The real her. That's the thing about you Doc. You have this ability to cut through defenses and walls and just see the true soul of a person. You are the only one I've ever known who could get through everything Jane has built around her. You moved through it like it just wasn't even there."

Maura was entirely thrown but what Rondo had said. She couldn't even begin to respond so she sat quietly in the chair. She was glad when it didn't appear that Rondo minded the silence or the abrupt end of that particular conversation.

It took a minute for Maura to compose herself before she spoke again. This time changing subjects. "Rondo, I haven't thanked you for saving my life," she said. She really hadn't had much time with him alone since he woke up and she wanted to make sure she could thank him now.

"You don't..." he started to protest but Maura cut him off.

"Yes, I most certainly do. So you are just going to have to lay there and listen to me." She wasn't going to let him brush off what he had done. "You took a bullet that was meant for me. So, yes I get to say thank you. And saying thank you will never, ever be enough. I know you will say no but I'm telling you right now. If there is ever anything you need, or just want, all you have to do is ask. I'm always going to be there for you and I will always help you with whatever you need." She wanted to do so much for him but she understood he had limits on what help he would or wouldn't accept.

"Doc, I'd do it all again given the same situation," he replied back.

Before Maura could help it she heard herself say, "Why?" She hadn't meant to ask but she was curious as to why he risked his own life to save her.

Rondo was quiet for a minute. Not because he didn't know the answer but because he found it sad that Maura didn't seem to know it. "Doc, when I said that you have the ability to see a person's soul I wasn't just talking about Jane. I was talking about me as well. Besides Jane, you are the only other person who has ever looked at me and actually seen me. Don't you get it? You and Jane have been the only ones who have ever made me feel like I was Raymond Washington and not Rondo. And I'll tell you something Doc, that is more than worth taking a bullet for. In fact it's worth everything to me."

For the second time in a matter of minutes, Maura was rendered speechless. A lone tear trickled down her cheek that she absentmindedly wiped away. They again sat quietly letting the moment settle between the two of them. And finally it was Maura who again broke the silence.

"I'm telling you right now, Raymond, you are staying with me once you are released from this hospital," she said firmly. "At least through your recovery and rehab."

Rondo chuckled at the use of his name. She was probably the only person on the planet, Jane included, he would ever allow to use his first name. "Bunking with you and Vanilla," he said with a flirtatious smile. "Now that I could get used to."

R&I

Jane moved quickly and quietly behind the two SWAT members she was following. They had the rear entry. Frost and three other SWAT members were taking the front. Korsak was with another team covering one of the side entries.

SWAT was going in first but Jane, Frost and Korsak were all going in with them. It was set to be a full on assault of the house. SWAT maneuvers took precision. Once the plan was decided there was no going back. No hesitating. It was full throttle forward. But they were ready. When enough time had elapsed for the other teams to get into place the SWAT officer gave Jane one nod to indicate they were ready. Once she nodded back it was time.

SWAT and Jane entered the house. She know the rest of the guys were entering at the same time just from other locations.

"Police!" "Boston PD!" cries started coming fast and loud.

Several shouts of "Clear!" shortly followed.

The first two rooms were cleared but they were empty. Atwood had yet to be found. Jane and her two SWAT members continued to move through the back of the house. Jane heard sounds coming from a back room. She indicated to the SWAT officers which room to head towards as Frost and Korsak were coming in behind Jane still clearing the other rooms.

Approaching the door Jane nodded at the officers who swiftly kicked in the door and all three advanced into the room. There Jane came face to face with the man she had been pursuing for two weeks.

"Freeze!" was shouted as was "Drop it!" seeing that Atwood had his 9 millimeter in his hand. He stood looking at Jane for a minute and she could tell he was debating his next move.

"Don't do it," she warned with her gun trained on him. "It's over John," she said with conviction. To move the gun even an inch upwards would be the biggest mistake of Atwood's life.

They stood staring at each other for a moment and in that moment he decided. The gun moved up. The two SWAT officers fired. Jane just stood guard making sure he was down. She didn't lower her weapon until the gun was safely out of Atwood's hand.

"We need a bus at our location," was all Jane said into her radio. She looked down at Atwood for a moment and then just turned around and walked out of the room to go check on Frost and Korsak.

R&I

"It was a good day," Korsak said to Jane as she sat at her desk completing the millionth report from the day's raid. "Atwood should recover and he will stand trial. Slim and four others were taken in by Vice. Organized Crime is now looking to build a case. And we freed six girls," he said with a hint of triumph in his voice.

All in all it was a good day. Jane let a smile cross her face. "It really was. None of our guys were hurt so that is the best part of all." She shifted in her chair and started to return her attention back to her reports.

"Jane?" he asked.

"Yeah?" she replied looking back up at him.

"I'm glad you and Maura worked things out. I've always thought you two belonged together," he said.

She shook her head. She wasn't even going to deny it. "Seriously, were we the only two people who didn't see it?" she asked referring to her and Maura.

Vince snickered. "And you are supposed to be a detective."

Jane laughed in spite of herself.

"A good one at that," he added before walking away snickering.

**A/N Tomorrow's chapter will be the last chapter for this story. You all know I believe all stories have an end and we are about to reach this one. As always, the support I've received for this story is beyond what I expected and I continue to be humbled by it. For those of you who commented/reviewed as a 'Guest' sorry I couldn't answer you back throughout the writing of this tale.**


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen

**May 21**

Jane felt a wave of relief wash over her as she pulled her car into the driveway of Maura's home. The protection detail had been removed from Maura and it was oddly comforting for Jane not to see a BPD squad car parked in front of the house. To Jane, that seemed to signal things were starting to return back to normal.

She parked the car and headed for the door. This time she didn't seem to have any hesitations about whether to knock or just enter. She just entered. She was exactly where she belonged and she knew it.

"Maura?" she called out as she entered the house. She rounded the corner and caught her first glimpse of Maura who was sitting in the family room. She couldn't help but smile. Again, the detective just had to marvel at how stunningly beautiful the ME truly was. She was dressed down in just yoga pants and a BPD t-shirt but it was still Jane's favorite look on the woman.

Jane had already recapped the success of the raids to Maura over the phone when she called to let Maura know she and the guys were fine. She had wanted Maura to know things were taken care of and that with Atwood in custody there wasn't a need for the protection detail any longer. Plus, she wanted to make sure Maura was fine with her coming over after she had finished her paperwork.

Maura easily agreed to that. She knew it would finally be a good time to finish the conversation they had started at the hospital the day before. It was time and Maura didn't want to put it off any longer. She had sensed Jane felt the same and wasn't at all surprised when Jane mentioned the need to talk that night before she had to get off the phone and get back to work.

Since both ladies were expecting to have the rest of their 'talk' Jane simply made her way into the family room to join Maura on the couch. Before sitting she did lean in and kiss the doctor hello. That was more of an instinct than something planned and it felt natural. Right. And it made both women smile.

"I'm glad you are here," Maura started with a smile. "Do you want anything to drink or eat?" She wasn't sure if Jane had even had anything outside of coffee for the day given the activities she had been handling.

"I'm good right now. Cavanaugh sprang for lunch for all of us," she said with a smile. The collars were good and she knew the brass would be extremely happy with Cavanaugh and the whole team. Cavanaugh was in a generous mood and treated the gang to burgers from The Robber.

As Jane settled in on the couch she looked over to the coffee table and saw a box sitting there. She knew right away what it was. Maybe not what was in it but she definitely knew what it was. "So you do have one too," Jane said with a smile looking over at the box.

Maura looked over to her 'personal' box and nodded her head. "I have one too," she confirmed. "I thought since you shared yours with me it was only fair that I shared mine with you. Plus, it might help me explain a few things to you," Maura admitted. She had spent time trying to figure out the best way to get Jane to understand why she took off Friday morning. She thought maybe showing Jane her items would help with that explanation.

They sat in silence for a few moments but it wasn't an uncomfortable one. Jane wasn't going to force the conversation with Maura so she was prepared to just let Maura start talking when she was ready. She knew this was Maura's conversation to have with her and she didn't want to interfere. It was what Maura had done for her when she went through her 'personal' box a few weeks back so she owed it to Maura to just listen.

Without making a motion to the box yet, Maura started. "I don't think I will ever be able to fully apologize for running out on you Friday. You have to understand that there wasn't anything about sleeping with you that I regretted or didn't want to happen. I know I made you believe that when you woke up alone but it wasn't what we did that I ran from. Please believe that.

"I have had feelings for you for a long time. Almost from the first time we met. I just never acted on them. Not so much because I didn't want to but more because I was afraid to lose everything I had gained having you in my life. I'm not sure you appreciate just how much you have given me. Until you understand that, I don't know if I can fully explain why I was so scared I had just lost it all."

Maura leaned over and took the lid off of the box on the table. Like the exercise she had completed with Jane just a few weeks prior, she handed the box to Jane. Jane understood what Maura wanted so she reached into the box and pulled out the first item. It was a bracelet with a heart pendent. There was a 'M' engraved on the heart. But the bracelet was so small in size Jane knew it was a child's bracelet.

"According to my mother, this was with the belongings given to her when they adopted me. She found it in a side pocket of the diaper bag. There was no indication on whether it was placed there on purpose or simply forgotten. But, for whatever reason, she kept it. She even let me wear it when I was younger but I don't recall ever wearing it.

"When they finally told me I was adopted my mother gave the bracelet to me. She said she thought that it was left in the bag on purpose and that she believed that my biological parents wanted me to have at least something of theirs. I think she thought she was doing a nice thing for me by keeping it and giving it to me but for years it had the opposite effect on me.

"For years, anytime I looked at that bracelet I was just reminded that I really didn't belong to anyone. My biological parents had given me up with no explanation or reasoning as to why. And my parents were very removed from my life. So much so at times I wondered why they even bothered to adopt me. They never took an active interest in my life. I was practically raised by nannies and housekeepers. So, instead of seeing a kind act from my mother, whenever I would look at that bracelet it just felt like a constant reminder that I didn't know who I was or where I belonged."

Jane looked at the bracelet and without looking up at Maura She couldn't help but speak. "You belong Maura," she said quietly. "You belong to me." She never wanted Maura to feel unwanted or alone ever again. She couldn't change Maura's past for her but she would do anything to make sure Maura understood that she had people in her life now who loved her.

Maura let a smile cross her face but Jane knew there was sorrow behind it. "I know," she said after a moment. "And I even understand that my mother wasn't making a statement about not wanting me when she kept that bracelet for me but growing up, it felt different than it does now."

Maura had a better relationship with her parents now than when she did when she was a child. Time and perspective had helped Maura see things differently as an adult than when she was a child but having that insight didn't change the loneliness she felt while growing up.

Jane didn't really know what to say to Maura about her adoption. She knew Maura had questions for years about who her birth parents were. And, unfortunately for Maura, Jane also knew that finding out about that paternity didn't give Maura the answers she had been looking for. Sometimes Jane wondered if it would have been better if Maura hadn't discovered Patrick Doyle and Hope Martin were her biological parents. From Jane's perspective, that knowledge had not offered Maura any relief or comfort to this point.

Maura looked down at the bracelet. There was still uncertainty tied to it but it was a part of her life. She felt it was a symbol. An odd link between what could have been and what was to be. Although things had improved for her as she got older with her parents, there were times where she still struggled with her sense of identity.

After a few moments of silence, Maura nodded to Jane indicating she wanted to move on. Jane put down the bracelet and reached into the box pulling out a program. As Jane looked at it she realized it was the program from Maura's Harvard Medical School graduation. She looked up at Maura who simply said "Turn it over."

Jane complied and she turned the program over and saw a handwritten note:

_Maura, congratulations on the fulfillment of one of your dreams. Your mother and I are so proud of you. -Father_

Jane was a little surprised to find a handwritten note on a program. She looked up at Maura and waited for an explanation.

"They were both out of town and I honestly hadn't expected either of them to make my graduation. But at the last minute my father was able to get a flight and make the ceremony. I didn't even know he was there until he approached me after it was all done. Because of the last minute timing he didn't bring my actual graduation gift. That I received when I met both of my parents in Paris two weeks later."

Jane was trying not to react to the mere fact that her parents were going to miss her medical school graduation. She had some distinct opinions about the support Maura clearly did not consistently receive from her family. But, this wasn't the place for her to express such an opinion so she let Maura continue.

"When he found me in the crowd after the ceremony he handed me this program and simply said he was proud of me. It was the first time he had ever said that to me. I had always thought he was happy with the choices I'd made and what I'd accomplished but until he scribbled that note I was never completely sure he was proud of me."

Again Jane couldn't keep quiet. "Maura, there is absolutely no way that anyone who knows you could be anything other than proud of you. Proud of what you've done, what you continue to do and of who you are as a person."

Maura looked into Jane's eyes and saw nothing but sincerity and love reflecting back. She fought to keep tears from forming. She had wanted to get through this without crying. She gave Jane a nod that told Jane to move onto the next item. Jane pulled out a photo that also had a ticket stub paperclipped to it and smiled.

"I'd never been to a baseball game before. I hadn't really thought much about it but when they found out I'd never been to a game based on their reaction I thought I had committed a major offense," she said with a smile.

"You had committed a major offense Maura. It is just completely un-American not to have seen at least one baseball game in person. I think they decided that you had spent too much time over in Europe and they needed to remind you of something purely American," Jane answered back.

The photo was of Maura, Tommy and Frankie all in Red Sox apparel. "I had never been more surprised by anything in my life than the day your brothers showed up at my house with a baseball jersey, a hat and three tickets for the game. It wasn't the game as much as it was the fact that it was your brothers who were asking me to go to the game. I had honestly thought my first Red Sox game would have been with you. Not your brothers."

Jane smiled again. Shortly after it was clear that Maura was going to become a permanent staple in the lives of the Rizzolis, Frankie approached Jane and asked if it would be a good idea if he and Tommy took Maura to a game. Both Frankie and Tommy wanted to welcome Maura into the family and he said taking her to her first Sox game felt like a 'brother' kind of thing to do. Jane loved the idea. She knew it would mean a lot to Maura for the boys to take her and she knew it would help Maura to realize she now had family in her life.

"Fenway and the Rizzoli clan is kind of like a sacred rite of passage. It was their way of welcoming you to the family," Jane answered back still smiling.

Jane pulled out the second to last item in the box and just looked at Maura. Part of her was surprised to see it but a part of her wasn't. "Really?" she said and she handed over to Maura the same movie ticket stub that sat in her 'personal' box in her apartment.

"I kept mine too," Maura said with a smile. "It was the first time anyone had asked me to go somewhere just because. The first time trying to be friends with someone wasn't connected to an agenda or a social obligation. I was so nervous that I was going to finally do something that would scare you off. I thought for sure that one full night with me was all it was going to take for you to realize that we shouldn't be friends. But that didn't happen. At the end of night before we left the theater you were talking about meeting for lunch the next day. Even back then you were unlike anything I had ever experienced before."

Jane just smiled. She couldn't really think of anything to say about the ticket stub that hadn't already been said so she pulled out the last item in the box and didn't even try to stop the giggle that came out of her. "Ma is going to flip when she finds out where this went," she said in a threatening tone to Maura.

"Jane! You can't!" Maura nearly panicked. She hadn't thought about Jane telling on her. "You really can't say anything, please!"

Jane's giggle turned into a full laugh. "Alright, alright. Calm down. I won't say a word. But, just so you understand, I went through hell because of this," she said with a serious look across her face. "Do you know how long and _where_ she made me look for this?"

Guilt started to creep across Maura's face. "Bad?" she asked sheepishly.

"Garbage Maura. I was rooting around in garbage for this," Jane said and grimaced with the memory. Jane almost wanted to be mad at her but the look on her face was so adorable she really didn't even try.

"I'm sorry," was all Maura offered. "But you have to understand that it was the my very first one."

"Ever?" Jane asked surprised.

"Ever," Maura admitted.

With that admission, Jane couldn't help but just stare at Maura. It broke her heart what Maura had just said. She then looked back down at the Christmas stocking Angela had made for Maura for the first Christmas Maura had spent with the Rizzolis. She didn't know what to say.

"My parents were never big on Christmas. I mean, we did a nice dinner and we exchanged gifts but we never did a Christmas tree or any decorating. So when you invited me to spend Christmas with you and your family that first year, I just thought it would be dinner and maybe a simple gift exchange.

"I wasn't ready for the Rizzoli Christmas experience. The decorations, the tree, the way your house smelled. It was a mix of pine and sugar I hadn't ever experienced anything quite like it before. But what meant the most to me was when I saw that stocking hanging over the fireplace right next to yours. Like I was actually part of the family. What I felt seeing that up isn't anything I will ever be able to describe to you."

Jane smiled. "Ma was so upset when it disappeared. She was convinced it had been thrown out in the trash with all the wrapping paper. She kept mumbling that she couldn't believe that she had lost it when she had just added you to the family. The one she uses for you now she still complains about every year. She says just isn't the same. But that woman keeps an eagle eye on it until it is taken down each year and put in the correct box."

Jane couldn't believe Maura had taken the stocking. Or maybe she could. She knew that there were many things Maura had missed out on in her life and Jane had tried to make up for as many of those things as she could over the years. She just wondered if she would ever be able to make up for it all sometimes.

"Please don't tell Angela. And I'm sorry you had to look through trash. I just," she said and paused. "It was the first time I understood what having family at Christmas was supposed to actually feel like."

With that, Maura finally lost the fight on the tears that had been threatening to form. They had formed. And they started to fall. In an instant Jane had Maura in her arms as she tried to comfort her. Maura relaxed immediately into Jane's strong arms. "All of this," Maura said quietly and nodding towards all the items from the box, "all of this is why I panicked the other morning."

Jane didn't say anything. She just continued to hold Maura who by now and nestled her head into the side of Jane's neck. After a minute Maura continued.

"Every sense of actual family I have that I know is real and that I can trust and believe in is tied into you and your family. I'd thought about telling you how I felt about you several different times over the years but I was scared that you wouldn't feel the same. And that made me believe that if you thought I felt something you didn't I might lose you. I stood the risk of losing not only my best friend but what had become my family. I just couldn't risk it.

"When I woke up two days ago in your bed, my first thoughts were nothing but pure happiness. I've loved you for a long time and I was so happy we finally were together. But then I remembered that you didn't kiss me back right away. That scared me. I started to believe that maybe you didn't want this. That I somehow forced it on you and that when you woke up you would be mad at me. Then I started to believe I had just messed up our entire friendship. That I just might have lost not only you but what sense of family I had.

"I panicked. It was the wrong thing to do but I did and I had to leave. I didn't know what to say to you. How to react to you when you woke up. The only thing I thought I knew for sure was that if you saw how panicked I was you would think it was all a mistake and I thought that would seal the deal. I'm so sorry I left Jane. I never, ever meant to hurt you like that."

Jane tightened her hold on Maura and placed a kiss on her forehead. She did understand. She had felt similar fears for well over a year so she really didn't have the right to hold the same concerns against Maura. Thinking about everything she suddenly chuckled.

"What?" Maura asked.

"I was just thinking about how much time we both foolishly wasted by letting our fears keep us from each other. If only I had just talked to you when I heard that phone conversation."

"If only I had told you from the beginning how I felt about you," Maura added. "We both made the same mistakes." She paused and then added, "I should have just listened to my mother."

That Jane hadn't expected. "Excuse me?" she asked.

Maura snickered. "She told me that I should just be honest with you and tell you how I felt. She thought you felt the same and she couldn't understand why I didn't trust that things would work out."

"When did she tell you all of this?" Jane couldn't believe even Constance, who barely interacted with either her or Maura, seemed to know how they both felt.

Maura sighed. "During that infamous phone conversation you overheard," she started. "A call that I now can only assume you didn't stuck around to hear in its entirety."

"Your mother told you that you should tell me how you feel during that call?" Jane asked. She was shocked.

"Yes she did," Maura answered. Ever since Jane had mentioned that call two days ago Maura had been trying to remember all of the details. She was still uncertain how Jane could ever have taken her side of the call as any kind of threat against their friendship.

"No," Jane said shaking her head. "I heard. I heard what you said." Her tone was incredulous. She wasn't mad she was just genuinely confused.

"What exactly, and by that I mean specifically about you, did you hear me say?" Maura asked.

"You said, 'Jane doesn't feel that way. And even if she does, she knows how I feel so I can only hope it won't be an issue in the future.' " Jane couldn't help but wince when she said it.

Maura looked up at Jane. She then reached out her hand and intertwined her fingers with Jane's. "After you heard that, what did you do?"

"I walked away. And then I went home," she answered. She refrained from admitting to Maura that she stopped by the bathroom and empty the contents of her stomach. Maura really didn't need to be told that at this point.

"So you missed the best part of that call," Maura answered back.

"Huh?" Jane replied still extremely surprised that there could be any kind of good part of that call.

"Jane," Maura said looking Jane directly in the eyes. "First, you need to understand what I was responding to. Mother stated that she thought my turning down a date with Garrett was because you hated him and what he represented. She was going on about how you saw him as 'high society' and that I was worried that you would be jealous or upset with me for seeing him simply because of his wealth. She thought you would be threatened by anyone from what she called the right 'social circles' wanting to have anything to do with me.

"The response from me you heard was my attempt to straighten her misconception out. I simply tried to tell her that you didn't feel that way about Garrett. The part about knowing how I felt and it not being an issue in the future, I meant that you knew I didn't want to be involved with Garrett or those 'social circles' anymore. You and I had talked about that a few times. You knew I wasn't interested in dating for status. And I didn't think you would ever feel like our friendship would be threatened."

Jane was trying to piece everything together in her head so what she heard could now match what Maura said it had all meant. "So, what was this best part of the call that I missed?" she asked.

"Once I had convinced her that my turning down Garrett had everything to do with the fact that I wasn't interested in him in that way and not because of you somehow she asked me if I was interested in anyone at all. You missed my answer."

Jane steadied her eyes onto Maura's and asked. "What was that answer?"

"I told her I was interested in you," Maura said.

Jane released the breath she didn't even realize she had been holding. "You did?"

Maura smiled and reached up her hand placing it on Jane's cheek. "Yes, I did. I told her I had strong feelings for you but that I didn't think you felt the same. That's when she told me she was only asking about you hating Garrett and being jealous because she thought you had feelings for me and she thought it was because of those feelings that you would be jealous of anyone I dated. She told me I should just tell you how I felt.

"I tried to explain that I was afraid to ruin our friendship and that I'd rather have you as a friend than not in my life at all. That's when she told me that the difference between being truly happy and merely getting by was just a simple matter of deciding not to settle for less than what I really wanted. She told I shouldn't settle for less than all of you if that's what I wanted. Looking back, I really should have listened to her."

Jane thought back to that day in the hallway. She had walked away before listening to the end of Maura's conversation. Had she stayed just a few moments longer she would have heard Maura telling her mother she was interested in her and that she had some of the same fears. They really had wasted so much time they could have been together.

"Or I should have listened to mine. She has spent the last year trying to get me to tell you how I felt," Jane added. Maura wasn't the only one who didn't listen to her mother.

"Angela's known for a year?" Maura asked herself now suddenly shocked.

"Yeah, she sort of helped put me back together after that call and it all slipped out. I made her promise on the lives of unborn grandchildren never to even hint to you that I was in love with you," Jane answered sheepishly.

"Mothers really do know best?" Maura asked with a grin.

"Don't ever tell mine that or we'll never hear the end of it," Jane said with a chuckle.

Jane let the moment pass between them and then straightened up shifting Maura so she was still in her arms but looking directly into her eyes. "No matter how it was that we got here. We are here now. You need to know. I need to tell you. I love you. You are everything to me," she let the words register with Maura and then pulled her into a deep, passionate kiss that served to demonstrate just how much she really did love her.

When the kiss finally broke Maura rested her forehead against Jane's. "I love you, too."

The two women both moved in for another kiss. All their fears melted away as they let themselves get lost in the comfort they now found in each other. Neither had lost a thing. Instead, they both gained exactly what they needed. They had gained each other.


End file.
